Telling others about your belt

Joh

Sara2001 Of course he first needs to be found

This will be difficult because he has to accept the fact that your faster is breaking the law. Your father and sister also expect he will not tell anybody about it. This is a lot they expect from someone who will have an equal right relation.
From my point of view it is impossible.

Angelina

Vanessa ..Especially as they're now sure it's secure,and that I can't cheat on it.

that's exactly how it is for me too

Vanessa Without touching her belt,her bra and her thigh bands,it is reduced;however...

I would say that is not possible

Vanessa Does it work in your case?

it is difficult, but most of the time it works, except when we are in bed, because then she has direct contact with my equipment.

Joh This is a lot they expect from someone who will have an equal right relation.
From my point of view it is impossible.

in my experience it is possible if it is true love 🙂

Joh

Angelina in my experience it is possible if it is true love

Maybe because Camryn is a girl. Men tend to stand up for the girlfriend, especially when they are in puberty.

Sara2001

Angelina I would say that is not possible

There is a difference between touching on accident because it's not possible otherwise or playing with the equipment on purpose.

Angelina in my experience it is possible if it is true love

I hope she will find a good boyfriend who loves her enough to accept this.

Vanessa

Sara2001 Me, too.

Most of us too,I think...

Sara2001 Why should he not be able to ignore it enough that it is not a permanent topic.

In this way I agree,it is possible to not make it a permanent topic.I guessed it should be totally ignored,which would not be possible.

Sara2001 It's still planning that I wear my equipment as long as possible

Sorry for you...

Sara2001 Her fights are normal and acceptable, but he should not fight on a regular basis with her.

So,she's allowed to fight it,but her boyfriend,not?Even if he fights it like her,so no tools,etc...?

Angelina I would say that is not possible

I thinks so,too.

Angelina it is difficult, but most of the time it works, except when we are in bed, because then she has direct contact with my equipment.

Good if it works!🙂

Sara2001 I hope she will find a good boyfriend who loves her enough to accept this.

It would make it harder for her,however.

Angelina our partners should love us as people and the body is a bonus after the wedding 😀

I don't think it can easily be not taken onto account,however.

Joh If he accept the situation and is fine with it it is more likely he inclines to a dominant relation.

Not necessarily.He may understand it can't change it now,and accept it to make it easier for his girlfriend.

Angelina i doubt it somewhat

Me too.Especially if she guess he would not know she's lying,and can avoid a punishment this way.

Angelina

Joh Men tend to stand up for the girlfriend, especially when they are in puberty.

so does my girlfriend, but she thinks beforehand whether it makes sense in certain situations or whether it would put me in a worse situation.

Sara2001 There is a difference between touching on accident because it's not possible otherwise or playing with the equipment on purpose.

i know, i know this difference myself, but how should your father notice this difference?

Sara2001 I hope she will find a good boyfriend who loves her enough to accept this.

if not, in my opinion, it is not true love. our partners should love us as people and the body is a bonus after the wedding 😃

Sara2001

Angelina i know, i know this difference myself, but how should your father notice this difference?

By asking her. We are not allowed to lie about anything.

Joh

Angelina so does my girlfriend, but she thinks beforehand whether it makes sense in certain situations or whether it would put me in a worse situation.

She is a girl and she is younger than you.
My answer is still valid. It is a lot what he expect from a boy which has an equal right relation in his mind.
If he accept the situation and is fine with it it is more likely he inclines to a dominant relation.

Angelina

Sara2001 By asking her. We are not allowed to lie about anything.

so if he asks your sister if her boyfriend has touched only her body or also her equipment inappropriately, would she answer honestly? i doubt it somewhat

Joh She is a girl and she is younger than you.

Joh My answer is still valid.

and my contradiction too, it has nothing to do with gender and very little to do with age. it depends on the character and even if camryn acts much more impulsively than i do, she thinks beforehand which actions are good for me/ for us.

Joh

Angelina it has nothing to do with gender and very little to do with age

Sorry, it has something to do with gender and age.
During puberty girls and boys develop differently and a lot is changing. Sometime you have the feeling they do not have a brain at all the other time they are very good with arguments and at the next day most is forgotten was was happen the last day. They can be emotional unstable and sensitive one day and and the other day cool at critical situation. Than you ask yourself is this the same person from yesterday?

Sara2001

Angelina so if he asks your sister if her boyfriend has touched only her body or also her equipment inappropriately, would she answer honestly? i doubt it somewhat

Yes, I think that she would most probably answer honestly. He will ask this question on a regular basis with more details. It's very difficult to keep a lie that long and she knows that she has to face severe consequences if she get caught. He will also talk with her boyfriend from time to time. I am sure my father will know it after a while.

Vanessa I guessed it should be totally ignored,which would not be possible.

Yes, that's impossible.

Vanessa Sorry for you...

I think I got used to the idea, I don't fear it anymore. It will be less strict then now, for example I will be able to do some sports again, because he will remove the chain for sport or wandering.

Vanessa It would make it harder for her,however

Definitely, but this is something she has to accept.

Vanessa Me too.Especially if she guess he would not know she's lying,and can avoid a punishment this way.

I would agree to this if it would be a one time question, but this would be more like a regular question to get a long time overview.

Angelina

Joh Sometime you have the feeling they do not have a brain at all the other time they are very good with arguments

this is not due to puberty but to the partly wrong upbringing of the parents. if a boy or girl has been brought up well, he/she is also able to think before acting during puberty.

Vanessa In this way I agree,it is possible to not make it a permanent topic.I guessed it should be totally ignored,which would not be possible.

I think so too and that is exactly how it is in my relationship.

Vanessa I don't think it can easily be not taken onto account,however.

of course it is not easy, but it is of course possible

Sara2001 Yes, I think that she would most probably answer honestly. He will ask this question on a regular basis with more details. It's very difficult to keep a lie that long and she knows that she has to face severe consequences if she get caught. He will also talk with her boyfriend from time to time. I am sure my father will know it after a while.

i thought about it again. i always have to be honest (but only when my father asks me). if my father asked me about it, i wouldn't be able to answer exactly because the boundaries are very blurred between "permitted" fighting and "unpermitted" fighting.

Sara2001 because he will remove the chain for sport or wandering.

but of course only when he's with you, right? 😉

Vanessa

Sara2001 He will ask this question on a regular basis with more details. It's very difficult to keep a lie that long and she knows that she has to face severe consequences if she get caught.

I agree,if he asks more details at each time,it would be hard for her to not contradict herself,and be caught.But I guess that,if she can answer well long enough,he trusts her and doesn't ask questions anymore...

Sara2001 He will also talk with her boyfriend from time to time.

So,they should be sure they tell the same things.And I guess he asks her boyfriend less often than her.

Sara2001 Yes, that's impossible.

We agree about it,so!

Sara2001 I don't fear it anymore

But not sad?

Sara2001 I will be able to do some sports again, because he will remove the chain for sport or wandering

Good part!

Sara2001 Definitely, but this is something she has to accept.

Or wait until she can leave,and follow her own rules.

Angelina of course it is not easy, but it is of course possible

Not all the time,I think.

Angelina if my father asked me about it, i wouldn't be able to answer exactly

How he would react?

Sara2001 in our family this counts as lying

In mine too.

Sara2001 For example when we are on a hiking trip, the chain would go back in place when we have a break somewhere, like a restaurant.

Even if for less than 1 hour,for example?

Sara2001

Angelina i thought about it again. i always have to be honest (but only when my father asks me). if my father asked me about it, i wouldn't be able to answer exactly because the boundaries are very blurred between "permitted" fighting and "unpermitted" fighting.

You are allowed to hide information, in our family this counts as lying. It's not important for us to understand exactly where the red line is. We explain what happened, my father decides about the consequences. It can never be a black and white thing because it is impossible to think about everything in advance. In 98% we know when we cross a line.

Angelina but of course only when he's with you, right?

I am not sure about the sport, maybe I am allowed to do it without he is present at all times, but basically he will only remove the chain when it is absolutely. For example when we are on a hiking trip, the chain would go back in place when we have a break somewhere, like a restaurant.

Joh

Angelina this is not due to puberty but to the partly wrong upbringing of the parents.

Sorry you are wrong. I have my own experience and ask different parents about their own. You can read books about puberty and you can see the cinemac "inside out".

Angelina

Sara2001 We explain what happened, my father decides about the consequences.

probably it would be similar for me, but i rather assume a situation where my father asks me and i can't lie when he asks if i did something forbidden to my equipment, i couldn't say it for sure

Sara2001 I am not sure about the sport, maybe I am allowed to do it without he is present at all times,

so at least in most situations only when he is there. And sports are more fun in pairs anyway 🙂

Joh You can read books about puberty

for most parents this is just an excuse because they are not able to educate their children sensibly. parents have become lazy and then call it unauthoritarian education.

Joh

Angelina for most parents this is just an excuse because they are not able to educate their children sensibly. parents have become lazy and then call it unauthoritarian education.

Now you sound just like the teenagers I deal with. They claim they know better than anyone else, even though they have no experience. You're still in the middle of puberty, you haven't raised any children, but you claim that almost everyone else is wrong.
Grow up, raise your kids and guide them through puberty and after they stand on their own two feet we can talk about it again.

Sara2001

Angelina so at least in most situations only when he is there. And sports are more fun in pairs anyway 🙂

Yes, wearing the tight bands will be the absolut standard. Not wearing them for sport or hiking or things like that will be the absolut exception.

Vanessa But I guess that,if she can answer well long enough,he trusts her and doesn't ask questions anymore...

Yes, but we are all raised in our family, that lying is a major incident. That's one of the most important red lines in our family.

Vanessa So,they should be sure they tell the same things.And I guess he asks her boyfriend less often than her.

I wouldn't risk that. The consequences will most probably very bad. In our family we have the rule that breaking a rule must never bring you any benefit.

I would expect that if they got caught after some time, they will be forbidden to spend private time in bed together or something like that. The longer they hide it, the much longer the punishment will stay in place.

Vanessa But not sad?

I wouldn't say sad. I can't describe it perfectly. Sometimes I feel that I will miss a lot because of wearing it for good, but then I think I will get something more valuable in return. But yes, I sometimes struggle with it.

Vanessa Even if for less than 1 hour,for example?

Yes, he will only take it of for as long as absolutely necessary. He said there will be no exceptions from this rule. I am not sure about sport, but besides this, I will most probably the tightbands 99,9% of the time.

Angelina

Joh

yes and no, i always try to see everything from a parent's point of view in all arguments from such topics. that means if i sound like a typical teenager in this discussion to you, i did everything wrong because i tried to write from a parent's point of view. 😂

Saintprudence

To address the original topic of this post: I’ve told very few people about my belting. My wife, her parents, my best friend, my wife’s best friend (and backup keyholder), a couple of others we really trust. I hate that I have to keep it secret but the world simply would not understand. It’s one of the reasons I kind of wish voluntary belt-wearing was an accepted thing; in my mind, it’s no different than my friend who vapes a lot. Like me, she is using a tool to prevent her from backsliding into a disgusting habit. But unlike me, her tool is socially acceptable.

it’s why finding forums that talk seriously about belting is so hard. They quickly become cesspools of pervs trying to get their jollies. It’s a big reason I appreciate how hard Laura works to minimize trolls here.

Joh

Angelina yes and no, i always try to see everything from a parent's point of view in all arguments from such topics. that means if i sound like a typical teenager in this discussion to you, i did everything wrong because i tried to write from a parent's point of view

🤣 🤣 Well meant is not well done.

Angelina

Joh 🤣 🤣 Well meant is not well done.

it seems so yes 😂

Vanessa Not all the time,I think.

It doesn't need to, as long as it works in general.

Vanessa How he would react?

i don't know, he would probably take the question back. he would never put me in a situation where i didn't know if i was lying to him.

Sara2001 Yes, wearing the tight bands will be the absolut standard. Not wearing them for sport or hiking or things like that will be the absolut exception.

doesn't sound nice to me, but it's your life 😉

Sara2001 I wouldn't say sad. I can't describe it perfectly. Sometimes I feel that I will miss a lot because of wearing it for good, but then I think I will get something more valuable in return. But yes, I sometimes struggle with it.

it's a tough process, you have to weigh what's more important to you and then decide. i'm just afraid that if you wear the chastity equipment for the next 10 years, for example, and then change your mind, daniel won't go along with that decision

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