Max9 I hate feeling tied down. I have no idea how Pru gets to that calm place when she's locked up. My mother would lock me in my room as a teenager to get me to pray or if I skipped church or because I wore pants. Losing control like that does not feel fun. She told Pru that she would have belted me through college if she knew it was possible, and that chills me. She didn't want me to be a slut in college, which to be honest I sort of was, and she thinks she will be held responsible by god for the fact I gave up the church. She still thinks my masturbating is a sin. I was never one for authority. I still feel a little weird being in charge of Pru, but it works for her and I'm glad to make her happy. The idea of punishing someone else and locking them up is hard for me and it took a while to get used to. The idea of being locked up by anyone else is even worse. Honestly, wearing a belt for a couple of days is not that big a deal to me. It's that I'm pretty sure it's the start of something bigger that I'm not ready to deal with.
