Jen
What you have written seems very recognizable to me, and I myself had written similar things about my experiences.
I accept that they are not something especially comfortable, but I have even gone for ice cream with them.
To be at home or to sleep, no girl needs more movement than thighbands allow.
Sometimes I think there is a lot of drama in the world of chastity belts, and I am convinced that there is because there are many people with negative feelings.
Thighbands with padlock
Ines Sometimes I think there is a lot of drama in the world of chastity belts, and I am convinced that there is because there are many people with negative feelings.
As much as I currently evangelize the belt and have come to understand the anti-masturbation POV, I can still very much understand why those unfortunate enough to be thighbanded at night would resent their situation. It feels like you are a bit less of a person to be denied freedom of movement others possess simply to minimize the chance of self-pleasure. There are keyholders who consider the comfort of their charge to be a sacrifice they are willing to make!
It is evident that the keyholders who abuse are the main causes of this perspective of the girls.
I understand why I wear them sometimes and it really doesn't seem like anything terrible to me either.
It is just like I ask to open my belt for a shower if I need to, and I do not think it is a crime either.
On the other hand, if you do not like wearing the belt, everything that makes it a little more effective seems like a world.
Ines It is evident that the keyholders who abuse are the main causes of this perspective of the girls.
From many perspectives, the belt itself is abusive, so I’m not surprised at this response from anyone who didn’t discover the belt themselves. Even a convinced wearer at some point didn’t want it.
Ines On the other hand, if you do not like wearing the belt, everything that makes it a little more effective seems like a world.
True. If I had been invited to wear a belt in college, I would have reluctantly accepted, but thighbands would have caused great resentment and frustration.
Ines Sometimes I think there is a lot of drama in the world of chastity belts, and I am convinced that there is because there are many people with negative feelings.
Thighbands were easier than I thought - yeah I could cope at home at night. But the feeling of control is just something else - like the belt is just about blocking access - but the bands are controlling how you move.
Jen Yeah. The belt is surprisingly easy to live with in everyday life. Bands send the clear message at all times that your feelings are not as important as stopping even a minuscule chance at forbidden sensations.
Saintprudence Bands send the clear message at all times that your feelings are not as important as stopping even a minuscule chance at forbidden sensations.
Depends what your feelings are though - like ignore daytime, but nightime I think bands are more about the feeling of control than the inconvenience or even stopping sensations. And if you wear the belt for safety anyway does the extra control feel like extra safety?
Trying it changed my thoughts
Angelina agreed. Any chastity equipment feels different when you know you can take it off at any time.
Though I teased Jen about asking for thighbands at night, that would actually be a bad idea because it would end up inevitably being locked into her nightly routine.
Saintprudence Any chastity equipment feels different when you know you can take it off at any time.
Totally agree, it's voluntary use makes a difference. That is why another use seems so abhorrent to me.
Jen I even used the d-rings on my belt.
I didn't remember your belt having D-RINGS. It seems strange to me that you ordered one with them.
Ines I didn't remember your belt having D-RINGS. It seems strange to me that you ordered one with them.
I seem to recall that they were added without her knowledge to the order and she was quite upset to find out at first. The design of her belt wasn’t really her choice.
Saintprudence Though I teased Jen about asking for thighbands at night, that would actually be a bad idea because it would end up inevitably being locked into her nightly routine.
well, the question is of course how @Jen herself sees her situation. if she wants to stay chaste she has to see how hard she fights and whether thighbands would make sense. it's always quite an investment, so she should think about it carefully.
Jen Yeah it was parents. Pru has it right
I wonder if your parents have thought about thighbands? otherwise the rings wouldn't make sense.
Angelina otherwise the rings wouldn't make sense.
Although I'd add that in comparison to the price of a high-quality custom-made belt, the surcharge of D-rings, O-Rings, or whatever connection adapters used for the respective model, is quasi negligible. (AFAIK, even with the 3 Rings/Adapters recommended by certain popular manufacturers, it's still less then 100 € surcharge. Compared to an order of magnitude more for the belt itself...)
Of course I'm aware of the "not so nice" social aspect of altering her order without her OK first. I dislike moves behind someones back. Particularly for a topic that for so many is so strongly associated with bonding, reliability, trust and care.
Just in the matter itself, it was economically smart to add them out-of-the-box, because it allows options. (And No, uninformed partners, parents, etc. reading this, options should not mean arbitrarily adding accessories to someone else's belt for no reasons. But I might come to that some other time.) I see the risk for handling keyholding unwisely.
And as a short interjection: Angelina, I'm sorry to read, how your personal introduction to the topic had been handled; much has been written about that already. Though I am amazed how constructively and positively you've handled it.
Yet speaking of risk, avoiding the topic of accessories is risky as well. You know better than I the reports of users that didn't start with accessories but at some point of point actually benefited from them or simply wanted to try.
Actually, there is some really prominent user of this forum who has always been wondering how it was with bands, but couldn't even privately experiment since her Tollyboy hasn't been delivered with D-Rings. I wouldn't say whom I was talking about, now. ;-)
So, even if buyers believe to be sure they wouldn't need rings in the foreseeable future, I'd always recommend adding them to the cart. If possible, take those that nicely fold in, when not in use; then forget about them unless further accessories are already agreed on. (Again, be fair to whoever is involved!)
Adding them after the initial order would either require paying way more money later (incl. doubled shipping), or significant DIY tinkering (don't know if adding rings on your own might even waiver warranty?), plus extra waiting time in which you have to somehow compensate for the missing custom belt. Stupid ideas in this context are the bigger risk, IMO.