Avery
I would say that to the extent that a body of believers departs from the original dogmatic teachings of Christ, they have left Jesus.
If you venerate the Church and the Altar, it shows deep down you believe. You have intellectual pride at your age but deep down you know that the Holy Spirit is God coeternal with Father and Son. Trust me I believed the same thing when I was your age. The reality of Christ uproots pride and that’s why people avoid it.
In the early Church, there was a large split over the issue of the Divinity of Christ (the Arian controversy, pertaining to the Bishop Arius not white people). The debate was never over the authenticity of the text of the 4 canonical Gospels. Matthew Mark Luke and John are faithful witnesses and it is considered a weighty sin in Judaism to prophecy falsely. The claim that the Church corrupted the text is unlikely to be true. It seems like you have gone so far as to throw out the textual tradition.
Again, I encourage you to read the life stories of the Saints of the Church and you will realize they were genuinely humble men/women and not power hungry. Many Bishops who became Saints were simple monks and hermits who had attained blessed dispassion and prayer for the world. The Church appointed them for her own sake. They had no desire to rule over anyone and many fled into the forests to continue in blessed dispassion and prayer for the world. They worked miracles when it was required of them, but their true joy was to abide in the illumination of the Holy Spirit and in freedom from the passions (Passions came through the fall of Adam, healed by repentance/baptism).
