Been gone a while
Vanessa You would not be able to post much here,so...
I'll just have to keep my posts really simple from now on:
Non-consensual chastity bad.
Consensual chastity good.
I'm feeling unbelievably frustrated but unbelievably productive.
I am happy in my belt, it's a life-goal, so don't listen to me whining about it.
I hope everyone has a really great day/week/year/life!!
ah ok, sorry sometimes my english gets to its limits and i get things wrong because one word i don't know is different. and yes i admit with us it was also a different situation because i could only free her but she couldn't free me.
Vanessa You would not be able to post much here,so...
definitely not, I look at my watch and ... Oh 55 minutes and I still have a lot to answer 
Vanessa But,in this case,I must stay on a "friend level" until the next talk,not be his/her girlfriend.
i find it frankly interesting that your parents think they can influence whether you love someone, that was a lesson my father had to learn too (you remember i wasn't allowed to have a relationship until i was 18) but he learned that love is not controllable and certainly not who you love
Vanessa Have you already opened her belt,or was it always her who opened it?
uh... i think you forgot that camryn hasn't worn the belt since august (see in should i become a keyholder?). since we decided against it, the belt has been in her wardrobe. but there is still the possibility that she wears my old neosteel belt when we get married, it doesn't fit perfectly, but it should be enough for the occasion. 
Laura But since you have a partner now it doesn't make sense anymore
I'm sure my mom would say it doesn't matter if I have a partner or not masturbation is still bad and shouldn't be done.
Jonas Well, if you do ever find yourself falling into old habits, you'll know what to do!
Suuuuuuuure
youdontknowme If he knows you are such a compulsive masturbator that you need a chastity belt to keep you in check, who is to say it will not go back on as fast as it came off
. Especially if he seems to find your belt quite hot, he might enjoy being your only source of relief.
I can't say that I'm totally against the idea Altough I'd like to start slowly to see if we both enjoy it if it's brought up.
youdontknowme That said, that would not be for him alone to decide, such things need to be consensual. But considering you are kept belted until you marry, he seems to have the better bargaining position.
Totally agree chastity can be fun and hot but if there's no consent it's neither.
carg I think either way it is a (symbolic) transfer of power to his husband. If they want an equal relationship, I'm not sure that such a symbolic gesture is quite fitting on their wedding day, even though it would be a romantic one. (Unless the boyfriend also wears a chastity device for the wedding, and the exchange of keys is mutual, like Vanessa is considering.)
We do have and are planning on having an equal relationship (except in bad of course ) and you're right I don't think it would be a good wedding gift unless something changes before that happens. About my bf wearing a chastity belt, I could never see that happening thb 
but you never know both people wearing a belt in the relationship could work for some people.
youdontknowme Yeah, the fact that it might cement an inequality may be a concern.
Yes I'd say it would be unless he wants me to stay locked (not very likely especially not for long times) and we change our minds about having an equal relationship, which also isn't very likely.
I would doubt that a mother who disapproves of masturbation would approve of pre-marital sex. Otherwise, your boyfriend having the key would have some advantages. If he can keep you sexually satisfied, you might have less desire to masturbate. It would probably be a bad idea for you to bring up the fact that it might actually result in less masturbation though, if you admit that you are still relieving yourself on a regular basis, you can probably kiss your private hygiene breaks goodbye.
Still, she will probably not let your boyfriend have the keys for a while. Maybe until you get married, but you might get lucky and have him take over the keys if you move out and are closer to him than to her. If only for practical reasons. I think that was @Nate's experience.
Laura She definitely wouldn't, but she would tell you a true reason
Her reasons for not allowing masturbation are religious.
Laura Like everyone else, but her
Yes, exactly.
youdontknowme I would doubt that a mother who disapproves of masturbation would approve of pre-marital sex.
She is very against pre-marital sex which is another reason for my belt.
youdontknowme Otherwise, your boyfriend having the key would have some advantages. If he can keep you sexually satisfied, you might have less desire to masturbate.
Less masturbation isn't enough for her, the only acceptable thing is no masturbation at all. But I agree with you that him having my key would be great.
youdontknowme It would probably be a bad idea for you to bring up the fact that it might actually result in less masturbation though, if you admit that you are still relieving yourself on a regular basis, you can probably kiss your private hygiene breaks goodbye.
That's very true, if I tell her giving him the key would make me masturbate less she'd freak out and question me on when I've been able to masturbate and then I think most my privacy would be gone.
youdontknowme Still, she will probably not let your boyfriend have the keys for a while. Maybe until you get married, but you might get lucky and have him take over the keys if you move out and are closer to him than to her. If only for practical reasons. I think that was @Nate's experience.
She's said I won't have control over the keys until I'm married, moving in with him could result in him being given the keys for convince but I think that if I do move in with him before marriage then she'd be worried he'd just give me the keys and then I'd be free to be sinful and greedy (masturbate).
Angelina I would say that masturbation should not be an issue because your partner should take care of your sexual needs, but I doubt your mother will accept that as an argument.
Yeah it really shouldn't be an issue but try telling my mom that
Funguy Less masturbation isn't enough for her, the only acceptable thing is no masturbation at all. But I agree with you that him having my key would be great.
With less desire to masturbate I did not mean a desire to masturbate less, but a desire to masturbate that is low enough that it can be controlled without physical restraints - a way to make sure that your desire to masturbate is weaker than your desire to make your mother happy and not engage in such sinful behavior.
But again, if she is as much against premarital sex as she is against masturbation, this is all a non-starter. The only way your boyfriend could even hope to have the key before you are properly married is if you were moving away far enough from your mom that her managing your releases became impractical (and could offer a good reason for why you are moving there).
And of course she might also be worried that if he has your keys, he might use them for pre-marital sex. Be glad if she does not ask him to get locked up if you plan to move in together before marriage.
Really, your most realistic plans are to work on financial independence and/or marriage, unless you want to threaten legal action against your mother, of course, but you do not seem to be the kind of person who would do that.
youdontknowme With less desire to masturbate I did not mean a desire to masturbate less, but a desire to masturbate that is low enough that it can be controlled without physical restraints
Okay I understand now sorry about my misunderstanding.
youdontknowme if she is as much against premarital sex as she is against masturbation
I can assure you that she is.
youdontknowme The only way your boyfriend could even hope to have the key before you are properly married is if you were moving away far enough from your mom that her managing your releases became impractical (and could offer a good reason for why you are moving there).
Yeah that’s the only way other than marriage I can see for getting out of the belt, the problem is I don’t think my mom would accept any reason for me to move so far away I couldn’t visit once a week for cleaning. There’s a possibility it could work but I’m not counting on it.
youdontknowme And of course she might also be worried that if he has your keys, he might use them for pre-marital sex.
That is her main concern when it comes to our relationship at the moment and is the reason that she will never give either of us the keys until we’re married.
youdontknowme Be glad if she does not ask him to get locked up if you plan to move in together before marriage.
I don’t think she would to be honest although it’s not impossible tbat she does ask that if we move in together although I don’t see the point since even if he’s locked if she doesn’t hold both of our keys we’d be able to unlock ourselves and be sinful.
youdontknowme Really, your most realistic plans are to work on financial independence and/or marriage,
Yeah that is the plan we have at the moment. Get married and move out and then I’ll be free.
youdontknowme unless you want to threaten legal action against your mother, of course, but you do not seem to be the kind of person who would do that.
You’re right, I don’t want to take any legal action against her.
Funguy I don’t think my mom would accept any reason for me to move so far away I couldn’t visit once a week for cleaning. There’s a possibility it could work but I’m not counting on it.
Yeah, moving away just to get away from her control would probably not work, but if a good job/education opportunity presents itself... hard to plan for that, though.
Funguy That is her main concern when it comes to our relationship at the moment and is the reason that she will never give either of us the keys until we’re married.
I think it is amazing that someone who objects to masturbation and premarital sex on religious grounds would be so open to gay marriage. That plus the private hygiene breaks make your mom seem almost reasonable. That is, by the standards of people who force their kids into chastity belts, which is not a particularly high standard.
Funguy I don’t see the point since even if he’s locked if she doesn’t hold both of our keys we’d be able to unlock ourselves and be sinful.
Yeah, I was thinking of her (or his parents, if they agree to it) holding his keys. After all, if he is free and you share a bed you could still get up to "sinful" things even with your penis out of commission.
Funguy You’re right, I don’t want to take any legal action against her.
No need to plan on following through with it to bring it up in a negotiation, though you would have a hard time appearing convincing, and even if you did you might suffer other consequences, like loss of financial support for at least some time.
- Edited
youdontknowme Especially if he seems to find your belt quite hot, he might enjoy being your only source of relief.
Funguy I can't say that I'm totally against the idea
My wife treats key-holding in a matter of fact, practical, kind of way, but she did admit one time to finding it pretty hot. Aside from control type stuff, I guess it depends on whether key-holding partners get off on faithfulness and exclusivity. I mean obviously I can't have sex with anyone else, ever, but not even being able to masturbate while thinking of someone else is some next level sh*t.