Belting for nieces?

Jenna

Renita That is an option, but one I would prefer to avoid. I am older and have greater control over my body and not acting on my desires. I don't need a belt to help me with that. These are young girls who are unfamiliar with their bodies and sexual urges. I would prefer to keep it that way until they are older.

Renita

Jenna I am older and have greater control over my body and not acting on my desires

And you prefer to sleep around with boys?

Jenna I don't need a belt to help me with that

It would be a good example for your nieces.

Jenna

Joh I am sorry. I did not realize that. We live in California, in the US.

I did not realize the legalities part, and this is not something I can openly discuss with the authorities. I was under the impression that they are under my control until they were 18?

Also, where would I get official help? Are there counselors that specialize in this area?

Joh

Jenna I did not realize the legalities part, and this is not something I can openly discuss with the authorities. I was under the impression that they are under my control until they were 18?

I recommend you find out which law applies in your country.
Have a look at this topic: Pressure
Also good to read
Convention on the Rights of the Child.

Someone from USA has posted about the legal situation in USA. As soon as I find it I post it.

Angelina

Jenna

hello, welcome to the forum

first of all i think you should have talked to your nieces before ordering the belts. how did you take the measurements? what did you tell them

well, now the belts are already there, but forcing or pressuring is always the worst option. first i would talk to both of them, maybe you can convince them with your arguments, if not you can of course try to talk them into a deal, so that you give them something in return if they wear the belts.

and no, legally you are not right, you must not legally force them

Jenna I did not realize the legalities part, and this is not something I can openly discuss with the authorities. I was under the impression that they are under my control until they were 18?

in certain areas you have control, but not when it comes to your niece's body. You can't hurt her on purpose or anything. Just because they are minors doesn't mean they don't have rights

Jenna I am hoping for an outcome where all sides agree.

That's OK in my opinion, but you should accept it even if you can't find a way to get their in the belt

Jenna

Renita I am in a committed monogamous relationship with another woman. The girls are aware of this and have no issue. My girlfriend stays over at the house maybe only once per month. We are discreet and she leaves early in the morning, before they get up.

My reluctance to wearing a belt is two fold. I think I would find it uncomfortable and also it sends the wrong message. I don't want the girls to think that wearing a chastity belt is a lifetime commitment, if I am wearing one at 35 what does that tell them? I think they need to approach it as something they must do until marriage, and if they wish to continue after that then that decision is between them and their spouse. It would be at that ceremony that the key would be turned over.

Laura

Jenna I think they need to approach it as something they must do until marriage

Have you ever been married?

Renita

Jenna The girls are aware of this and have no issue

But you give them a bad example.

Jenna if I am wearing one at 35 what does that tell them?

That you are single, furthermore was never married. Age is not a problem, just your marital status.

Jenna like premarital sex, which I want to avoid at all costs. My sister did that and that is why we are in this situation now.

How about you? I doubt you are virgin. But it's not too late if you start wearing a chastity belt now.

Joh

Jenna I am in a committed monogamous relationship with another woman. The girls are aware of this and have no issue. My girlfriend stays over at the house maybe only once per month. We are discreet and she leaves early in the morning, before they get up.

Jenna That can lead to other things though, like premarital sex, which I want to avoid at all costs.

Why is your girlfriend leaving in the morning?
It sounds to me like you're not committed to your relationship. Furthermore, you are of the opinion that premarital sex should not happen, but you do it yourself.
As mentioned before, it takes a lot of trust with the key holder to whom you agree to take responsibility. Your behaviour is contradictory and you apply different values to your nieces and to yourself. There can be no trust.

I recommend that you first clarify for yourself what is right and wrong for you. Then start living by them. Only when you can show that you abide by the rules yourself can you demand the same from your nieces.

Sin

Jenna if necessary I force them to wear the belts

What you are talking about is the sexual abuse of a minor (and a family member). Please stop and seek professional help.

Jenna I am their legal guardian and I have other leverage too including control over their finances until they are older.

Here is a list of child protective services in you state. You should call the one in your county and discuss you plans. I'm sure they could help find a satisfactory outcome for all of the children in your care:
https://www.cdss.ca.gov/reporting/report-abuse/child-protective-services/report-child-abuse

Jenna

Sin Thank you.

Rina

Sin What you are talking about is the sexual abuse of a minor (and a family member).

@Jenna Being legal guardian doesn't mean you can abuse them, and forcing things like chastity belt on minor would certainly constitute child abuse. I agree to @Sin and you should find professional help instead.

Jenna

Joh Thank you. I did not realize the legal implications. No one will be forced to do anything. I am hoping for an outcome where all sides agree.

Joh

Jenna The job of parents and guardian is to teach to survive in the world. The boundary is the law in your country.
Explore their body and sexual feeling is natural and part of the development. You have to teach them where the risks are. They should understand what a lightly mad decision will have consequences for the rest of their live like get pregnant.
You can not prevent all mistake but I hope you can guide them to avoid the big one.

Jenna

Laura No

Laura

Jenna Then your statement is applied to you

Jenna

Laura I understand what you are saying, that would be hypocritical of me. Perhaps we can work something out where the key is turned over upon college graduation? In any case this age is too young. However the older niece turns 18 in a few weeks.

Joh

Angelina if not you can of course try to talk them into a deal, so that you give them something in return if they wear the belts.

This is a bad advice. She is in an other position than their nieces. We had already discuss it their nieces are not in the position to oversee the consequences it will have.

Jenna

Angelina first of all i think you should have talked to your nieces before ordering the belts. how did you take the measurements? what did you tell them

Thank you for the welcome Angelina. It is nice to talk with adult females on this topic.

I took the measurement based on their clothing sizes. If they don't fit properly I will order new ones. Money is not an issue.

I agree about the idea of a deal. I am in control of significant financial assets for some many years to come. This may help.

Joh

Angelina that was not a grammatical error, because in the second post you do it again. i think as long as @Laura does not forbid me i can write with whom and what i want and @Jenna and others may decide for themselves if they want to read my opinion or not. i find these two posts unacceptable and disrespectful

I think what Avery meant is also my point of view about the past situation.

Angelina first i would talk to both of them, maybe you can convince them with your arguments, if not you can of course try to talk them into a deal, so that you give them something in return if they wear the belts.

At that state of the discussion Jennas situation was like a room with many closed doors and she didn't know which one would be the right one to be successful. More or less we tried to convince her not to go trough any door at all. Your comment, at this time, was as you would have open one door and showed the way which would be likely successful.
Averys comment was meant to prevent Jenna to go through that door. I also thought at that time this was not a good advice for the nieces but a good one for Jenna.

Joh

Jenna However the older niece turns 18 in a few weeks.

If she 18 years old she can decide for herself.

Laura

Jenna However the older niece turns 18 in a few weeks.

Then your are safe to belt her after few weeks. I would go this way

Joh This is then blackmail and against the law

Not really

Angelina

Joh We had already discuss it their nieces are not in the position to oversee the consequences it will have.

then the consequences have to be discussed openly, but if they don't talk about it you can of course use this argument

Jenna I agree about the idea of a deal. I am in control of significant financial assets for some many years to come. This may help.

that would be more like putting pressure on and the big one will certainly get financial control herself when she is 18, i was thinking more about the fact that you might be able to finance your driver's license and car if they wear the belt or something like this

Joh

Jenna I agree about the idea of a deal. I am in control of significant financial assets for some many years to come. This may help.

This is then blackmail and against the law.

Laura

Jenna I took the measurement based on their clothing sizes

Clothing sizes are not enough. You must measure few things when the girls are naked

Jenna That can lead to other things though, like premarital sex, which I want to avoid at all costs

What do you care about? Premarital sex or masturbation?

audioguy58

Jenna I am in control of significant financial assets for some many years to come.

That’s the best possible situation to be in if you want to keep them in their belts past the age of 18.

Jenna

Laura I like this idea Laura, talk about options like a car, new clothes, etc. in exchange for belting. She will be 18 and free to make her own decision. Purse strings are a powerful weapon

Joh

Laura Not really

I agree we will not agree.
The best is to ask a lawyer.
@Jenna You should be aware that your decision may come back to you later when your nieces are independent and hold you accountable if it was against the law.

I don't see any problem if your nieces masturbate. May be you should change your view.

Jenna

Angelina Thank you Angelina for your input. I have seen your posts on other topics and appreciate your input.