Getting used to My-Steel Female Total
@audioguy58 mentioned one recently
Joh Are you kidding?
How old is your future husband that he lets his mother dictate how often he has sex with his wife?
He should grow up before he gets married.
No, she is not kidding. I don't know how old her intended is but it seems he is quite a bit more mature than you. He is marrying into a family, not taking it by storm.
ZeynepFox But maybe - at the beginning - his mother may want to observe and supervise the amount of sex we have
I also think such limitation should be good for both at the beginning.
ZeynepFox There is nothing wrong with the concept of preventing transgression.
Also it can be used when you are not supposed to have sex for religious or other reasons.
ZeynepFox My future mother-in-law certainly does not want us to spend our first week in marriage in the bedroom only.
This should be recommended to everyone.
Avery No, she is not kidding. I don't know how old her intended is but it seems he is quite a bit more mature than you. He is marrying into a family, not taking it by storm.
Part of growing up is becoming independent from your parents and making your own decisions. Of course it is good to listen to what your parents say about important things in life. But the decision is up to you.
From what @ZeynepFox has written so far, her future husband will make the decisions. He has to stand his ground and clearly define what is his area. The mother cannot make a decision here, otherwise he makes a fool of himself.
Whether they are in bed all the time or do something else is entirely up to them. If the parents have done their education properly, they will certainly come to a sensible decision.
Joh He has to stand his ground and clearly define what is his area. The mother cannot make a decision here, otherwise he makes a fool of himself.
Whether they are in bed all the time or do something else is entirely up to them. If the parents have done their education properly, they will certainly come to a sensible decision.
Wake up, this is a completely different culture. We have at least one person here that is over 30 and has been locked up by parents for more than ten years. Do you want to editorialize on that? I'll bet they have a happy life.
ZeynepFox Turkish brides can get a certificate of chastity by gynecologists in Turkey or by Muslim gynecologists in Germany. If you want, I can upload mine after receiving it.
that would be interesting, but does it only apply to muslims (I'm just asking out of curiosity)?
ZeynepFox You can go to a Muslim gynecologist
do only muslim gynaecologists do this? i have never read about it from german ones.
ZeynepFox But maybe - at the beginning - his mother may want to observe and supervise the amount of sex we have. I don't know yet.
but after the wedding, no one but the two of you will be interested.
HHelen I also think such limitation should be good for both at the beginning.
for what reason? especially at the beginning of a marriage, sex life is something very special and intimate, which makes the promise of marriage even more valuable 
Angelina that would be interesting, but does it only apply to muslims (I'm just asking out of curiosity)?
I would imagine kuffar's words are less trusted in the circles that pay a lot of attention to those traditional customs. Similarly,
Angelina do only muslim gynaecologists do this? i have never read about it from german ones.
I would not expect doctors with more western values being too keen on providing such services.
There is probably some merit to the whole "different culture" discussion, but how much is probably not something to which there is a one-size-fits-all answer. It is true that western civilization places a heavier emphasis on "the newlywed couple will start a new life of their own" aspect than some other cultures in the world, so I would not consider it unreasonable for parents to play a big role in the couple's life. But "different culture" only excuses so much, as plenty of atrocities and self-destructive behavior have been defended as tradition in the past.
youdontknowme But "different culture" only excuses so much
Completely agree, but saying rotten things about her future husband, and I realize YOU didn't post what I objected to, because he follows the culture he grew up in is not productive, I don't think.
Avery I think it can be seen as a side effect of the discussion getting rather heated. Personally, I feel like not letting the newlyweds breed like rabbits while there are still family functions to attend is one of the mildest values dissonances in this topic, compared to stuff like regular hymen inspections and a cultural norm of female submission, both of which I find highly objectionable if not based on freely-given consent. To point out that feels like the straw that broke the camel's back after it had been loaded with boulders already.
youdontknowme compared to stuff like regular hymen inspections and a cultural norm of female submission, both of which I find highly objectionable
Yup.
Angelina that would be interesting, but does it only apply to muslims (I'm just asking out of curiosity)?
Don't give parents such a crazy idea.