Jenna 2.0
Thank you for sharing your real history; it puts a lot of what you have said in the past into perspective, and I feel like I have a much better grasp of where you are coming from than I did before.
While there are still many things I would like to ask you, I think the most important is this: Why the deception? I can understand not wanting to be open about parts of it, but why did you feel the need to post an invented story about your fictional nices instead of the actual situation with Lilly, which would have fit right in hear?
Renita any markings on the belt were filed off before I wore it. I think that was to prevent me, and any of the other girls that wore them, from trying to contact the manufacturer for a key. It was silly really, we were not allowed any outside contact that was not monitored and this predated cell phones and the internet. If I had to guess though, in looking at images on the internet long after I ran away, it may have been from a company called Tollyboy.
pestulens Why the deception? I can understand not wanting to be open about parts of it, but why did you feel the need to post an invented story about your fictional nices instead of the actual situation with Lilly, which would have fit right in hear?
That is a good question, and I maybe the best way to answer it is this way. I still harbored major anger at my step sisters and there was no way to incorporate both of them into a real story involving just Lilly. Also when I first reached out to the forum I wanted to ensure that there was not a sexual/fetish angle to the advice I was soliciting. I didn't want people to get the wrong idea and I thought it better ask for help for a parent/relative angle rather than from a bar owner looking to put a belt on one of her employees.
I took a lot of harsh criticism in the beginning, and 100% of it was totally deserved. But as I said before and I will say again, there are some really good, knowledgeable people who's hearts are in the right place in this forum. And yes I am talking to you @Angelina first a foremost. But there are others too, some who sadly I don't think are here anymore, but we very gracious towards me
The process that I described with "Susan" roughly mirrored what I went through with Lilly. Obviously i made up things like the senior prom and other details, but the crux of the situation with Lilly took kind of the same path. I will go through it again and answer questions, I owe it to the people I misled to tell the truth now.
Jenna I think I have a decent understanding now of how things went so at least as far as I’m concerned there’s not much else to explain really. I mean that story was so long it would probably takes years to tease out what was true, half true and fiction.
Curious though, does Lilly read here? Her past sounds similar in some ways to my own
Jenna belt did prevent unwanted sexual aggression by the creepy older men that I was regularly exposed to. It took me a long time to realize that maybe my mother did that to protect me
Maybe you want to start with your own story. It sounds euphemistic to speak of protection when your mother locked you in a belt before exposing you to creepy old men?
Im sorry but I can not trust you. Both your stories - first story about you and your cb and the second one with your fosterdaughter - look to me as a foiled porn.
There is a long way to trust you again.
I really can not say that you wrote porn like therapy. Sorry. I really can not trust that you are female. Might be your age can be real.
First of all, welcome back, Jenna. I am happy that you were able to come clean and join this community again with a greater commitment to honesty.
That said, I also feel like I need to agree with Kaja. While I do not think the experiences you are currently talking about sound like a pornographic story, I do think that this is still quite the extraordinary experience, and I hope you understand that after your last story turned out to be largely fabricated, I am reluctant to extend as much of a benefit of doubt to you as I usually do with other members. I also agree with people like Renita, Damien or Laura that your own history might be very interesting to hear. Like, this is a life you ran away from, yet you apparently found enough positives in the experience that you are willing to encourage another person to try it. Your thought processes on that would be highly appreciated.
Jenna
Did you ever consider getting professional help? You definitely would benefit from a good psychologist, maybe even psychiatrist.
What you did with your story is called projection and clear indication of your own serious mental problems which you quite obviously have not managed to get over yet.
Let me give a collective response here to @Damien @Kaja @Laura and @youdontknowme I totally get what you are saying and credibility takes time to rebuild, especially in my case. I am happy to discuss my time in the belt when I was younger, but that was over 20+ years ago. I am in my late 40's, older than what I said earlier. Like all women, and most men too, who doesn't want to be younger?
In any event I freely admit that being locked in a belt at a young age was not ideal by any measure. I never liked it but did eventually get used to it. Much later on I came to appreciate the fact that it very likely kept me safe from unwanted sexual encounters that I would have been powerless to stop. If the group here feels that part of my history is relevant than I am happy to expand.
In the case of Lilly, her own worst enemy is herself and she freely admits that belt has helped with preventing poor decision making. Getting to that step however was not easy. Wearing a chastity belt is not easy, having done so for like 4 years makes makes me qualified to discuss it and realize that it is an extreme measure, but in certain cases it may be the only thing that works. I focus on this because that is where I am at today.
curious I have considered it but have not done it yet. I do agree it may help and I should take seriously going into see a professional. My childhood growing into young adulthood was absolutely fucked up and for a whole lot more reasons than I care to get into here. These kinds of whacko quasi religious groups are still out there and if any girl is in one and can read this, run and never look back.
Welcome back. I appreciate your willingness to engage with everyone here again, in what feels like a more candid way. I am not entirely sure I buy the idea of a bar owner, putting a belt on their employee, who also lives with them, but there is "not sexual/fetish angle", despite being of mutually attracted genders, rings entirely true to me but will reserve judgement. I am curious to learn more about your experiences growing up and the situation with your current employee/friend (ward?)
Jenna If the group here feels that part of my history is relevant than I am happy to expand.
Were you raised FLDS? While not the only group with old men preying one young girls/women they are certainly one of the more prominent ones out west.