Telling others about your belt

Saintprudence

To address the original topic of this post: I’ve told very few people about my belting. My wife, her parents, my best friend, my wife’s best friend (and backup keyholder), a couple of others we really trust. I hate that I have to keep it secret but the world simply would not understand. It’s one of the reasons I kind of wish voluntary belt-wearing was an accepted thing; in my mind, it’s no different than my friend who vapes a lot. Like me, she is using a tool to prevent her from backsliding into a disgusting habit. But unlike me, her tool is socially acceptable.

it’s why finding forums that talk seriously about belting is so hard. They quickly become cesspools of pervs trying to get their jollies. It’s a big reason I appreciate how hard Laura works to minimize trolls here.

Angelina

Joh

yes and no, i always try to see everything from a parent's point of view in all arguments from such topics. that means if i sound like a typical teenager in this discussion to you, i did everything wrong because i tried to write from a parent's point of view. 😂

Joh

Angelina yes and no, i always try to see everything from a parent's point of view in all arguments from such topics. that means if i sound like a typical teenager in this discussion to you, i did everything wrong because i tried to write from a parent's point of view

🤣 🤣 Well meant is not well done.

Angelina

Joh 🤣 🤣 Well meant is not well done.

it seems so yes 😂

Vanessa Not all the time,I think.

It doesn't need to, as long as it works in general.

Vanessa How he would react?

i don't know, he would probably take the question back. he would never put me in a situation where i didn't know if i was lying to him.

Sara2001 Yes, wearing the tight bands will be the absolut standard. Not wearing them for sport or hiking or things like that will be the absolut exception.

doesn't sound nice to me, but it's your life 😉

Sara2001 I wouldn't say sad. I can't describe it perfectly. Sometimes I feel that I will miss a lot because of wearing it for good, but then I think I will get something more valuable in return. But yes, I sometimes struggle with it.

it's a tough process, you have to weigh what's more important to you and then decide. i'm just afraid that if you wear the chastity equipment for the next 10 years, for example, and then change your mind, daniel won't go along with that decision

Vanessa

Sara2001 He will ask this question on a regular basis with more details. It's very difficult to keep a lie that long and she knows that she has to face severe consequences if she get caught.

I agree,if he asks more details at each time,it would be hard for her to not contradict herself,and be caught.But I guess that,if she can answer well long enough,he trusts her and doesn't ask questions anymore...

Sara2001 He will also talk with her boyfriend from time to time.

So,they should be sure they tell the same things.And I guess he asks her boyfriend less often than her.

Sara2001 Yes, that's impossible.

We agree about it,so!

Sara2001 I don't fear it anymore

But not sad?

Sara2001 I will be able to do some sports again, because he will remove the chain for sport or wandering

Good part!

Sara2001 Definitely, but this is something she has to accept.

Or wait until she can leave,and follow her own rules.

Angelina of course it is not easy, but it is of course possible

Not all the time,I think.

Angelina if my father asked me about it, i wouldn't be able to answer exactly

How he would react?

Sara2001 in our family this counts as lying

In mine too.

Sara2001 For example when we are on a hiking trip, the chain would go back in place when we have a break somewhere, like a restaurant.

Even if for less than 1 hour,for example?

Sara2001

Angelina so at least in most situations only when he is there. And sports are more fun in pairs anyway 🙂

Yes, wearing the tight bands will be the absolut standard. Not wearing them for sport or hiking or things like that will be the absolut exception.

Vanessa But I guess that,if she can answer well long enough,he trusts her and doesn't ask questions anymore...

Yes, but we are all raised in our family, that lying is a major incident. That's one of the most important red lines in our family.

Vanessa So,they should be sure they tell the same things.And I guess he asks her boyfriend less often than her.

I wouldn't risk that. The consequences will most probably very bad. In our family we have the rule that breaking a rule must never bring you any benefit.

I would expect that if they got caught after some time, they will be forbidden to spend private time in bed together or something like that. The longer they hide it, the much longer the punishment will stay in place.

Vanessa But not sad?

I wouldn't say sad. I can't describe it perfectly. Sometimes I feel that I will miss a lot because of wearing it for good, but then I think I will get something more valuable in return. But yes, I sometimes struggle with it.

Vanessa Even if for less than 1 hour,for example?

Yes, he will only take it of for as long as absolutely necessary. He said there will be no exceptions from this rule. I am not sure about sport, but besides this, I will most probably the tightbands 99,9% of the time.

Vanessa

Sara2001 Yes, but we are all raised in our family, that lying is a major incident. That's one of the most important red lines in our family.

Enough to not try,even if it would give her some freedom or advantages?

Sara2001 In our family we have the rule that breaking a rule must never bring you any benefit.

If breaking a rule,it is is mainly to have a benefit,however...Especially if done purposely.

Sara2001 I would expect that if they got caught after some time, they will be forbidden to spend private time in bed together or something like that. The longer they hide it, the much longer the punishment will stay in place.

Hard,but seems logical.

Sara2001 I will get something more valuable in return

Not possible it would be the case if not wearing it?

Good you're not sad about it,anyway;it is normal to struggle about it.

Sara2001 Yes, he will only take it of for as long as absolutely necessary. He said there will be no exceptions from this rule. I am not sure about sport, but besides this, I will most probably the tightbands 99,9% of the time.

I think you would like a lot sports,if it is the main possibility to be free of thigh bands!🙂

Angelina It doesn't need to, as long as it works in general.

I guess so.

Angelina i don't know, he would probably take the question back. he would never put me in a situation where i didn't know if i was lying to him.

Good way to act.Would he ask a similar question,but easier for you to know if you lie,or not?

Sara2001

Could you say him at any time,or only during the planned talks?

Sara2001

Good it is not linked to your marriage in such way.

I agree,if he don't marry you/stay married to you if you're not wearing it,it would not be a good idea to be married.

Sara2001 If non of us knows what's best, he should guide me into carefully testing what is right for us and me

Has it already happened?

Sara2001 Some things I explicitly accept, because I know he likes it and he knows that I do it for this reason, this makes him happy and proud of me and this makes me happy and proud of me, too.

Seems good for both of you,at least!🙂

Joh

Angelina i'm just afraid

Me too.

Sara2001

Angelina it's a tough process, you have to weigh what's more important to you and then decide. i'm just afraid that if you wear the chastity equipment for the next 10 years, for example, and then change your mind, daniel won't go along with that decision

I am sure he will, if I become unhappy in it. It's nothing that I will decide in a classical way. After marriage these decisions will be made by him. He has the final saying in everything, but I know that he deeply, deeply care for me and my happiness. If I become unhappy with my equipment, he will decide what is necessary.

Angelina

Sara2001 If I become unhappy with my equipment, he will decide what is necessary.

That's not my point, the question is whether he is willing to continue the marriage if you decide not to wear the equipment anymore

Joh

Angelina
Interesting question and the answer will be as well.

Sara2001

Angelina That's not my point, the question is whether he is willing to continue the marriage if you decide not to wear the equipment anymore

Of course, otherwise a marriage would be completely out of question. The only reason why I would want out of the equipment is that it makes me unhappy (or for medical reasons including pregnancy). So if I want to get out of the equipment, he will let me out. If not, our relationship would already be severely damaged before. Not letting me out would mean that he doesn't have my happiness in mind as his first priority, but this is mandatory for our relationship as well as my submission to him.

Jen

Sara2001 my happiness in mind as his first priority

If this is his first priority, what should he be deciding for your devices? Should it be like Foxies has?
You seem to be much more restricted than Foxies. Will that really be happiness?
You said you accept he will decide how can it work if you don't know what you want.

Angelina

Sara2001 Of course, otherwise a marriage would be completely out of question

well that's the point i was trying to make, everything else and whether it will ever happen is another matter, but that's what was important for me to read. 😃

Sara2001

Jen If this is his first priority, what should he be deciding for your devices? Should it be like Foxies has?
You seem to be much more restricted than Foxies. Will that really be happiness?
You said you accept he will decide how can it work if you don't know what you want.

Whatever is best for our relationship and me. If non of us knows what's best, he should guide me into carefully testing what is right for us and me. Happiness is much, much more than having unlimited and uncontrolled access to my private parts. I happily give this up for a good life (which doesn't mean that it is always easy and that I am not missing it). Knowing that I can make our lives better makes me happy. Knowing that he thinks about me and is taking very good care of me makes me happy. Knowing that I am the most important aspect in his life makes me happy. It's difficult to explain. You know when it feels right for you. Not any single aspect needs to be perfect, as long as the overall summary is worth it. Some things I explicitly accept, because I know he likes it and he knows that I do it for this reason, this makes him happy and proud of me and this makes me happy and proud of me, too. The whole package must fit.

Joh

Sara2001 The whole package must fit.

Hopefully this will always be in the future.

Sara2001

Vanessa Enough to not try,even if it would give her some freedom or advantages?

Yes, if we are caught lying, my father will make sure that the punishment compensates our advantages a few times. So lying is always a bad idea. The bigger the advantages, the higher the risk.

Vanessa If breaking a rule,it is is mainly to have a benefit,however...Especially if done purposely.

Yes, what I mean the kind of system, let's say you are allowed to eat one ice-cream a day and you eat 2 instead, then the punishment will include that you are not allowed your one ice cream for 2-3 days (stupid example, but it should show the system). At the end you would have less ice cream as if you have been honest.

Vanessa Not possible it would be the case if not wearing it?

I do it for him. So I don't think so.

Vanessa I think you would like a lot sports,if it is the main possibility to be free of thigh bands!

Not a bad thing 🤣

Vanessa Could you say him at any time,or only during the planned talks?

During the planned talks or I can ask him if we can talk about this topic, but it would be a long term thing anyway. We would talk about it, but after the talk there would be a period of thinking. This is no way to get rid of the equipment in a heartbeat. It can be the start of a re-evaluation of a few weeks or months. It would most likely end in some changes instead of a complete removal of the chastity equipment. It's an important part for him.

Vanessa Has it already happened?

All the time, we try a lot of things to see if it is working for us. Many, maybe most of my rules where established like that.

Vanessa Seems good for both of you,at least!

Yes, for me it feels very beneficial.

Angelina

Vanessa Good way to act.Would he ask a similar question,but easier for you to know if you lie,or not?

probably, he would formulate the question in such a way that i could answer it honestly

Sara2001 Yes, what I mean the kind of system, let's say you are allowed to eat one ice-cream a day and you eat 2 instead, then the punishment will include that you are not allowed your one ice cream for 2-3 days (stupid example, but it should show the system). At the end you would have less ice cream as if you have been honest.

now i am hungry for ice cream 😂

Vanessa

Sara2001 The bigger the advantages, the higher the risk.

A way to be sure it would rarely be worth the risks?

Sara2001 At the end you would have less ice cream as if you have been honest.

Except if sure enough to not be caught!😉

Sara2001 Not a bad thing 🤣

Sure!😉

Sara2001 During the planned talks or I can ask him if we can talk about this topic, but it would be a long term thing anyway. We would talk about it, but after the talk there would be a period of thinking. This is no way to get rid of the equipment in a heartbeat. It can be the start of a re-evaluation of a few weeks or months. It would most likely end in some changes instead of a complete removal of the chastity equipment. It's an important part for him.

I'm not surprised,you often mention some weeks or month between asking for the removal of the chastity devices and the time it is removed,to be sure it would not be a temporary change of mind.During this time,would you have other talks about it?

Sara2001 All the time, we try a lot of things to see if it is working for us. Many, maybe most of my rules where established like that.

Good way to try new rules,to know if it works,and how.

Sara2001 Yes, for me it feels very beneficial.

🙂

Angelina now i am hungry for ice cream 😂

🤣

Foxies

It could work!😉

Angelina yes, i agree with you, but a new belt with more space can be ordered quickly 😉

If we can convince them that the old belt is useless and should be discarded,doing a diet to lose weight woudl help!😉

Joh

Sara2001 This is no way to get rid of the equipment in a heartbeat. It can be the start of a re-evaluation of a few weeks or months. It would most likely end in some changes instead of a complete removal of the chastity equipment.

What if he decide to keep you in the belt regardless of your attitude change?

Foxies

Angelina
It just struck me - ice cream could be the very answer for unwilling wearers 🤣

Jen

Foxies
oh if only they knew to offer ice cream everything would be different.
Actually there has not been any dessert since. Is this the punishment

Foxies

Jen

When I said that ice cream could be the very answer for unwilling wearers; I was trying to suggest that uncontrolled weight gain (a common side effect for the medication "ice cream" 🤣 ) might be a way to have the key holder remove the dreaded chastity belt!

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