Home and family rules

Sara2001

Angelina it seems to me a little like your father doesn't care about your opinion and daniel now has to be the "mouthpiece" for both of you 🙁

Of course that's not the case, communication structure is just very different. I think it is good that I am allowed to clarify anything with Daniel so that I don't have to deal with my father and Daniels opinion. It doesn't mean that my father doesn't care for me but that he trusts Daniel well enough to give him this responsibility. For me this is very good, because I know earlier how it will be later.

Vanessa Yes,if he'll react this way,it would be more easy to do it like it is planned.Will your opinion and feelings be taken into account,when you'll talk about your decision,even if it is after?

Normally I have to say my options and feelings before Daniel and my father talk. But if they have overseen something important they will of course talk again.

Vanessa Only about the chastity bra,or more generally?

In general. The chastity bra is only the beginning.

Vanessa It seems her father want to give more "power" to him about @Sara2001's lifestyle,maybe to prepare him well to lead the couple,as the relationship seems to be very serious,and can easily lead to marriage.

I think the same, this is how he supports our relationship and give us more freedom of choice. In our lifestyle this means the power goes to Daniel.

Angelina

Sara2001 Of course that's not the case, communication structure is just very different. I think it is good that I am allowed to clarify anything with Daniel so that I don't have to deal with my father and Daniels opinion. It doesn't mean that my father doesn't care for me but that he trusts Daniel well enough to give him this responsibility. For me this is very good, because I know earlier how it will be later.

ok, i try to understand your lifestyle even if it is hard for me because it is completely different with us

my father would never discuss about me with camryn. even if i wanted to, my father would not accept it. an example: if camryn would discuss a rule of mine with my father, he would say that he does not discuss it with her and that it is a matter between me and angelina

Vanessa

Sara2001 For me this is very good, because I know earlier how it will be later.

Pretty right,yes;you can get used to it.

Sara2001 But if they have overseen something important they will of course talk again.

Good you can tell them if there is something they should talk about,even after the initial talk.Are you never frustrated to not be able to intervene more directly?

Sara2001 In general. The chastity bra is only the beginning.

So you'll know better how it is done,and if you're ok with it.

Sara2001 I think the same, this is how he supports our relationship and give us more freedom of choice. In our lifestyle this means the power goes to Daniel.

Not a bad idea,in your lifestyle,to do it this way,step by step.

Angelina my father would never discuss about me with camryn. even if i wanted to, my father would not accept it. an example: if camryn would discuss a rule of mine with my father, he would say that he does not discuss it with her and that it is a matter between me and angelina

A bit similar.At least,they would call me to be present(and I would participate to the talk,of course).

Sara2001

Angelina Yes, that is a big difference.

Sara2001

Vanessa Are you never frustrated to not be able to intervene more directly?

I am used to it. Sometimes I wish to be able to say no to something but this never was the case. I have to obey or I get punished.

Vanessa Not a bad idea,in your lifestyle,to do it this way,step by step.

For me it feels right.

Angelina

Vanessa A bit similar.At least,they would call me to be present(and I would participate to the talk,of course).

I think I need to express myself more clearly 😉

with me, as with Sara, it's just the other way around. when it comes to rules that only concern me, camryn must not be in the room, so that she can't support me and thus create a majority 🙁

Sara2001 I have to obey or I get punished.

how your father wants you to become a good grown woman with this attitude is a mystery to me

Vanessa

Sara2001 I am used to it. Sometimes I wish to be able to say no to something but this never was the case. I have to obey or I get punished.

I guess if it was always the case for you,it was esaier to accept...

Sara2001 For me it feels right.

I think you're right,too.

Angelina I think I need to express myself more clearly 😉

with me, as with Sara, it's just the other way around. when it comes to rules that only concern me, camryn must not be in the room, so that she can't support me and thus create a majority 🙁

Understandable;not a problem for me,as,even if we are in majority,it would not impact my parents' decision.Otherwise,it would be complex,as my twin and me would side for changing a rule we have in common,and would ask when only one of our parents is available.

Angelina What about responsibility?
that's an interface in both areas, what's his opinion?

I tend to agree with you.WIthout enough freedom,there can't be true responsibility.

Angelina in my opinion (and that of my father) responsibility is not possible without a certain independence 😉

I agree too.

Sara2001 I think this counts as a bit of independence 🙂

So it could be only a bit of responsibility!😉

Angelina it is the same with me 😉

Similar for my twin and me.But we often have to do some before spending too much time with our boyfriend/girlfriend,or our friends.And it was even more strict about homework.

Sara2001

Angelina how your father wants you to become a good grown woman with this attitude is a mystery to me

Grown and independent are two different things for my father. You can be "grown" and responsibilitie for your tasks and taking care of your rules without the need to be independent. Independency is no goal for my father.

Angelina

Sara2001

hmm ok, that seems to be the case in your family and I don't want to talk you into it, especially because I can't write your father directly 😉

What about responsibility?
that's an interface in both areas, what's his opinion?

Sara2001

Angelina What about responsibility?
that's an interface in both areas, what's his opinion?

I am not sure what you mean, but responsibility is very important for my father. He is very strict when it comes to our tasks and their results as well as our rules. We are responsible for these things.

Angelina

Sara2001 I am not sure what you mean

even though I know you think otherwise 😉

in my opinion (and that of my father) responsibility is not possible without a certain independence 😉

Sara2001

Angelina responsibility is not possible without a certain independence 😉

I can decide when I do my tasks and when I do whatever I want, but it the tasks are not done in time, I am in trouble. I think this counts as a bit of independence 🙂

Angelina

Sara2001

I agree with you and can add that it is the same with me 😉

Sara2001

Vanessa So it could be only a bit of responsibility!😉

Yes, as a woman I should only be responsible for the things under my control. My tasks, my rules and my general behaviour.

Angelina

Vanessa if we are in majority,it would not impact my parents' decision

in my home, the one who has the best arguments wins the discussion, so he doesn't want me to get support from camryn so he can avoid additional arguments 🙁

Vanessa Similar for my twin and me.But we often have to do some before spending too much time with our boyfriend/girlfriend,or our friends.And it was even more strict about homework.

own time management is part of the sense of responsibility

Vanessa

Sara2001

Wouldn't you like to be more responsible about other things,like how to manage wisely your money and such?

Angelina in my home, the one who has the best arguments wins the discussion, so he doesn't want me to get support from camryn so he can avoid additional arguments 🙁

Good way to act.My parents tend to listen to my arguments,but they generally think much about a rule,and know how to counter a good argument.

Angelina own time management is part of the sense of responsibility

Yes,and I'm sure I could manage it well,even if not doing it like I must,but my parents think it is important to learn that work should come before fun...

Sara2001

Vanessa Wouldn't you like to be more responsible about other things,like how to manage wisely your money and such?

I don't know. If I am not in charge, it can't be my fault :🙂 . It is also a good feeling that someone else is taking care of you.

Angelina

Vanessa ,but my parents think it is important to learn that work should come before fun...

my father only thinks that the work has to be finished, he doesn't care when and where but the work has to be finished in time

you can see by this that he works self-employed 😉

Sara2001 I don't know. If I am not in charge, it can't be my fault :🙂

hahaha this is also an interesting way of thinking 😂

Vanessa

Sara2001

Right,a good part about it!😉

Angelina my father only thinks that the work has to be finished, he doesn't care when and where but the work has to be finished in time

you can see by this that he works self-employed 😉

Yes,I guess it can impact a bit how he thinks about it.I would like my parents think that way,too...

Angelina

Vanessa

he says that time management is an important step to becoming a responsible woman 😉

Vanessa

Angelina

Even if my parents doesn't think the same(they agree that learning about time management is important,but it is a less important part than "work/study come first",in their opinion),I think it is a good opinion.