Introductions

Walt

Hello.

I have been following this forum for three years, but only now have I had the courage to register.

My name is Walt, a 22-year-old man, a virgin. I study in my hometown and I live in a family house with my mother

Like many of you, I was put in a chastity by my mother at the age of 18, while still in high school. The reason for putting me in a chastity was excessive masturbation, which caused me to fail in my studies and fail my mock exams. Shortly after these exams, I was caught masturbating by my mother, so she linked my failure in the exams to masturbation.

I was reprimanded by my mother who adheres to the principle "My house - my rules" and she had a conversation with me in which she made it clear that she did not tolerate such behavior at home. She encouraged me to chastity and gave me many privileges such as my own car and money for studies, which I would not have to worry about and instead of working, I could devote myself to learning and my own interests.

I reluctantly agreed and later regretted my decision to lock myself in a chastity. However, after getting used to chastity, I do not regret this decision, because it helped me concentrate and focus on studies and other things where masturbation was very disturbing.
Nevertheless, I miss freedom and privacy, but when I agreed to be locked up, I knew that I would be locked up until I finished my studies and moved out of the house, and even more so, any requests for early release were out of the question.

Angelina

Walt

welcome to the forum 🙂

youdontknowme You are an adult. Those are not "privileges" anymore.

@Walt who pays for this? So who really owns these items, I think that can clarify whether they are his rights or whether they are privileges

youdontknowme

Hi Walt. Welcome to the community. Sorry for starting out with so crude a question, but am I understanding it correctly that you have not had relief for all those years? That is impressive. I doubt many boys your age could be denied for that long and remain so chill about it.

Some more questions, by category. Feel free to answer them at your own pace, or not at all if they feel too intimate:
Friends and Family

Do you know how your mother found out about chastity devices?
Are you aware of any other wearers in your extended family and/or your social circle
Has your chastity device ever put you in an awkward situation with other people?

Consent

Would it be possible for you to renoznce wearing your chastity device? Obviously there would be a cost, like losing a lot of the financial support you are getting at the moment, but is the option on the table at all?
Would it be possible for you to negotiate more liberal treatment (like private or semi-private breaks) in any way?
Have there ever been situations where the device caused you some form of distress (pain, emotional suffering or similar), and if yes, how did your keyholder handle that?
Has your keyholder ever imposed any rules that you had not explicitly consented to? If so, was that under an implicit or blanket consent or just a unilateral imposition? Especially in case of the latter, what became of that?

Device and security

~~What device are you wearing? Not necessarily the exact model, though it would be nice if you could tell, but just a description would go a long way.~~ Never mind, saw it in your other post. Any further security measures or just the stock cage with the locking cylinder and a strap?
Has it been secure against pulling out? How about stimulation through the device?
How often do you need to unlock for hygiene purposes?

Sexual matters

Do you get wet dreams? If so, how often, and how much do you feel them?
How have you been coping with sexual urges over the years, and would you say it has gotten easier over time?
Do you think chastity has impacted your romantic pursuits?

Outlook

Overall, do you think chastity has improved your life more than it has impeded it?
How would you want to continue chastity after finishing your studies? Would you want to leave it behind completely, continue under similar terms? More liberal terms? More restrictive ones? If you are interested in continuing, what would be the next objective to work towards?

Milord

youdontknowme this should became a standard template when someone join!

Walt

youdontknowme
Hello and thank you for your welcome. I will try to answer all your questions.

Since my mother doesn't believe in masturbation, I wasn't allowed to have any relief. At first it was unbearable, especially since I masturbated a lot before being locked up and finding myself in a situation where I was locked up made me feel frustrated and want to escape. However, after 2 unsuccessful attempts, after which I was caught and punished, I gave up trying to escape. However, I was not left alone with this and my mother supports me to this day, encouraging me to do things that distract me from the desire to run away and masturbate again. However, there are moments when, despite getting used to it, it is still difficult, but I try to fight it, and so far I am successful.

Friends and family

I found out while talking to my mother moments after she caught me. My mother admitted that she began to worry that I was lagging behind in my studies and began to watch me what I was doing in my room and searched my computer in my absence, especially since I was at home most of the time after school. She searched the Internet and came across articles about chastity and decided it was worth a try.
I don't know anyone in my circles who is into chastity.
I hide it as much as I can, covering my studies and learning, giving up social outings, which I limit to a minimum. However, I had a few awkward situations.

Agreement

it is possible, but it would involve limiting the money for studies, giving back the car and taking away certain privileges that I received by agreeing to chastity. I considered this option, but I would have a lot to lose.
by agreeing to the closure, I agreed to completely unlock it only after finishing my studies and moving out of the house when I find a job and my own apartment. I can't negotiate breaks, which doesn't mean I didn't try, but I was refused because of the rules I agreed to.
physical pain caused at the beginning of wearing the chastity, especially at night, but after some time it subsided. Frustration at not masturbating and wanting to escape.
In the first case, cooling helped, in the second case, punishment and rules to prevent it, and also encouraging conversations to distract me from my temptations with other activities.
yes, but it was discussed with me, all the pros and cons were presented and I had to agree to it. Nothing was forced on me.

Device and safety

only belt and chastity with locking cylinder. At home I am monitored and outside I don't want to tamper with my chastity so as not to be detected.
At night, I am additionally secured to prevent me from leaving the cage and manipulating it.
I've tried stimulation by rubbing against a pillow at night, but it doesn't work and there's no point.
I have heard about vibration massagers and stimulation through prostate massage, but I cannot do so because I am monitored during the day and additionally protected at night.

I am excused for hygiene every other day, for a specific period of time to prevent me from masturbating. I am given keys to get out of my chastity in the bathroom and immediately after that I have to wash them under supervision. After washing my chastity, I have a short time to wash my intimate areas or a slightly longer time to depilate. After completing the hygiene of my intimate parts, I must immediately put on the chastity, return the key and finish washing. After washing, the chastity is checked to see if it has been properly closed. The checking is done only with my hands under supervision.

Sexual matters

I have wet dreams every 1 or 2 months and leaks during the day.
I'm a virgin and I discovered masturbation very late, and once I started doing it, I did it all the time. After being locked in a chastity, it was initially difficult and I felt frustrated, but gradually I started to find my way in the new situation and thanks to activities aimed at distracting me from my sexual drive, it became easier. However, I think that being a virgin helped me get used to the new reality to some extent, but I think it would have been even more difficult then.
I think it has an influence, because due to the fact that I am closed, I am not interested in relationships and meetings with the opposite sex, so I am not currently dating anyone. On the other hand, I am still young and I have time for it, and besides, I have priority in the form of learning and studies, which I like, and chastity helps me with this, although sometimes it is a burden for me.

Perspectives

on the one hand, it improved, because thanks to chastity I focus on learning and studies that are important to me and I like them, I started to pay attention to things that were previously unimportant or of little importance to me, I am more focused and attentive, which has a big impact on my life and above all, I discovered other interests.
However, on the other hand, it is a burden and a challenge for me because being locked down, I have to give up other things in between others who would risk others discovering that I wear chastity and things that chastity prevents me from doing. However, I say that chastity has improved my life.
it's a long way off, I would definitely like to experience freedom and other things that chastity prevents me from doing. But it is possible that I will continue wearing a chastity under the same liberal or more restrictive rules and conditions.
Time will tell.

Milord

Walt

Almost fearful to ask but... what do you mean with additional restraints during the night?

Sasha

Walt What additional restraints and how are you punished?

Milord

Walt
Also, where are you from?

youdontknowme

Walt Thank you for your elaborate response.

If this is all accurate (and I sincerely hope some of it is exaggerated for dramatic effect), this is horrifying to read. I mean, the whole "no masturbation ever" thing seems oppressive enough by itself, but between the limited privacy and nighttime restrictions, the notion that she would expect you to just endure the pain of wearing an unfamiliar cage and the fact that you still consider her supportive after all that, you can consider me quite shocked.

I second Sasha's and Milord's questions about punishment and nighttime restrictions.

Has your mother ever made any indications what it is that has her so categorically against masturbation? I understand being against excessive masturbation if that has caused you trouble in other areas of life before, but being completely against masturbation to the point where you would consider such drastic measures usually has other explanations behind it.

On a related note, how is your father involved? Is he still in the picture, and if so, what are his views on your situation?

Also, I recognize that it would be very difficult for you to negotiate release breaks if your mother's main concern is any form of masturbation. However, that does not mean you would not be able to negotiate more privacy for yourself while still remaining under the cage's control - however, that negotiation only has a chance of succeeding if your mother has something to lose by not agreeing. And if a strain on your relationship is not enough or too much for you to bear, and your mother is confident that you would not give up the financial support for that privacy, it may be difficult to use her desire to prevent you from self-pleasure (and probably also premarital sex) as a bargaining chip. For an example of someone who was successful despite the parents being categorically against masturbation, look at @Lukas and his sister.

As for your social life, do you regret not getting out more? Would you be willing to talk about some of the awkwardness you have experienced that you are trying to avoid?

Walt

At night I wear washable absorbent panties to prevent me from touching my chastity and to protect the bed from wet dreams, and a tight pajama suit with a zipper at the back secured by a flap with strong clips to prevent opening.
I've been wearing this set since I was
caught trying to pull out my chastity while in bed.

Sasha

Taking away my privileges, including my car, taking away my computer and telephone, banning television and grounding me at home.

Milord

I prefer to remain anonymous in this area.

Ines

If you want, you can also join the conversation and express your opinion on this matter, you are welcome.

youdontknowme

You're right, from my point of view it also seemed terrifying at first and it was when I got locked up so even though I agreed to the benefits and privileges, I quickly regretted it. The frustration was growing and I wanted to cheat at all costs and escape from the device, which resulted in a punishment.
I understand your shock that it was my mother who locked me in chastity, monitors me for compliance and at the same time I have her support. However, the reality is that I did not want to talk about it with anyone from the outside, feeling ashamed of the fact that I masturbated excessively, and noticed that it caused me to neglect other more important and important matters for me, even though it was pleasant and masturbation was the reason for this. I was locked up. She helped me take my mind off it and control my frustration by offering me other, more useful activities that would absorb my time and encourage me to think other than masturbation and the desire to escape. Besides, she didn't force me to do it, I noticed that she was neglecting other things, but the momentary pleasure won. She made me realize this even more, offering me other privileges and I decided to close, although reluctantly.

My father doesn't live with us and I have no contact with him. You could say that I practically don't know him.

My mother says that masturbation is disgusting, especially in excessive amounts. He also believes that it takes away the strength and willingness to have a real relationship and, above all, leads to neglecting other matters, and he is right in this respect. I asked why she was so against it, but she always replied that she had such beliefs and that was the end of the matter.
I tried to convince her to let me please her at least temporarily by agreeing to lock myself in the chastity again, but the conversation always ended with the fact that if she wanted to leave, I could do it forever, but I would lose money for studies, a car and other privileges, and if I agreed to wear a chastity until the end of my studies and when I move out, a temporary break for pleasure is not an option. I don't know what the conversation would be like if she used the argument of wanting to try real sex, I haven't talked to her about it and I don't know if she knows that I've never done it before. Sometimes I come back to this conversation and my mother is equally persistent, seeing that it has a positive impact on me, it is not a big limitation for me because I don't struggle with it like I used to. I think he wants the best for me, especially since I was neglecting my studies, which are important in the future.

I read this thread and I am full of admiration that it was successful despite the conservative views of his parents. Maybe I'll finally succeed.

Sometimes I would like to go out without putting myself in an awkward situation, but I am by nature shy and a homebody. Moreover, the awkward situations I have experienced inhibit me more from social gatherings.
I can mention one awkward situation during a social gathering.

Milord

I don't think this is coercion or abuse. I agreed to chastity and I can give it up and lose my privileges, but I don't want it, even though it is sometimes hard for me. Despite the inconvenience, I believe that being locked in a chastity house has a positive effect on me

Max9

I have this chastity support hip belt. It makes wearing a chastity more comfortable.

Ines

Oh! I almost lose this.
I have enough popcorn popcorn🍿 and I am flaked for a capybara and a tiger shark as anxious as me for read the answers.

Sasha

Ines Have a few spots marked out preemptively on the bingo card already

Milord

youdontknowme however, that negotiation only has a chance of succeeding if your mother has something to lose by not agreeing.

Like calling the police for coercion and abuse.
Sorry, I could not resist.

youdontknowme

Milord I doubt he is willing to take that step.

Milord

youdontknowme

This is why i added

Milord Sorry, I could not resist.

Because I'm sure it's totally useless. Sometimes one is self best jailer.

Max9

Walt chastity with locking cylinder

if you mean a cage, there are straps that go round your hips and advances the comfort of the cage.

Walt additionally secured

how?

Walt have to wash them under supervision

a classic

Walt I'm a virgin and I discovered masturbation very late

👍🏻👍🏻

Walt However, I say that chastity has improved my life

👍🏻👍🏻

Milord

Walt

If your story is true, here there isn't a reg flag, there is an enormous red sheet.
Others will explain why much better, so I will just point out something. I will do as a father
Supporting your studies is not a privilege. It is the right of any son. Also, giving a child while he studies the things he need is a parent's duty
In this forum, I bet that almost anyone, with just a couple of exceptions will tell you how much is wrong
https://unwedchastity.org/d/1006-why-it-is-wrong-for-a-parent-to-use-chastity-on-offspring/
Here I write several reasons why it's wrong, and it's the first time that almost all of them apply.
@Kaja @youdontknowme @Joh

youdontknowme

Walt At night I wear washable absorbent panties to prevent me from touching my chastity and to protect the bed from wet dreams, and a tight pajama suit with a zipper at the back secured by a flap with strong clips to prevent opening.
I've been wearing this set since I was
caught trying to pull out my chastity while in bed.

Urgh, wearing tight clothes to bed... still, better than what some other keyholders had tried to prevent inappropriate fighting with the chastity device.

Walt Taking away my privileges, including my car, taking away my computer and telephone, banning television and grounding me at home.

You are an adult. Those are not "privileges" anymore.

Walt conversation always ended with the fact that if she wanted to leave, I could do it forever, but I would lose money for studies, a car and other privileges, and if I agreed to wear a chastity until the end of my studies and when I move out, a temporary break for pleasure is not an option.

If you are not willing to take that option (or more severe ones like threatening legal action), your negotiating power is going to be severely limited. But maybe you could agree on more privacy without the promise of relief, at least until you get caught cheating again. It looks as if she is treating you like a little child, and combined with the humiliating privacy restrictions you endure, your current arrangement seems to be stunting your growth as a person - which will make it harder for you to land a job that makes you financially independent or find a romantic partner, even if you went outside more.

I would be very curious about the shame you fear when going outside though, and if you could give an example of awkward situations you have experienced, this would be great.

Joh

Walt

I can only recommend that you read the relevant laws in your country that deal with parents' duty of care.
I also recommend that you research how your mother has to support you. In our country, parents are obliged to support the child financially with everything it needs until its first degree.
I would also try to find out what the general view is in your country if your mother forces you to carry the CB.
It could very well be that your mother has made herself liable to prosecution and could face prison if it becomes known.
If you have this information, you can negotiate much better. E.g. for me-time.

The fact that your mum finds masturbating disgusting is up to her. But it's going too far to force her opinion on you.

Furthermore, your mum should help you to develop further. But if she deprives you of any opportunity to get to grips with it yourself through the CB, she will achieve the exact opposite. Since you can't learn, when you are out of the CB you will most likely fail again and masturbate too much.

Sasha

Walt I have very strong opinions about parents forcing their kids to wear “absorbent panties” and similar products and restricting their removal. Because for one it has an immense phycological impact being put back in that, not to mention takes a long time adjusting to sleeping in them
The restrictions making removal impossible also creates a dependency on them, since you’ll eventually have to take care of business.
Do not support this abuse at all.
The punishments are less severe than I’d expected, but in this day and age, having a means of communication is vital. Almost a safety issue at this point.
The car I suppose depends who owns it. But restricting the computer I also see as a potential issue for completing school work.
All that being said, threatening your education if you don’t comply is just wrong, and you really shouldn’t stand for it. I’d it hard working and attending classes? Yes. Is it worth it to not be abused? YES!

Tjc

youdontknowme You are an adult. Those are not "privileges" anymore.

It may not be a privilege (more a right or a necessity) to have a car or computer or phone but it is a privilege (in many places) to have them provided by parents to adult children. It is interesting to read that in Germany it is a requirement for a parent to support a child until they obtain their first degree. What happens if the child decides not to get a degree? Does this happen? when does the parental obligation end?
A computer may be required for success in school but I can see it being restricted to only schoolwork as a punishment for not following rules.

youdontknowme

Angelina That can be argued especially about the car. But definitely not about going out.

Milord

Angelina i know you disagree, but a parent that blackmail his son into chastity in exchange with study is a disgusting creature.

Angelina

Milord in exchange with study

in exchange for having financial advantages, that's why I disagree, that's something different

youdontknowme But definitely not about going out.

I would agree to a limited extent, he is an adult, but he still lives at home

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