It arrived today and was brought out in the evening once Dad was home. Seeing it made things easier - I was more convinced they really couldn't make me wear that.

I ran through my practiced speech; I'm not going to wear it not even try it. Doesn't matter what was agreed it is ridiculous. You can't ground me for not trying it isn't fair what would your friends say if you told them why I was grounded.
Mum was getting really upset but it's Dad's words I remember. He says it isn't a punishment it is to provide me a strength I don't have myself and he says Mum was a proper virgin when they married and that was really special. I was trying to say no-one cares about that any more but he goes on. He said Mum showed him the toy I had and what I said about it and then he said I have unrealistic expectations of guys. I felt.. I don't know it was like the part of myself which is how I think they see me just crashed. I ran to my room and have been here since. Eventually dad brought me my phone, I don't know what that means or what will happen tomorrow.

    Jen ...Hello Jen. I'm very sorry you had such a rough evening. What did he mean by "I have unrealistic expectations of guys".

        Jen

        hello, i'm sorry that the conversation didn't go so well, but i always wonder why it wasn't talked about calmly beforehand. now the belt is here and so is the drama. i hope that you won't be punished too harshly for refusing the belt, because it could change your decision if the punishment is too high.

        • Jen replied to this.

            Jen As expected. If you now try wearing it, you loose your freedom. The next days will be hard, but I hope they accept your decission. You should make clear, you need no protection, especially no chastity belt. You can tell them, you make it public if they force you (if there is no other way to stop them). Believe me, they want such things to stay secret. Now your father will try to talk to you and perhapse make promises. But your freedom is your freedom. If you give in, you've lost. Compromises are not a solution either. A chastity belt is just not negotiable. I hope they understand. Otherwise you will need outside help. Things will become better with time. Tell them how you feel and that you see a chastity belt as sexual abuse. Ask them, who else in the family, neighbourhood, friends have to wear such a thing and why they think, this can solve problems you don't have.

                Jen He said Mum showed him the toy I had and what I said about it and then he said I have unrealistic expectations of guys

                There is not only one type of man there are many different. That is why it is so difficult to find the right one. Applies to both sides.
                My first time was with a woman who had experience. It was a great experience and not a disaster, which can easily come out if you do not know how to deal with each other.

                Do not agree to try it.

                You will find the right one because you are the way you are. 👍️ 👏

                  Renita Ask them for the key from the belt before any further negotiations.

                  Any kind of negotiation I worry I will lose. I get very emotional too. asking for the key means I'm considering putting it on which means what I don't know. I'm calmer thinking I've refused and will not talk about it again.

                      Jen

                      Not an easy situation.

                      It seems the part about your sex-toy,and what they thought about it,have been harder emotionally than the belt;I guess because you haven't expected it.

                      I doubt your parents change their mind,even if your father gave back your phone,but they may understand it is hard for you and are willing to take enough time to try to convince you,without using too strict restrictions.

                      Why have you changed your mind,to not give it a try?Even if already knowing you would not accept(what they should not know,if you tell them you agree to try it),you may try it,it would give your parents the feelings you try to do a step too.It would not solve the problem,but make the situation less tense and prove them you have tried,instead or rejecting it immediately.It can help a bit for other talks.

                      James

                      I guess he talked about the size of her sex-toy...

                      Renita

                      Good idea.Even if I doubt they would not give her her key if she tell them she would stop wearing it(and,anyway,firefighters,locksmith,etc...can destroy/open it).

                      Jen will not talk about it again.

                      I strongly doubt they say it's ok and put it in the bin without any talks...

                                Jen I'm calmer thinking I've refused and will not talk about it again.

                                Good decision. 👍️

                                  Vanessa Why have you changed your mind,to not give it a try?Even if already knowing you would not accept(what they should not know,if you tell them you agree to try it),you may try it,it would give your parents the feelings you try to do a step too.It would not solve the problem,but make the situation less tense and prove them you have tried,instead or rejecting it immediately.It can help a bit for other talks.

                                  Read about Salami tactics
                                  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salami_tactics
                                  If @Jen try it I fear it will be the first step to losing.

                                      Joh it's like salami tactics but perhaps less nefarious. This is rather petty instead.

                                        a_father They will punish her out of spite, which is unfortunate because parents shouldn't be spiteful. They are older, more mature and therefore should be the "bigger person".

                                          I've had a chance to look at it some more this morning. It's so small I guess it's a hip belt while most pictures are waist. One lock at the front - no key in it - and the front is all shielded and part of the belt. It's so weird thinking about where that's supposed to go.
                                          It's got the little rings on the side like wtf that's not standard is it? On the website it looks like that's extra.

                                          Vanessa Why have you changed your mind,to not give it a try?

                                          If they put it in my room with the key I'd try it even if never reading here I think I'd be curious but argh yes I want to try my belt. Calling it that is weird.
                                          I don't want my parents to control me like this. Trying it changes things. I reject the whole concept.

                                          Vanessa I strongly doubt they say it's ok and put it in the bin without any talks...

                                          But what I say is what I can control if I'm clear and calm about it in advance. I can argue I shouldn't be grounded but if I lose its ok. I can't argue about the belt I can't stay calm but I can just stick with no. So I don't need to listen to them about it I can just be stubborn.

                                          Angelina i always wonder why it wasn't talked about calmly beforehand.

                                          There was a talk before it arrived, but what I agreed to was like crushing me. I feel better now than back then.

                                          James Vanessa said it. I don't want to talk about it.

                                                    Jen it's a hip belt

                                                    Less restrictive about clothes.

                                                    Jen and the front is all shielded and part of the belt.

                                                    Yes,no detachable secondary shield on My-Steel ones.

                                                    Jen It's got the little rings on the side like wtf that's not standard is it? On the website it looks like that's extra.

                                                    It is for making possible to use thigh bands.

                                                    Jen If they put it in my room with the key I'd try it even if never reading here I think I'd be curious but argh yes I want to try my belt. Calling it that is weird.

                                                    I can understand you're curious about ti.

                                                    Jen I don't want my parents to control me like this. Trying it changes things. I reject the whole concept.

                                                    And if you has the key in your hand?

                                                    Jen But what I say is what I can control if I'm clear and calm about it in advance. I can argue I shouldn't be grounded but if I lose its ok. I can't argue about the belt I can't stay calm but I can just stick with no. So I don't need to listen to them about it I can just be stubborn.

                                                    I understand your reaction,but I think it would be a bit tense at your home,at least for some time...

                                                    Good luck;I hope you would be able to avoid it,without too many restrictions!

                                                    • Jen replied to this.

                                                                  Jen Got it. I thought you meant personality. Sorry.

                                                                  The rings are for the thighbands, which is what @Angelina wears.

                                                                  Jen But what I say is what I can control if I'm clear and calm about it in advance. I can argue I shouldn't be grounded but if I lose its ok. I can't argue about the belt I can't stay calm but I can just stick with no. So I don't need to listen to them about it I can just be stubborn.

                                                                  True. But you may need to be for a long while.

                                                                        James The rings are for the thighbands

                                                                        Yes I read those threads but was surprised to see they were ordered. Some of the writing about thighbands seems the most unbelievable.

                                                                        Vanessa And if you has the key in your hand?

                                                                        This is hard to answer it's not something I expect. I best not take it I think yes if they offer this then it is part of their trying to change my mind.

                                                                              Jen If they put it in my room with the key I'd try it even if never reading here I think I'd be curious but argh yes I want to try my belt. Calling it that is weird.
                                                                              I don't want my parents to control me like this. Trying it changes things. I reject the whole concept.

                                                                              The risk is the key is not the key of the lock.
                                                                              If the find out you tried the belt bay asking you and they will know if you lie or not than you did the first step on the road to wear it 24/7.

                                                                              Jen But what I say is what I can control if I'm clear and calm about it in advance. I can argue I shouldn't be grounded but if I lose its ok. I can't argue about the belt I can't stay calm but I can just stick with no. So I don't need to listen to them about it I can just be stubborn.

                                                                              I agreed with this tactic. It is a good way.
                                                                              If you feel unsure and need additional help call Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800.

                                                                                    They just don't get it. I've mostly avoided them today but a little talk and they say they understand it is a big step and want to offer me a new phone as a reward when I get started with the belt. Like I don't even need a new phone and that they think this is some kind of good deal...

                                                                                      Jen Some of the writing about thighbands seems the most unbelievable.

                                                                                      Agree.

                                                                                      Jen Yes I read those threads but was surprised to see they were ordered.

                                                                                      They are useful to avoid stimulation. It is pretty logical you have to use them (if finally you agree to wear the belt).
                                                                                      Anyway, if you think the right is wear the belt, wear it, if you think it is not the right choice, do not wear it.