Advice for potential new Keyholders

Milord

Kaja I dont think that Im bad girl or bad person because I used all my holes and because I love sex and masturbation.

You aren't. A good person is not defined by this. Helping others, be honest, keeping your word, care for the people you love, make you a good person.

Kaja

Kaja And no Im not addicted my familly or friends dont have bad minds about me, my vagina and anus are not loose, my palms are not hairy and my eyes work still same 😀.

youdontknowme

Kaja But when I have bf I was never misconduct.

I dont think that Im bad girl or bad person because I used [...]

If you do not engage in behavior you would hide from your partners, and you never act non-consensually, I do not think your sexual acts are in any way immoral. I believe your worst characteristic is your habit of resorting to vulgarity whenever you are met with disagreement.

Kaja Sasha "Slutty" behavior is not startong point of worse actions.

I am inclined to agree with two little caveats:

1) It may be a symptom of larger tendencies towards unruly behavior. That explains some of the stigma, but controlling that symptom will not fix the underlying problem, only hide parts of it.

2) it may make the slutty person popular in social circles that are prone to reckless behavior. I suspect that is one of the issues Sasha faced (a pregnancy scare seems much more likely if she and her partners were not, or improperly, using protection). Obviously someone like you who is cautious about protection does not fall into that category, but considering what we heard of Jane, I am not too confident she thinks everything through.

Sasha

Kaja That wasn’t what I was getting at, sorry for any misunderstanding.
My point was that if all her mom is doing is attempting to control that behavior, without her seeing it as a problem, it’s only going to get worse from there.
If you choose to have sex safely and enjoy it there’s nothing wrong there obviously, we all live by our own standards of course

Milord

Sasha
I see a great misunderstanding here.
It seems to me that all deviant behavior passes through sex, so controlling, limiting, and removing it will stop bad behavior. My living experience tells me that this is hardly the case (personal experience, no scientific or statistical truth here). Most came from rebellion from the oppressive environment, mental distress, even having been victim of abuse, and a lot of other things that will push people into destruction path. I don't mean to exclude destructive sex from the picture, but it's just one, not the only one, and not even the worst one. Unfortunately, I have some friends who destroyed their lives, and no sex has been involved in their fall.

curious

Kaja
Just because YOUR moral mindset finds your behaviour perfectly acceptable, other people might have different moral standards and find exactly the same behaviour completely unacceptable and slutty.

If you do not want to be judged, you should refrain from judging other people!

Try to be more tolerant. You do not need to always project what you consider right or wrong onto other people. When in other families unmarried sex is considered not acceptable, that is what they consider right for them. They do not ask you to be more chaste, so you have no right to ask other people not to follow their moral standards und use the tools available to achieve their goals (i. e. belts).

WriterAlexis

curious

other people might have different moral standards

I would generally agree with that.

This is why I am asking @Jenna to explain her morality and the reasoning behind it, so its merit can be discussed.

Kaja

curious Im tolerant. I never force anybody to have sex.

The other "gang" is the intolerant. It is the same like with abortions. Im for sexual rights for everybody. But it is on you if you will use it.

One side want freedom od choise for everybody (they dont push anybody to do it but they give you the right), the opposite wants to forbid it for everybody (in theyr minds anybody can not do it). So who is intolerant? Who part?

Kaja

curious And where is connection with my message?

Milord

curious
@Kaja never attacked anyone for their moral standards. Everyone has the right to have a different moral ideas and principles
She talks against the ones who enforce their belief on others that seems reluctant and don't share the same belief. This is coercion.
By the way the whole forum share the idea that belting someone can be done only if the belted one is totally consentual. Otherwise its abuse.

youdontknowme

WriterAlexis I also agree with the sentiment. Which is why I am very interested in whether Jane's moral standards are being considered by Monica (and, by extension, Jenna).

WriterAlexis

Kaja

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance#:~:text=The%20paradox%20of%20tolerance%20states,practice%20of%20tolerance%20with%20them.

curious

Kaja

You neglect that this is a topic where parents are trying to pass on certain values to their children. You cannot start from your position, that a girl should be free to have whatever kind of sex she likes in this situation. And that is exactly where you are wrong.
If you talk to your peers, then yes, your argument would be valid.
But not when you are actually denying a parent the right to say "I want my children to grow up learning these values" and you argue that these values are wrong and children should just follow what you feel is right (total sexual freedom).

WriterAlexis

Kaja

I would like to borrow your lifestyle for a trice.

Kaja

WriterAlexis You are welcome. Im interested in your story. I want try it for some (small) time too.

Kaja

WriterAlexis Thats interesting. I never hear about it.

Angelina

I also think the new deal between Jane and Monica won't work because it ignores the problem (and because it's actually the same deal that failed the first attempt). Maybe the two need to try to work with each other and not against each other. If Jane doesn't trust Monica, then the chastity belt isn't a solution anyway. Even if Monica forces Jane to cwear it, there is no trust and no improvement.
Point 1: Is Jane interested in a relationship with the boy? If that's the case, almost all of Jane's problems have become obsolete
Point 2: Monica isn't being honest herself, she abused the meeting with Jenna and Susan to trick Jane into getting her measured (and I'm sure she didn't even mention thigh bands beforehand). If she expects honesty from her daughter, she has to start doing it herself.
Point 3: Sasha recognized this correctly, Jane must first see for herself that she has problems, only then can the belt become part of the solution, otherwise there will be no voluntary wearing of it

WriterAlexis

Angelina

Point 1: Is Jane interested in a relationship with the boy? If that's the case, almost all of Jane's problems have become obsolete

It is possible that it is a boy Monica does not approve of.

Kaja

WriterAlexis But it is not her boy. It is not her jobs. Thanks god (non-existent 😀) parents are not never necesary to authorize marriage.

Angelina

WriterAlexis It is possible that it is a boy Monica does not approve of.

That could be the case, but then Monica has the problem and not Jane. As I understand it, the whole thing was about Jane's bad behavior. Dating a guy Monica doesn't like may not be nice for her, but it's not a problem Jane has

curious You cannot start from your position, that a girl should be free to have whatever kind of sex she likes in this situation.

In theory, a girl has this right, even against the wishes of her parents, as long as she does not commit any criminal acts. Morally, I think some practices are wrong and I would tell my children that too

curious Ask @Angelina, now that she is free I am sure she will agree that she has not suffered any lasting damage.

That's right, but I couldn't have any sexual activity for 4 1/2 years even though I would have liked to have had some and had the right to do so. Not everything that doesn't hurt is right

WriterAlexis

Kaja

parents are not never necesary to authorize marriage.

That has not historically been the case, and in many cultures and parts of the world, still is not the case.

Kaja

WriterAlexis But now you can love and married who you wants. It is big victory of freedom and inteligence.

Kaja

curious It is the same like push (or forbide) your child to be vegan, to go to church, to have pierced ears (or circumcision), to (not) wear some cloth or to take a babtism (or abortion), to marriage, to therapy of homosexuality or exorcism - you CAN NOT do it.
You can reccomend it, you can give advices, but you can not push it or force it.
All of it is abusive when you will use power

Kaja

curious Cildren are not your property. They have their rights. You can not do what you want with them. They are not your slaves or animals. They are people!

« Previous Page Next Page »