milkymilo
Which is a problem, only you do not see it as such.
So let me give another example:
There is a mental disirder called 'borderline personality'. Among other things, these patients frequently describe an emptiness. The feel nothing. So they start to engage in self-harming activities, e.g. cutting themselves. Now the at least feel pain which they feel is better than feeling nothing at all.
However, they of course know that harming themselves is not right and they are in that internal conflct between doing something to experience feelings but feeling guilty for doing this.
Now they discover bdsm and quickly figure out that in certain settings very sadistic people will actually cause severe enough pain so that they feel something. And instead of being told it is wrong to harm yourself, they receive praise for being very enduring. So they found a way to get hurt rather than hurting themselves and even being praised for this.
And instead of adressing the actual problem this goes on for years until other aspects of the borderline disorder come out stronger and stronger and they end up in psychiatric hospitals.
You see the connection?
If you know you have an issue, try not to normalise it by engaging in a life where what is a weakness is externally compensated. Try to address the issue and work on getting it resolved.
If you enjoy submissive behaviour, that is completely fine if the motivation is some kind of sexual turn on. But you should not 'misuse' these things because you have less issues with your disorder in such a setting.
