My daughters potential chastity

PigtailSam

Milord She can’t control her own life”. You, as parent, should teach her to get in control of her life. This is your duty as parent. Not taking control of her life, this is where abuse lies

This is the underlying problem you arn’t understanding. I cant teach her to make healthy choices to control her own life. I’ve tried since she was little. Theropist have tried . Doctors have tried. The part of her brain that controls impulse control doesn’t work. She can understand consequences but just doesn’t care about them. If there was a better option than a belt I’m open to it. But letting her fail on her own is not an option. Without my guidance she will end up pregnant, on drugs, with an std. Her relationship with me and her father is the only thing that keeps her from doing the real dumb stuff. She respects us and wants to remain close to us. That is the only consequence she does care about to some extent. I have never abused my daughter. She has abused me. She has said hurtful things she didn’t mean because she was pissed. But she wouldn’t cry to the cops about a belt. Although she doesn’t generally care about consequences she does care about me and would not try and hurt me like that.

Milord

PigtailSam you are walking a very dangerous path. You are risking destroying the only thing that keeps her from failing, by resorting to a solution worse than the problem. Feelings are not set in stone. If the situation is the one you describe (and only you know it) you should consider removing her from college and demand she finds work. Then you want to put a CB on someone who doesn't care for consequences? are you serious?
What if she tells her friends?
what if she tells to her teachers?
what if your relatives discover her?
what if she goes to a DIY center and buy a hacksaw?
What if she hurts herself trying to remove?
what if she decides to do some foolish things to get back her freedom?
What if she cries for help?
What if she decides to move in with his boyfriend?
Just the first things...

James

PigtailSam

I understand quite well the dynamics at play here. I expect she's quite academically gifted in select areas despite the social issues?

Kaja

PigtailSam This post say one thing for us. The problem is in you. You want to be her messiah, new Jesus. It is not what she needs. She needs love ans profesional help and not medieval torture from medieval mind.

Angelina

PigtailSam But it does seem worse to me forcing her to take birth control.

Compared to the belt, it seems to me to be the milder measure

PigtailSam This is the underlying problem you arn’t understanding. I cant teach her to make healthy choices to control her own life. I’ve tried since she was little. Theropist have tried . Doctors have tried. The part of her brain that controls impulse control doesn’t work. She can understand consequences but just doesn’t care about them. If there was a better option than a belt I’m open to it.

I have an idea, but I would need a medical report and I would need to know what the laws are where you live. I don't think this idea will go down well in the forum, but if what you say is true and it is medically proven, have you ever thought about putting your daughter under legal guardianship? It seems she is not capable of making healthy decisions and if I look at your main problem (preventing pregnancy), it might even be possible to force her to use contraception through legal guardianship, i.e. by wearing an IUD.
And to all those who are outraged by my idea: Do you really think a chastity belt would be a better alternative? I don't think so

Kaja

Milord Thats true I (and me bf have the same experience) usually dont think about sex (I mean when Im at school, public transport etc). But with longer time without reliefe I think more and more about sex. About week without orgasm I think about sex 24/7 and I cant have anything other in my mind. My brain moves to my pussy 😀

toad

I appreciate your concern for your daughter. Poor impulse control and not caring about consequences spells addict to me. I've had my bout with alcohol and drugs, i used to feel the same way. New love and sex are pretty powerful things and very hard to overcome rationally. Seems to me there is a big difference between a young belted virgin, and a young woman in love who enjoys sex. At her age she will most likely follow her boyfriend rather than you. Perhaps talk with him and explain your views for her future. He should be concerned about her overall welfare and perhaps can help her do better in school. There are millions of sexual active young women who finish college. So i don't see sex as the problem. Implants for pregancy work well with no care. Belt or not, i doubt she'll give up her boyfriend and bad habits Love and pleasure are powerful forces. However after all of that; as an old man locked in chastity, i can truthfully say i wish i had be locked in my teens with the key given to longterm girlfriend or wife. It would have been a positive motivational force in many worthwhile areas. Sex is fun, but it creates many problems for both men and women. Try to remember the love you have for her just as the love you have for your husband will enable you to transend all problems. She will grow up whether she wants to or not.....life is like that.

Kaja

PigtailSam There is one solition. The word is contraception. We are saying it all the time but your ears are stuffy and your mind is clouded.

James

Kaja

I really don't understand why you insist on name calling as if you are in elementary school.

Kaja

I am going to assume you know this isn't a casual subject at the best of times.

PigtailSam

Kaja that doesn’t prevent stds. A doctor won’t force it on her if she I unwilling. No need to be rude . I heard the suggestion.

Kaja

PigtailSam Abortion.

PigtailSam

Kaja that isn’t birth control and would be a last resort. I’m not religious, but I’d much rather a chastity belt be used then abort a baby.

PigtailSam

James I understand quite well the dynamics at play here. I expect she's quite academically gifted in select areas despite the social issues?

Not gifted academically because she doesn’t try. But she is smart. She is fine socially. Just doesn’t care much about anything but her boyfriend and me.

James

PigtailSam

As someone who has a dead cousin whose baby had to be raised by her brother and mother....I do get it.

James

PigtailSam

I see. What involvement does Dad have here?

MissBlossom

PigtailSam Not gifted academically because she doesn’t try. But she is smart. She is fine socially. Just doesn’t care much about anything but her boyfriend and me.

Is it possible that college just isn't for her? Is her boyfriend willing to marry her and support her as a stay at home mom?

PigtailSam

James I see. What involvement does Dad have here?

Very involved, but since we’re trying to talk her into it, and she is closer with me I am the one mainly talking to her about it. He more just wants to lock a belt on her and be done with it.

MissBlossom

PigtailSam Typo, wire up but crack, Not “bird”

From what I read, that's the option that allows for the most activity while wearing the belt, but also the one that's the messiest to clean up after going number 2.

Also very important to clean fully every time to avoid a rash.

This seems like the option with the heaviest burden, and thus with this option all of my comments about bearing the burden with her go double.

PigtailSam

MissBlossom Is it possible that college just isn't for her? Is her boyfriend willing to marry her and support her as a stay at home mom?

Her boy friend is a drug user who is at risk of failing out as well. College isn’t the only path, but it would be a shame to waste her intelligence.

James

PigtailSam

That does sound like a man. sighs gently

James

PigtailSam

There is a lot here, and I suspect the diagnoses you haven't mentioned speak a bunch to it?

Laura

PigtailSam Her boy friend is a drug user who is at risk of failing out as well.

Then why doesn't she just break up? He is definitely not a right man

PigtailSam

James yes

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