Keyholder welcome thread.

Jenna

Damien also, I in no way wish to diminish the fetish community. Since joining this group I have learned much about chastity and have come to realize that there are many reasons for belt wearing, some of which revolve around various fetishes' . My motivations are different, but that doesn't take make other reasons less valid. To each their own.

Christine

Let me post here too. I'm the keyholder for my single mother. It's rare, but works.

Angelina

Jenna But for me, and I assume most others, including your father, we come from a place of love and caring.

he sometimes has a strange way of showing it, but i really think he does it out of love. but when i see your "career" here in the forum, i wonder if it wouldn't have been better if he had found the forum and not me, then maybe he would have got the same tips as you and some things would at least be a little better

Jenna

Angelina as I have said many times, the forum has been played a huge role in my "development" as a keyholder. I cringe at my early posts and am thankful to so many here who helped me "see the light" so I can have a much more positive relationship with Susan and Kate. Wearing a belt is not easy and being the keyholder (for 2) in not easy either, but the forum is a big help to all of us. The girls and I all agree to that.

Angelina

Jenna

posts like this are exactly what i mean. i think my father might think similar to you today. i might still be in the belt (like your nieces), but the overall conditions might be fairer and the power more equally distributed.

JackF

Suzanne, my wife and keyholder would like to participate in the forum, but she does not receive a confirmation email

Laura

JackF I have activated her account manually. She can login now. However please stay away from outlook e-mail if possible

Suzanne

Laura
Thank you Laura

Suzanne

wife and keyholder of JackF, I will introduce myself in more detail later.

Laura

Also I have activated all accounts that didn't receive a confirmation e-mail recently

Suzanne

Suzanne married to Jack and has been keyholder from the very beginning of our relationship.
As I often read here, chastity is also a family affair with us, with the exception that not the men in the relationships are keyholders, but the women. Something that feels good to me, but I can imagine that many men and women on the forum have a different opinion. So be it. Our family situation my mother is my father's keyholder, my older brother has a girlfriend who is his keyholder. Questions, just ask

Jonas

Suzanne Hello and welcome. I hope you get something valuable from discussions here. From our side, I think its good to have another keyholder speaking on the forum.

I'd like to ask what belts your father, husband and brother wear and whether the restriction on their sexual freedom has, or is intended to have, any overall submissive effect on them?

I've also been looking at what @JackF wrote about the rules agreed from the first date...

1) Chastity isn't a game it's a lifestyle.
2) Don't complain, but bear it.
3) Accept that the chastity belt is inextricably linked in our current and future relationship.
4) Acceptance makes it easier for you.

These seem very strong, and since they're agreed at the outset with consent, I've no problem with them. In fact item 2 is something that I myself need to embrace. Are there any other rules in regard to chastity in your house?

Angelina

Suzanne

interesting to read about a family where the keyholding is the other way round (i.e. the women have the keys). is there a reason for this? in many conservative families the men have the keys because it is also about conservative female values, how is it with you?

Jonas

Suzanne with us, with the exception that not the men in the relationships are keyholders, but the women. Something that feels good to me, but I can imagine that many men and women on the forum have a different opinion. So be it.

Yours is an unusual situation for the forum and clearly not what we're used to discussing, but if you want to speak further, please do so.
I was asking what advice and support your mother gave you; Laura was I think wondering where early belts came from; Angelina was asking about your family's values and Andrew asked what age you and your brother were when you learned about male chastity.

Suzanne

Jonas
All three wear a Carrara belt.
The goal is to prevent uncontrolled masturbation.
Yes it gives a submissive effect, although that is not the intention.
2) Don't complain, but bear it. He accepted it, so the complaining era is over.

Suzanne

Angelina
from what I understand from my mother it started with my grandmother. Grandma was way ahead of her time, you could say. No idea how she did that exactly, then chastity belts / chastity cages for men and women were not common. My mother taught/raised me about male chastity at a young age. It has nothing to do with any kink. But more the prevention of self-gratification. I went through the first phase of wearing a chastity cage with my brother, which helped me a lot with Jack. I knew he wore a chastity cage, but never seen one on him. Later my mother switched from a chastity cage to a chastity belt with my brother, just like with my father. Jack has walked the same path.

Jonas

Suzanne All three wear a Carrara belt.

That's a strong, highly adjustable, belt design so I'd expect the security to be very good. Poor guys! Lol.

The goal is to prevent uncontrolled masturbation.

Suzanne the prevention of self-gratification.

Yes, this is key. Your mother clearly knew what she was talking about.

Yes it gives a submissive effect, although that is not the intention.

Yeah, I guess an imbalance comes along with being the gatekeeper of one of someone else's primary drives/pleasures. Big responsibility though.

2) Don't complain, but bear it. He accepted it, so the complaining era is over.

For me too I think. I'd missed Jack's post first time around. Now I've seen it, I will put a stop to my own complaining. I have an equal relationship with my wife, but that doesn't mean that she doesn't deserve the absolute best out of me.

Jack has walked the same path.

If I may, can I ask how the men in your family have taken to their chastity? Eg: Do they fight their belts? Did they all move from cage to full belt without a fuss? How long did it take them to reach acceptance?

Thanks.

Laura

Suzanne Grandma was way ahead of her time, you could say. No idea how she did that exactly, then chastity belts / chastity cages for men and women were not common.

Female chastity belts have longer history. I'm not sure when male chastity devices were introduced. I guess not earlier than in 80s

Andrew

Suzanne My mother taught/raised me about male chastity at a young age. It has nothing to do with any kink. But more the prevention of self-gratification. I went through the first phase of wearing a chastity cage with my brother,

A fascinating story. I have never encountered a similar case. At what age did your brother start wearing a cage/belt? How old were you when you learned the concept of male chastity?

Joh

Suzanne At wich age did your brother wear a cages and could he refuse?

Suzanne

Jonas
Yes these chastity belts are very secure.
All three have switched from chastity cage to chastity belt, a chastity belt is more secure and more pleasant to wear.
I can only speak for my brother and Jack, it was never a fight.
In the beginning, both had to get used to the idea of chastity and of course they had to get used to wearing a chastity cage. Especially in the beginning, I noticed that Jack really missed self-gratification, a sign to me that the Chastity Cage was not superfluous. The transition from chastity cage to chastity belt took half a year, not that Jack doesn't suffer from ups and downs.
Luckily I had tremendous support from my mother and of course the experiences I gained with my brother.

Jonas

Suzanne Yes these chastity belts are very secure.
All three have switched from chastity cage to chastity belt, a chastity belt is more secure and more pleasant to wear.

Yes and high security encourages acceptance. I'd have thought the transition from cage to belt would have been a bigger deal though. A full belt can be quite intense.

I can only speak for my brother and Jack, it was never a fight.

I understand that chastity is a fundamental part of the relationships, so there can be no fight there. I was thinking more about whether the men have been "caught" fighting the belts? Far from being superfluous, I'd imagine the belts are preventing self-gratification 24/7.

Luckily I had tremendous support from my mother and of course the experiences I gained with my brother.

When you have another moment, can I ask what advice and support your mother gave?

Philip

Laura tollyboy have been making belts from the mid 50's

Laura

Philip Yes, but female belts only

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