Belt fitting

Avery

Joh Ok. If I understand you right because it was not your fault to lose your virginity, you are still a virgin.

I think I want to cease and desist here. People have varying views on this whole virginity issue, what it is and why it's important or not and I want to respect those.

Joh

Avery I think I want to cease and desist here. People have varying views on this whole virginity issue, what it is and why it's important or not and I want to respect those.

Of course we have different views on this here. That's perfectly fine and everyone is allowed to keep their convictions.
I only asked because I didn't understand you and I'm interested in how you see it.

Jen

Avery I could kind of see a boy objecting if you had done stuff with lots of others but just playing with yourself should probably get a pass

I think about what it means for me not for my future guy - he might not even care🤷‍♀️. I haven't talked about it much but my toy was I think bigger than the average guy and it would be sad to be disappointed when it finally happened.

carg I think 'ruined' is too big a word, since that suggests that it is permanent, while I think that at least the majority of your negative feelings will be temporary.

I didn't want to answer this while upset - I'm trying to write this clear. I think the not having sex, not masturbating, not having orgasms - like it's just an idea. It's the doing it that makes it a real thing - and I hadn't even really committed to it but yeah it was feeling real and yeah ruined was the right word. Like the idea is still there - I can start again - but the doing is a real thing that can be ruined otherwise it wouldn't be special.

Avery

Jen my toy was I think bigger than the average guy and it would be sad to be disappointed when it finally happened.

Good point!

Joh

Jen it would be sad to be disappointed when it finally happened.

This is one way.
If you stop for a few weeks before you are with him for the first time, you will not be disappointed. Especially if you have longed for it for a long time without any release.

Jonas

Jen Like the idea is still there - I can start again - but the doing is a real thing that can be ruined otherwise it wouldn't be special.

The word ruined comes from your mother I think and links to the negative feelings/experience at the start of all this.
As you know; I think that chastity does have to be maintained to be something special, but for me it has to be a positive choice, yeah it gets tough on times, (hence b^stard belts) but overall it has to be what you (not anyone else) wants.

Angelina

youdontknowme There is also the tiny issue that nobody else uses that sort of terminological distinction, chastity means different things to different people and abstinence can mean a lot more than just "partial chastity", for lack of a better term.

yes that's right. then i will only make it clear for my statements that chastity does not mean sexual pleasure and abstinence "only" means no sex. but then that only applies to my posts 😉

Jen like it's just an idea. It's the doing it that makes it a real thing

however, ruined would be the wrong word. you are too hard on yourself. you are still relatively new to belt experience and should not put too much pressure on yourself. 🙂

Vanessa

Avery

Good luck!

I think you would manage it.

Jen focusing on the wearing side, not the chastity side

I think it is logical,especially if you put it back on recently.

Jen more than just serious

Why not until engaged,so?

Jonas

I think so,too.

Angelina second virgin

Yes,we used it several times.

Angelina i now believe that there are more than just these two forms 😉

Yes,but it is better to not have too many possibilities,for each wearer.

And these two have pretty clear meanings.

youdontknowme Not drinking is a form of abstinence, so is not masturbating.

Yes,but the context would often explain what kind of abstinence we talk about.

youdontknowme having sex with your partner but nobody else can be chastity.

Personally,I think it is not chastity.

Jen I think the not having sex, not masturbating, not having orgasms - like it's just an idea. It's the doing it that makes it a real thing - and I hadn't even really committed to it but yeah it was feeling real and yeah ruined was the right word.

If I understand,after your two weeks test,you" failed"?

If yes,no problem,it is totally logical you don't manage it on the first try.

There could be some others "fails",but it would not mean you would not manage it after some time.

Angelina chastity does not mean sexual pleasure and abstinence "only" means no sex

Similar meaning for me.

Avery

Vanessa Good luck!

I think you would manage it.

Thank you.

Angelina

Vanessa Yes,but it is better to not have too many possibilities,for each wearer.

And these two have pretty clear meanings.

that's right, i'll continue to try to apply it that way. if someone doesn't want to be divided into these two groups, he/she can write to me

carg I hope you will have the opportunity to take a longer break from the belt after you got your license, if you still like that idea, although I assume your mother would still like you to stay belted, and might come up with a tempting proposal (like being able to borrow the car - even after your license you will need to keep practicing).

i don't think that should matter for the time being. i think @Jen should experiment a bit without her parents after she gets her driving licence, so that no pressure can arise in any form. later she can talk about deals etc. again.

Jen

Sin come back to it when you want.. and you will!

This stuck in my head like it's a grass is greener on the other side thing. Only 6 days ago is weird feels ages ago.

carg

Jen

Let me see if I have understood your situation correctly; please correct me if I got it wrong:
2 days after your 2-week trial ended, you started wearing the belt again, to be able to get driving lessons. You're wearing it for 12 hours per day on average, and are not attempting to stay chaste when it is off.

I still think 'ruined' is too strong, because you did a test of limited duration, not a full-out commitment. Only when you really decide to go for it, failure becomes a possibility. But I get the impression that you still find it too hard / scary to make a longer-term decision, so you're taking it as it comes. I can understand that, and you definitely shouldn't rush such an important choice, but the price of not deciding will be the nagging doubts ('grass greener on the other side'). And perhaps it is even better not to make that choice until you know what your life will be like after you finish secondary/high school (or however that is called in Australia).
I hope you will have the opportunity to take a longer break from the belt after you got your license, if you still like that idea, although I assume your mother would still like you to stay belted, and might come up with a tempting proposal (like being able to borrow the car - even after your license you will need to keep practicing).

Jen

I asked mum for a pass tonight because like it's Christmas but she's still all obsessive making it normal like it's just normal to wear over night no reason not to tonight. Like whatever I don't care it's fine to wear but she - like I just want to make my own decision not have her pressuring me I just want space

carg

Jen

To me it sounds like it is time to once more make clear to your mother that you are still the one in charge of your belt-wearing, and so I'd say you should take the pass if you want to. If you give in now, it will probably be harder next time you want to go against her wishes.
Of course that might mean that your driving lessons are not happening for a few days (I believe the deal was that you'd need to have worn the belt for at least 4 days before you could have a lesson?), so then you'll have to ask yourself if that is worth it for you. But I hope it will not come to that, and your mother will once more respect you going at your own pace.

Jonas

Jen Trouble is without encouragement from keyholder, the question can drag on and on and the decision to wear never ends up getting made.
Think about it, if you were keyholder in this situation, would you remove the belt "'cos it's Xmas?"

Renita

Jen I asked mum for a pass tonight because like it's Christmas but she's still all obsessive making it normal like it's just normal to wear over night no reason not to tonight.

Did she take it off finally?

Jonas Think about it, if you were keyholder in this situation, would you remove the belt "'cos it's Xmas?"

Of course not. I even didn't ask.

Jen

carg I didn't worry was just venting mostly sorry 😆 wasn't a big deal but it was on my mind like it was a weird Christmas anyway with just the 3 of us and wearing the belt it was awkward like at the beginning again

HHelen

Jen it was a weird Christmas anyway with just the 3 of us and wearing the belt

What's wrong with it?

Jonas

Renita Jonas Think about it, if you were keyholder in this situation, would you remove the belt "'cos it's Xmas?"

Of course not. I even didn't ask.

Exactly. I think users should always try to imagine themselves in the keyholder role. When I do this, I immediately understand that my belt should be locked on to me at all times, checked regularly, and that my frustration is irrelevant to the job in hand... preserving my chastity.

Jen

Renita Did she take it off finally?

I wore it the normal over night took it off before lunch.

Renita Of course not. I even didn't ask.

Yeah I'm not wearing it so seriously but yeah I'm thinking about it and about new year. Like I don't want it to be a game it's not supposed to be a game but kind of is now its like how far can i push myself but not serious

Angelina

Jonas Exactly. I think users should always try to imagine themselves in the keyholder role.

reminds me of the chastity experiment with my girlfriend. I think it really brought me something to put myself in the role of the keyholder, even if I almost burst because of my dual role 😂

@Jen

Since I wasn't in the forum for a while, I tried to sort everything you wrote, but somehow I don't quite understand it. So far you have worn the belt for your driving lessons, wasn't that the deal? What exactly are you thinking about, what do you want to achieve with the belt? if you want to wear the belt without breaks hand in the keys, if you want to wear the belt with breaks hand in the keys and say when you want them again, but you have to be clear about what you want and when you have a goal you are not allowed to have the keys during this time. I hope you understand my slight confusion 😂

Jen

HHelen What's wrong with it?

We normally travel to be with more family but covid

Renita

Jen I wore it the normal over night took it off before lunch.

X-mas lunch without the belt and then put it back?

« Previous Page Next Page »