Free from CB

Jen

So topic - Free from CB - yeah I'm thinking of quitting. And I'm writing this now because I'm not annoyed or anxious or anything now. It's just like boring - like the belt doesn't excite me now - like nothing does it seems. So everything has been a bit crap the last week and schools cancelled again tomorrow cause they're worried about more rain. so yeah I'll stick with it a bit more just to see but it's not being like what I thought

Renita

Jen like nothing does it seems

Because you are not in relationship yet.

Joh

Jen And I'm writing this now because I'm not annoyed or anxious or anything now.

This is normal and you will find out in many different cases. Like a special food which tastes divinely good. If you eat it every day you will soon get used to it and it will become normal. Nothing special anymore.

Therein lies the danger for relationships. In the beginning it is super nice and special. Doing a lot of things together, having someone by your side for fun or when you want to lean on each other. With time it becomes natural and if you don't actively work on the relationship you will notice that you are distant from each other. The tingle is gone.

Megan

Jen It's just like boring - like the belt doesn't excite me now - like nothing does it seems. So everything has been a bit crap the last week and schools cancelled again tomorrow cause they're worried about more rain. so yeah I'll stick with it a bit more just to see but it's not being like what I thought

It's not an exciting game chastity is just clothes.
Ultimately you completely forget it is on you. My belt helps me ventilate and the bands on the back open when I sit down on the toilet and this makes it easier to go to the restroom. Sometimes so if I am home on a weekend unlocked with my husband I will put my belt back on just to make it easier to use toilet paper in the restroom and then take it back off and put some other clothes on before I return to my husband.

You can change but it isn't 'quitting' You don't have anything to worry about

carg

Jen For now, I assume this is mostly blowing off steam, and you are not really ready to stop wearing the belt. But there is a thing that you write that surprises me:

Jen It's just like boring - like the belt doesn't excite me now

I thought the whole idea was to have the belt help you with staying chaste, and that you'd even quit if it kept being more of a sex toy. Now it doesn't anymore, and then you want to give up?

It sounds to me more like you are a bit depressed, and just not enjoying things as much as usual, but should that have an effect on your striving to keep yourself chaste for your Mr. Right?

Jen

Megan It's not an exciting game chastity is just clothes.

Yeah it's like that now

carg
Angelina

Yeah you're both right it's about staying chaste but also - like clicking the lock was exciting, and other times too I got excited and my staying chaste promise was also about just accepting those feelings and knowing that I'm waiting. Sorry i think I'm rambling - what I mean is it wasn't frustrating any more but having those feelings wash over me was comforting and made my staying chaste feel real.

Angelina

Jen

You have my understanding and my respect for that, I don't think you're making this decision easy for yourself and you shouldn't either, wait a few more days and think again carefully because I find your decision understandable but a bit strange in one point.

You write that the belt bores you and that it's not as exciting as you thought, but the goal of chastity isn't that it's exciting, it's a personal attitude. if you don't have that it's better to stop, but if you do have that attitude then i find your reasoning a bit weak

James

Jen Sorry i think I'm rambling - what I mean is it wasn't frustrating any more but having those feelings wash over me was comforting and made my staying chaste feel real.

Jen, I do have to ask how much is the belt and how much is it being shifted from your normal flow?

Angelina

Jen

frankly i assume you lack the reason, maybe you would see it differently if you were in a relationship. keep the belt, maybe not for now but if you find a partner the tensions can re-emerge 😉

Jen yeah the whole world's depressing now - but like more reason distraction would be nice

could it be that your aversion to the belt comes from a depressive phase of your own? if so, better times will come again, try to be positive. 😃

Jen For me now - I promised myself so I'm continuing. And it's not stuffing up my life - if it was really becoming a negative I'd stop

so are you going on? sorry i thought you were stopping

Jen

James yeah the whole world's depressing now - but like more reason distraction would be nice

James

Jen yeah the whole world's depressing now - but like more reason distraction would be nice

Totally get that feeling, trust me. More collapse everywhere you look.

Avery

Jen So topic - Free from CB - yeah I'm thinking of quitting. And I'm writing this now because I'm not annoyed or anxious or anything now.

I'm in the same situation you are, part time wearer, chaste since last August. That's the real chaste, not being made a prisoner to do it.

Jen

Avery do you struggle with a reason to stick with it?

For me now - I promised myself so I'm continuing. And it's not stuffing up my life - if it was really becoming a negative I'd stop

Avery

Jen do you struggle with a reason to stick with it?

For me now - I promised myself so I'm continuing. And it's not stuffing up my life - if it was really becoming a negative I'd stop

Indeed I do struggle with it, fairly often the urge comes near to overpowering the desire to maintain a chaste lifestyle. I have to make it past those times and have devised a few strategies. In a pinch I put the belt on for a while, like lying in bed late at night. If I meet the right person though I'm going back to getting myself laid, married or now, so I needn't wait so long as some. Don't know how folks wait 'til the wedding.

Jen

Avery for me I think the point will be when we're ready to marry each other. But not wait until the actual wedding

Megan

Avery Don't know how folks wait 'til the wedding.

Yes you in fact do know how. I didn't have the keys LOL. 🤣
Also I didn't know how to masturbate so some slight feminine arousal didn't feel like it needed to be shut off.

Avery

Jen for me I think the point will be when we're ready to marry each other. But not wait until the actual wedding

A fine idea. No sense in torturing yourself. Or your partner.

Avery

Megan Also I didn't know how to masturbate so some slight feminine arousal didn't feel like it needed to be shut off.

Not masturbating is the toughest part. I did have a fail when I played touch and smile with my girl friend in the shower at the gym. That one I couldn't "shut off". Moral, don't touch anybody or let them touch you.

Raquel

Megan Also I didn't know how to masturbate so some slight feminine arousal didn't feel like it needed to be shut off.

It is exactly what my cousin says.
I can not say the same.... It is a bit harder for me.

Jen So topic - Free from CB - yeah I'm thinking of quitting. And I'm writing this now because I'm not annoyed or anxious or anything now. It's just like boring - like the belt doesn't excite me now - like nothing does it seems. So everything has been a bit crap the last week and schools cancelled again tomorrow cause they're worried about more rain. so yeah I'll stick with it a bit more just to see but it's not being like what I thought

You should do what makes you happiest in that regard.
I feel a little identified with you since I think that in those cases a mother who knows what it's like to go through that could help us, but neither you nor I have it, and, even, in that sense you are more alone.

Jen

Angelina so are you going on? sorry i thought you were stopping

Still chaste since 2021😁
Yeah I've had thoughts but still going for now

Sin

Jen Still chaste since 2021

OMG you go girl! Three months is huge.

Joh

Jen
Great! Have you found a way to deal with it for yourself that is uplifting?

Angelina

Jen Still chaste since 2021😁
Yeah I've had thoughts but still going for now

i'm glad to read that. there will always be bad phases, but i think you can overcome them if you think about your general goal. good luck furthermore. 😃

Raquel

glad you are back in the forum i hope you and Ines are well 🙂

Jen

Sin OMG you go girl! Three months is huge.

🤗
Close to 3 months - but time isn't really changing it - doesn't get harder - I think the not excited just annoyed time was my hormones for a bit. But scary to think like what am I actually doing - but that was just as scary in December as now.

Raquel I can not say the same.... It is a bit harder for me.

I've said before - I'm glad I know my body!

Raquel I feel a little identified with you since I think that in those cases a mother who knows what it's like to go through that could help us

Yeah there's stuff we don't really talk about but I know mum knows what's going on with me and it's kind of comforting. But I'm glad to have space and control myself which I don't know if you have.

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