Talking to girls and young women

Megan

Jen the suggestions that no one should have a belt are insane,,, There is a lot of abuse towards women especially fgm but there are many strong women who prefer chastity

Angelina

a_father We are normal people. Everybody claims to be strong. But I think, this needs more than normal people do. If you have a scale from 0 to 10, where 0 is very weak and 10 is very strong, than I think we are perhaps at 5.

isn't a 5 strong, i think so, i think every human being is strong in their own way 🙂

a_father Concerning your father: I don't believe him

I believe him and also because I have tested it myself.

a_father And to question the criticism of a way of saying something: All women want to be emancipated, but if you say something directly, it means: That's not how you talk to a lady. Where is the mistake?!
I don't harm a fly and I don't put anyone in chastity belts. I don't think I'm the bad guy here.

i don't want to be emancipated but respected, there is a difference. but i don't have a problem with you even if we don't often agree. 😉

Vanessa Not with aggressive people,or people which can't consider they could be wrong,for every word they write.

i don't think he is aggressive and yes he is very stubborn in his opinion but there are things we disagree on but can discuss anyway

Jen

you are a strong person too 🙂

Vanessa

Angelina i don't think he is aggressive and yes he is very stubborn in his opinion but there are things we disagree on but can discuss anyway

But he's not very open to discussing.Only want to impose his opinion.

a_father

Jen I don't compare you with a frog. It's just a comparison of two processes. If you place a frog into cold water and increase the temperature very slowly, the frog can't recognize this. The frog dies without remarking that it becomes worse and worse. With most girls here it's similar. It starts slowly and becomes more and more restrictive. Always in small steps. Nobody would accept all restrictions from the beginning, but in the end it's very bad. The trick is, to increase restrictions step by step and not immediately. To avoid this, you can only stop it in the beginning.

Max9

a_father or just make a concrete defineted "treaty" that can't be changed over time for the worse

Joh

a_father It starts slowly and becomes more and more restrictive. Always in small steps. Nobody would accept all restrictions from the beginning, but in the end it's very bad. The trick is, to increase restrictions step by step and not immediately. To avoid this, you can only stop it in the beginning.

The comparison with the frog is true, but it is a cruel example.
This approach is known as Salami tactics and you find an explanation at Wikipedia.

Resume your situation and think about if it happen to you. I got the impression it have been often.

Angelina

a_father It starts slowly and becomes more and more restrictive.

i agree with you in general, but i also have to say that it doesn't have to be that way. i have already had smaller relaxations as at the beginning and will have more relaxations in july after my birthday, so it works the other way round too 😉

Megan

a_father . If you place a frog into cold water and increase the temperature very slowly, the frog can't recognize this. The frog dies without remarking that it becomes worse and worse. With most girls here it's similar. It starts slowly and becomes more and more restrictive. Always in small steps. Nobody would accept all restrictions from the beginning, but in the end it's very bad. The trick is, to increase restrictions step by step and not immediately. To avoid this, you can only stop it in the beginning.

That experiment was always drugged or lobotomized frogs not healthy frogs. Healthy frogs still get out if they feel warm way before the pot is boiling. I agree with both in a way.
I love my belts even if they are a bit much sometimes and I would want those accessible to me.
However I really don't think there is any reason for the other restraints or the bras or thigh bands. I have never seen those in real life and I think that they are a waste of effort.

@a_father do you know anyways to shut down FGM or places like that? Everyone here could unite against the worst things while they figure their own lives out...

Ines

Vanessa Not with aggressive people,or people which can't consider they could be wrong,for every word they write.

Agree with you. Fully.

a_father

Angelina We'll see in July.

Angelina

a_father

we will, I will prepare for it and as soon as I know more, I will report to you 😉

James

Vanessa But he's not very open to discussing.Only want to impose his opinion.

I did invite him to be a brave man and ask his daughter and wife if they agree. Not even brave enough to reply, he is.

Angelina

Vanessa But he's not very open to discussing.Only want to impose his opinion.

he should become a politician 😂

i know i'm not going to convince him, but i'm interested in why he thinks differently than most people here.

Vanessa

James

Yes,he only ignore it.Probably not able to answer,yes.

Megan my belts

You have several ones?

Angelina that's exactly what my father thinks

And I guess my parents too...

Angelina long talks with my father and even after that i won't be completely free but maybe get some relaxations 🙂

Would be the case in some months,after the next talk about changing the rules,right?

Joh Yes, no thighs band and bra. That would be a great achievement.

It seems it is her objective,or wearing these less often,yes.

a_father

Angelina i know i'm not going to convince him, but i'm interested in why he thinks differently than most people here.

It's vice versa. I think like almost all people think. You are the minority in the 'real world', not I. And you know, that I'm right. Not supporting chastiry belts and still staying here makes me to an unicorn. But just here, everywhere else I'm mainstream.

Laura

Angelina he should become a politician

He wouldn't because "Politics is the art of the possible" and he definitely weak in this art 😂

RafaelGV

a_father I'm sure her father believes keeping his daughter chaste makes her a better person. You and her father have different ideas on whether she should be using the device involuntarily. The age of majority in Germany is eightteen. She's seventeen so a great deal of respect must be given to her fathers wishes. When she reaches the age of eightteen i can say without a doubt that whether or not she continues to wear it, should be none of her father's business.
"You are the minority in the 'real world' " I am inclined to agree but it should be noted that we have no idea how often this happens since it is almost always kept secret.

Angelina

a_father You are the minority in the 'real world', not I.

I know that, I wrote that to you myself once. 😉

a_father And you know, that I'm right.

i disagree

RafaelGV I'm sure her father believes keeping his daughter chaste makes her a better person.

that's exactly what my father thinks

RafaelGV but it should be noted that we have no idea how often this happens since it is almost always kept secret.

But I would also say that we are a minority, not many will be.

Joh I presume he knows that he is breaking the law. @Angelina knows for sure.

we both know, but to be clear, a legal conviction of my father makes my situation worse, not better, otherwise i would have gone to the police immediately.

James

Laura He wouldn't because "Politics is the art of the possible" and he definitely weak in this art

He's so right he's afraid to ask his wife and daughter.

Joh

RafaelGV She's seventeen so a great deal of respect must be given to her fathers wishes

Sorry, I disagree. Because she is under eighteen she is protected by law for this abuse in Germany. §1631 BGB.

If she decide to continue wear it after she reached eighteen than is her decision and this she can do without any problem.

RafaelGV

You are correct. However, she will be better off to make a decision that will give her the best possible future. If her father gets in trouble with the law it's hard to say if that will make her situation better. He most likely will not want to help her financially anymore. I suppose the government would assist her in some ways. I'm just not too familiar with Germany's social safety net.

Joh

RafaelGV If her father gets in trouble with the law it's hard to say if that will make her situation better.

The sword of Damocles has been hanging over his head the whole time. It's almost a miracle that it hasn't happened yet.
And I agree with you. The goal is to get the best for her. For this it is good to assess the situation correctly and the legal side with the consequences is an important part. If you have this in mind you have a good start for negotiations.
His week point could be that he fears if it comes out and his daughter will have problem and a not good future.

RafaelGV

Joh I just became aware that corporal punishment is illegal in Germany. Corporal punishment is legal in some parts of the USA so, I assumed the same of Germany. The fact that it is illegal does give Angelina more leverage. Does her father know he may be breaking the law?

Joh

RafaelGV Does her father know he may be breaking the law?

I presume he knows that he is breaking the law. @Angelina knows for sure.

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