Vanessa Are you never frustrated to not be able to intervene more directly?

I am used to it. Sometimes I wish to be able to say no to something but this never was the case. I have to obey or I get punished.

Vanessa Not a bad idea,in your lifestyle,to do it this way,step by step.

For me it feels right.

    Vanessa A bit similar.At least,they would call me to be present(and I would participate to the talk,of course).

    I think I need to express myself more clearly 😉

    with me, as with Sara, it's just the other way around. when it comes to rules that only concern me, camryn must not be in the room, so that she can't support me and thus create a majority 🙁

    Sara2001 I have to obey or I get punished.

    how your father wants you to become a good grown woman with this attitude is a mystery to me

      Angelina how your father wants you to become a good grown woman with this attitude is a mystery to me

      Grown and independent are two different things for my father. You can be "grown" and responsibilitie for your tasks and taking care of your rules without the need to be independent. Independency is no goal for my father.

        Sara2001

        hmm ok, that seems to be the case in your family and I don't want to talk you into it, especially because I can't write your father directly 😉

        What about responsibility?
        that's an interface in both areas, what's his opinion?

          Angelina What about responsibility?
          that's an interface in both areas, what's his opinion?

          I am not sure what you mean, but responsibility is very important for my father. He is very strict when it comes to our tasks and their results as well as our rules. We are responsible for these things.

            Sara2001 I am not sure what you mean

            even though I know you think otherwise 😉

            in my opinion (and that of my father) responsibility is not possible without a certain independence 😉

              Angelina responsibility is not possible without a certain independence 😉

              I can decide when I do my tasks and when I do whatever I want, but it the tasks are not done in time, I am in trouble. I think this counts as a bit of independence 🙂

                Sara2001 I am used to it. Sometimes I wish to be able to say no to something but this never was the case. I have to obey or I get punished.

                I guess if it was always the case for you,it was esaier to accept...

                Sara2001 For me it feels right.

                I think you're right,too.

                Angelina I think I need to express myself more clearly 😉

                with me, as with Sara, it's just the other way around. when it comes to rules that only concern me, camryn must not be in the room, so that she can't support me and thus create a majority 🙁

                Understandable;not a problem for me,as,even if we are in majority,it would not impact my parents' decision.Otherwise,it would be complex,as my twin and me would side for changing a rule we have in common,and would ask when only one of our parents is available.

                Angelina What about responsibility?
                that's an interface in both areas, what's his opinion?

                I tend to agree with you.WIthout enough freedom,there can't be true responsibility.

                Angelina in my opinion (and that of my father) responsibility is not possible without a certain independence 😉

                I agree too.

                Sara2001 I think this counts as a bit of independence 🙂

                So it could be only a bit of responsibility!😉

                Angelina it is the same with me 😉

                Similar for my twin and me.But we often have to do some before spending too much time with our boyfriend/girlfriend,or our friends.And it was even more strict about homework.

                  Vanessa So it could be only a bit of responsibility!😉

                  Yes, as a woman I should only be responsible for the things under my control. My tasks, my rules and my general behaviour.

                    Vanessa if we are in majority,it would not impact my parents' decision

                    in my home, the one who has the best arguments wins the discussion, so he doesn't want me to get support from camryn so he can avoid additional arguments 🙁

                    Vanessa Similar for my twin and me.But we often have to do some before spending too much time with our boyfriend/girlfriend,or our friends.And it was even more strict about homework.

                    own time management is part of the sense of responsibility

                      Sara2001

                      Wouldn't you like to be more responsible about other things,like how to manage wisely your money and such?

                      Angelina in my home, the one who has the best arguments wins the discussion, so he doesn't want me to get support from camryn so he can avoid additional arguments 🙁

                      Good way to act.My parents tend to listen to my arguments,but they generally think much about a rule,and know how to counter a good argument.

                      Angelina own time management is part of the sense of responsibility

                      Yes,and I'm sure I could manage it well,even if not doing it like I must,but my parents think it is important to learn that work should come before fun...

                        Vanessa Wouldn't you like to be more responsible about other things,like how to manage wisely your money and such?

                        I don't know. If I am not in charge, it can't be my fault :🙂 . It is also a good feeling that someone else is taking care of you.

                          Vanessa ,but my parents think it is important to learn that work should come before fun...

                          my father only thinks that the work has to be finished, he doesn't care when and where but the work has to be finished in time

                          you can see by this that he works self-employed 😉

                          Sara2001 I don't know. If I am not in charge, it can't be my fault :🙂

                          hahaha this is also an interesting way of thinking 😂

                            Sara2001

                            Right,a good part about it!😉

                            Angelina my father only thinks that the work has to be finished, he doesn't care when and where but the work has to be finished in time

                            you can see by this that he works self-employed 😉

                            Yes,I guess it can impact a bit how he thinks about it.I would like my parents think that way,too...

                              Vanessa

                              he says that time management is an important step to becoming a responsible woman 😉

                                Angelina

                                Even if my parents doesn't think the same(they agree that learning about time management is important,but it is a less important part than "work/study come first",in their opinion),I think it is a good opinion.

                                  Vanessa

                                  it's just the rules of your parents, so it's hard to change anything, but maybe you can change something else because at 24 you should be able to organize your own time management

                                    Angelina

                                    Maybe I would try to argue about it after I get some more jobs,to show them my employers trust me and they should do so,too...

                                      Vanessa

                                      it would be bad if your employers trust you more than your parents, after all your parents have known you all your life