Keyholder welcome thread.

Angelina

youdontknowme I mean, he does have a point that the number of people who proclaim to be in less-than-consensual keyholding relationships is hard to believe and even harder to accept, so some hope in the notion that not every story is completely accurate seems justified in my eyes.

i wouldn't believe it either if i hadn't experienced it myself and until i read this forum (and the thread on misterpoll) i didn't believe it was happening to others either

KHDream But on the other hand I just find the issue of parents belting their kids so extremely uncomfortable that I had very serious doubt whether this is a place where you would want to join at all.

how do you feel about this if it is not involuntary, or even at the request of the teenage children or young adult children?

Joh

KHDream I would like to keep my partner locked up. (And as a matter of fact, she is actually wearing one as I'm writing this. But there's still a very long way left to go.)

Which is your reason to have your partner in a CB?
Is it a brand or a no-name CB?
What will be the regime when she is 24/7?

tonif

Sabina

tonif An almost philosophical question. 😉 In my opinion, the keyholder is the person who holds the keys to another person's belt, not his own.

Joh

tonif
The task of a Key holder is not only to decide when and for what the belt should be unlocked, but also to make sure that the wearer is well. Whether e.g. skin irritations or inflammations occur can be done by everyone with a little care. With psychological problems this is no longer possible. And these are the most difficult and challenging tasks. It is precisely the mental support in phases of doubt that one needs support from someone else and that is what the KH has to provide.
From my View Point it is not a key holder

Angelina

tonif

The question is more likely whether it works and then it depends on the goal.

If you're using the belt to avoid making stupid decisions at a drunken party or to protect yourself from sexual assault, then you can keep the keys and be your own keyholder.
If you want to live chastely 24/7 without orgasm for years, then most people are probably too weak and need another person

Jenna

Joh I 100% agree with you. The wearer can not be the Keyholder under any circumstances, it would defeat the whole purpose of wearing a belt in the first place. I wish there were more keyholders here. I do this for two girls, and I do it because I love and care for them. There is no doubt it can be difficult a times, we have lots of creams and balms when the pinch, and I have the luxury of being able to switch them into different belts if on becomes uncomfortable.

Joh And these are the most difficult and challenging tasks. It is precisely the mental support in phases of doubt that one needs support from someone else and that is what the KH has to provide.

Absolutely Joh, this is the hardest part of being a KH. Supporting them when they come home late at night when hormones are raging, erasing any doubts about the value of the belts, comforting them until emotions are in check. The wearer always has to know that they are doing the right thing and the KH is there to support them no matter what.

tonif

Joh

tonif
I think you can manage your key in the right mind but it doesn't make you a key holder in my View. Otherwise s save with timelock would one as well 😉

Ines

@tonif ,

my contribution:

1- I think that keeping your own keys does not become you on a key holder.

2- If it serves well to you, go ahead. Here we have some wearers without key holder, ( @Jen or @Avery ) and they are highly respected members of this community.

youdontknowme

Someone holding their own keys is as much a keyholder as someone fixing their own car is a mechanic, someone preparing their own food is a chef or someone cutting their own hair is a barber.

Joh

youdontknowme someone cutting their own hair is a barber.

Just because you can cut hair does not make you a hairdresser. This can be seen in the result, especially when you go through all the different tasks of a hairdresser.
The Same apply to the other erxamples too.

tonif

youdontknowme

Joh exactly my point

tonif

Avery

Naw.

tonif

Milord

I came here as aspiring KH for my wife and for a sissy slave
I thought that having a belted wife slave could be a great idea to enhance her submission
[We live a total power exchange relationship, a very committed Dominant / submissive type of relationship
The amount of moral violence I've seen there makes me pass on this idea. I deeply care for her and I don't want to abuse, so I pass on it.
Eventually by knowing you more and learning the positive sides (there should be positive sides, right?) I will think again, for now it's a big red flag

MissBlossom

Milord
Have you discussed it with her? How does she feel?

The fact that you care so much for her safety and well-being, and that she already trusts you with so much power over her, means that it might work out very well for you two. Why go without something you may enjoy just because some other people do it irresponsibly?

Sin

Milord I thought that having a belted wife slave could be a great idea to enhance her submission
The amount of moral violence I've seen there makes me pass on this idea. I deeply care for her and I don't want to abuse, so I pass on it.

I think you should do it. Please be aware that for many of us who live in a chastity / kink lifestyle, much of what you read here is not reality.

It took me years to get to a point where wearing a belt was possible. The reality is there's nothing wrong with taking a break, putting it in a cupboard for a few weeks, or only wearing it on date nights.

If your wife is submissive I think it would make a great present, and it has the potential to become a deep emotional journey for you both to indulge in. The abuse that you read about on here is certainly not what the wider chastity community is about, and it shouldn't be viewed as an instruction manual for your own relationship. But I think you already knew that. ;-)

Joh

Milord
You have already heard from the other members about responsible behaviour and reactions when we see that stories are most likely fantasy or against our rules. So I just want to add the following. We have members from all over the world and so there are different laws and morals that apply. It is very difficult to find out clearly whether a story is fictitious or reality. So when someone comes here we want to help as much as we can. So there can still be stories here that are possibly fictional. So I think it is better to leave them than to drive away a person who is looking for help.

I assume that your relationship is based on trust and that you have regular conversations. I also assume that everything that happens between you has been discussed beforehand and has been voluntarily agreed to by both parties. In that case I see a chastity belt only as a tool and it is up to you what to do with it. Comparable to a hammer that can be used to drive a nail into the wall or to smash someone's hand. The hammer has no influence on it. It only depends on the user.
First you need to think about what you want to archive and when you have a clear view talk with you wife.
If you continue with a CB for your wife I recommend she will join our forum as well to get advise and can talk with other wearers about her situation. It will help her to get through the start and later on.

By the way. What's your wife's name? I would prefer to call her by her name and not have to dub her a slave here.

Milord

MissBlossom do you know from great power came great responsability? That's how I feel.
I've been blessed with a wonderful slave wife that brighten my life. The amount of power I have over her is impressive.
And this makes me very attentive. I've been deeply troubled by what I read here, and up to know, fear of making her suffers is higher than the pleasure we can get. I never do anything that makes me uncomfortable, because it will end badly. But thanks a lot for advising me. I hope that the sense of abuse I'm feeling will eventually pass.

tonif

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