Should only females get belted?

Angelina

Max9 It would be totally unfair of course to have such a social law ... because then females were able to masturbate. So for cost efficience it would be better that way, but for fairness both would have to wear full gear... just that it would be umfair on a different level then, because the females would have to wear more equipment.

well, i'm glad there are no laws about this, it would be terrible if strangers (i.e. the state) were allowed to decide). 😂

Joh But if she going to stay a virgin the belt is not necessary.

But if shel wants it, the belt can be an auxiliary tool.

Joh What kind if relation is it if she is not able to trust her daughter?

sexuality is only one point. it's like with my father, he doesn't trust me on sexuality either, but in general he trusts me very much.

Joh

Angelina But if shel wants it, the belt can be an auxiliary tool.

Yes, it can be but for me it looks like to take sledgehammer to crack a nut.

Angelina sexuality is only one point. it's like with my father, he doesn't trust me on sexuality either, but in general he trusts me very much.

Than he should learn to trust you with your sexuality as well.
If you have proven to your father that you stand by your decisions and are trustworthy then this applies to all areas. You don't change your personality when it comes to that.

Vanessa

Joh

I agree.

Ines

Don't you think cages are easier to hide?

At least,only pants should be adapted to hide it.

MaximeJourennes

It seems easier for my twin to hide it.

Max9 makes it fair that women wear more equipment for the sake of equality.

Hum...No!😉

Chastity belts are enough...

Angelina But if shel wants it, the belt can be an auxiliary tool.

However,it seems it is @HHelen who wants it,not her daughter.

HHelen I do not see the benefits sufficient to use.

There is not much,you're right.

Joh This would be a good starting point for your negotiations to show him that you always are the same person and trustworthy.

Right.

HHelen Every parent would try to do it.

I don't think so.

GoodyProctor

She has accepted to wear a belt presently,like her daughter!😉

Ines it is a very bad thing

Or nor.I'm not virgin and don't truly regret it.

I only think that to be virgin on the wedding night is very romantic(even if it is not the best idea,as it would mean pain and blood during the wedding night,too,if virgin...).

Jen Deciding this for myself is also deciding I won't have a pure guy.

Does it matter for you or not that much?

Angelina i'll try to explain with my example. for my father, it's not the end of the world if i lose my virginity, it's about who i lose it to.

Why he doesn't unlock your belt when you're alone with your girlfriend,so?

GoodyProctor I figure at least crossed her mind a few times.

🤣

Angelina

Joh Yes, it can be but for me it looks like to take sledgehammer to crack a nut.

good comparison, now i have images in my head again 😂

Joh Than he should learn to trust you with your sexuality as well.
If you have proven to your father that you stand by your decisions and are trustworthy then this applies to all areas. You don't change your personality when it comes to that.

i understand what you mean but my father thinks in areas. there are areas in which he trusts me 100%, there are areas in which he trusts me to a limited extent and areas in which he does not trust me at all. unfortunately, sexuality belongs to the last.

HHelen I do not see the benefits sufficient to use.

😃

HHelen

Angelina so you have finally decided against thighbands and bra ?

I do not see the benefits sufficient to use.

GoodyProctor Alternately, why not let her out of the belt and forget this whole thing?

Because I want her to remain virgin and unlike your mother I found out about chastity belts in time.

GoodyProctor I feel like you're asking a little much by expected her to stay belted through college.

What's wrong with it?

GoodyProctor

HHelen What's wrong with it?

A college senior locked by her mom in a belt she can't remove? Sounds pretty transgressive to me.

HHelen Because I want her to remain virgin and unlike your mother I found out about chastity belts in time.

I would ask what's the harm in losing virginity when you're on your own in life, but the answers are probably self-explanatory.

Laura

GoodyProctor Sounds pretty transgressive to me.

Especially your mom would have done the same 😂

HHelen

GoodyProctor A college senior locked by her mom in a belt she can't remove?

First of all she is a unwed daughter.

GoodyProctor I would ask what's the harm in losing virginity when you're on your own in life

And if she is still single? I think " the answers are self-explanatory".

GoodyProctor I'm still paying off the loans from state school, but it's way too late for mother to offer that for a belt.

And it wasn't too late in my case, because I pay.

GoodyProctor But I also know that if I'd consented to the belt then, I probably would have stayed in it until marriage

Every parent would try to do it.

GoodyProctor

Laura Especially your mom would have done the same 😂

Almost certainly. My mother wasn't so abusive that she would have considered it for me as a teen. She was and is very law-abiding. But I'm absolutely sure she means it when she says she would have tried to belt me for college if she thought it was an option. This would have kept me under her roof in school, too. At the time I might have even accepted it if the price was right. Private college is expensive! And I ended up putting myself through state school so I wouldn't have to live with their rules. I'm still paying off the loans from state school, but it's way too late for mother to offer that for a belt. But I also know that if I'd consented to the belt then, I probably would have stayed in it until marriage, and it would have been a miserable marriage to some boring catholic man. Without college I wouldn't have really known what a lesbian even was. All my sex ed came from Catholic teaching. I think about a world where I'm married to a man who believes all the church stuff about men having authority in the house and he gets the keys on our wedding day, and it just makes me sick to my stomach for real.

Joh

Angelina i understand what you mean but my father thinks in areas

This would be a good starting point for your negotiations to show him that you always are the same person and trustworthy.

Angelina

Joh This would be a good starting point for your negotiations to show him that you always are the same person and trustworthy.

but that doesn't change anything, he makes his decisions dependent on it because the areas change not because i change. according to your logic i agree with you, but my father doesn't think that way.

Ines Obviously it is not, for a lot of people, however, it is a very bad thing in the life of that girl.

i'll try to explain with my example. for my father, it's not the end of the world if i lose my virginity, it's about who i lose it to.

GoodyProctor

HHelen And if she is still single? I think " the answers are self-explanatory".

If you lose your virginity when you're single, then you lose your virginity. It's not the end of the world. And like I said in the other thread, if you don't learn what you want in the world, then your most likely marriage is a mundane one of quiet desperation.

HHelen Every parent would try to do it.

I hope that's not the case. I may not be a parent but I'm probably older than you and I do know my way around the world. And just about nobody is actually using chastity belts in college outside this group. (And I have my doubts about the validity of this group, but I play along.)

GoodyProctor

HHelen Every parent would try to do it.

Would you have accepted being locked in a belt by your parents when you were about to make your way in the world?

Joh

HHelen Every parent would try to do it.

No. Some parents try it.

GoodyProctor I hope that's not the case. I may not be a parent but I'm probably older than you and I do know my way around the world. And just about nobody is actually using chastity belts in college outside this group. (And I have my doubts about the validity of this group, but I play along.)

I fully agree with you and this is also my experience.

GoodyProctor

HHelen First of all she is a unwed daughter.

One additional note: you said this to correct me when I called her a college senior. Isn't this a little dehumanizing? A woman in her 20s with her body parts treated like property by her mom? I mean, forget transgressive, this is some old-time medieval stuff, you know? It's not like the days when women's virginity was a valuable prize to be traded off to some man for a good marriage match. Unless that's what it is to you?

Ines

GoodyProctor If you lose your virginity when you're single, then you lose your virginity. It's not the end of the world.

Obviously it is not, for a lot of people, however, it is a very bad thing in the life of that girl.

Jen

GoodyProctor if you don't learn what you want in the world, then your most likely marriage is a mundane one of quiet desperation.

Dating, kissing, holding - surely this is enough to work out what you like.

Ines it is a very bad thing in the life of that girl.

There's a side to this I'm struggling with. With the way people now are, it makes the chance of meeting someone pure almost zero. Like if dating and having a boyfriend now, maybe you could have a night which is both your first time. But waiting till older, none, literally none, of the guys will be virgin. Deciding this for myself is also deciding I won't have a pure guy.

Laura

GoodyProctor If you lose your virginity when you're single, then you lose your virginity. It's not the end of the world.

But it's a shame for you

GoodyProctor but I'm probably older than you

👅

HHelen

GoodyProctor It's not like the days when women's virginity was a valuable prize to be traded off to some man for a good marriage match.

And it's another reason for belting.

GoodyProctor Would you have accepted being locked in a belt by your parents when you were about to make your way in the world?

Yes, but I would have bargained more.

GoodyProctor One of the reasons I'm so uncomfortable at the idea of belting in college is that my mother had a very specific plan for me in life, and I skipped pretty much all of it. There's a saying in the midwest: "women go to college to get their M.R.S. degree." I was supposed to go to college, find a nice christian man, marry, and start making babies by the time I was 21. Obviously I had different plans.

Well said. It's enlightens all my concerns @Angelina and @Vanessa ask about.

Joh

Jen Deciding this for myself is also deciding I won't have a pure guy.

What is bad about it?

My first girlfriend had experience and it was great. Their was no rush or no embarrassing situation. She told me her first time was also with a man with experience and he was kind, patient and lovely.
And by the way I was end of twenty and was the last of all my mates. I know some young man beginning twenty the are still a virgin. And it looks like they are not in a rush.

If you really believe the first time will be the best time in your live if it for him also the first time it could be a disappointment. Their is no guaranty for that.
Beside of that if it really the best experience why should you have sex afterward? It will than always disappointing. 😉 😂

Ines

Jen literally none, of the guys will be virgin.

I see it different for the boys.

Jen

Joh it's not about the first time, it's all the times. Only having that type of intemacy with a single person. It's a special thing you share together and nobody else in the world gets to have it.

Joh My first girlfriend had experience

There have been others yes?
Do you remember the first time with others as well as well as you remember the first of all?
I'm asking how clearly you remember, not how good it was.

Yes this is what my parents say, but it's the bits which make sense and I want too.

GoodyProctor her lack of experience bugs her

Is it her lack of experience or the difference between you that bugs her?
@Saintprudence 🙋☝️☝️ when you're allowed back

GoodyProctor

Laura But it's a shame for you

I don't know. I had plenty of sex in college and I never felt bad about it, then or now! That's one of the differences between Pru and I. She's only had a few sex partners and I'm a lot more experienced, and her lack of experience bugs her sometimes, but also I was ready in my 30s to just settle down with a nice girl and make a life together and not get too frisky with anyone else.

Laura

GoodyProctor I don't know. I had plenty of sex in college and I never felt bad about it

Then it's your mother's fault

Joh

Jen It's a special thing you share together and nobody else in the world gets to have it.

I agree. It is special every time I am with a women the first time.

Jen There have been others yes?

Yes, some.

Jen Do you remember the first time with others as well as well as you remember the first of all?
I'm asking how clearly you remember, not how good it was.

I remember the latest "first time" best.
But I have to admit that I don't have such a good memory. Older things fade.

Saintprudence

Jen Is it her lack of experience or the difference between you that bugs her?

I don’t mind Goody’s level of experience. I’m glad she’s enjoyed herself! My worry is that I feel like I missed out on most of my 20s because I was crippled by guilt over sex. A belt comes off eventually but guilt is forever.

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