George some poor lazy persons sell their "sexuality" for a car, or a place to sleep or tuition fees.

"Poor lazy person" seems like a rather judgmental choice of words there. And I think the issue is not so much the quid-pro-quo involved, but more whether the "bribe" in question is something that patents would customarily provide with fewer strings attached, or that grown-up children even have a widely-recognized right to. Which would depend a lot on location of course, and applies more to shelter and education than to something like a car or monetary gifts.

George And no, none of them involved something as benign as a chastity belt.

Now I am imagining what would make 23/7 physical restraint look benign. It is not just about not having free reign to have sex, that is quite a common policy whose enforcement has varying degrees of success. It is also about an unyielding piece of metal clamped to the wearer's body all day and night, in a place that is fairly high-maintenance no less, and all the struggles that come with that.

You brought up emotional stressful relationships already, but those may not strictly be an either/or deal - the belt may well be a symptom or even a catalyst for an exhausting parent-child relationship.

George One thing that I think many people question is how so many "children/(young) adults" don't simply run to the authorities. The whole scale of voluntary to involuntary wearing, because it's certainly not a simply binary question.

Then especially family provides for the young not only economic resources, but usually also things like a home, social contacts, education, …

I think what people don't realize that situations are individual and complicated.

That is why I do not necessarily think of anti-abuse resources as the first resort, but knowledge of one's rights and recourses can be a bargaining chip in any discussions about those things.

    youdontknowme

    youdontknowme "Poor lazy person" seems like a rather judgmental choice of words there. And I think the issue is not so much the quid-pro-quo involved, but more whether the "bribe" in question is something that patents would customarily provide with fewer strings attached, or that grown-up children even have a widely-recognized right to. Which would depend a lot on location of course, and applies more to shelter and education than to something like a car or monetary gifts.

    I've seen more than once words applied that suggested that wearers should just forego the "unnecessary comforts", and one can also study without having your parents pay your way or your car.

    (I wouldn't know. OTOH, I do remember a girl who I picked during my student days, which was a bit surprised about my car. All students had a car with motorized leather seats and walnut on their console, right? I mean perhaps not in the evil USA but in our good old socialized Europe, in the good old days when I was young and beautiful, that must have been in part of the basic student aid package, right?)

    youdontknowme Now I am imagining what would make 23/7 physical restraint look benign.

    Let's say, physical torments disappear. Or at least, disappear much easier.

    Psychological abuses (even if not sexual), form who you are.

    The classical list includes (but is not complete, I would have again probably thing for some time, age and Covid make be forgetful 😅 :

    • highly dominating parents (in one case I had at least one family, where the kids got literally the wrong "roles" for the inheritance assigned, my then girlfriend was basically doing anything but to take begging publicly on knees to be trained to take over the company, while the younger son wanted to be an engineer, but guess who was penciled in for a JD & MBA? Two very good consumers to psychologists as adults resulted, but then the family was relatively reach, their company had over 1000 employees.

    • parents who use kids as substitute partner (non-sexual). Non-funny. And very crazy family life if one parent decides that the partner is not mature enough to take important decisions, and starts to discuss serious family, business, investment decisions with a 14 years old kid.

    • add hyper helicoptering as opt-on. Clean anything behind the kid as much. Sounds cool, but if not done carefully can leave the kid totally unprepared for the real world living in an alternative reality. Especially if the protective bubble is ever lifted.

    • add total ignoring parents. Parenting by handing over a credit card, but they are good parents, they might look even once a year at the report card, and ask twice a year the servants if the kid is eating healthy. (Now to defend my parents here, my sisters where real assholes that took much more of their attention. Being the good kid who always had good grades and never needed the lawyer, in one word boring, had his advantages/disadvantages.)

    • talking bad about your kids, literally. I had literally parents who talked down their own kids. Basically destroyed their self-worth. (Mine might not have build up mine much, but at least they sold me always to the outside as a mix of Davinci and Jesus the Almighty, one tries to learn to deal with the embarrassment.) In front of the kids. How they are useless, will never be worth anything, achieve anything.

    The problem is I could continue the list. Some of that stuff is obvious, some is not so obvious, especially is you are used to it, and you stand there how can you stand it, but for the persons involved, this is their life.

      George I agree parenting is not an easy task and some do it not right. Nevertheless most kids have a deep bond with their parents and what they do to them must feel total wrong If they would break up the relationship.
      From some age I expect a men or women in chastity they are able to oversee the long time effect of their decision in one or the other way. Especially when they got the relevant information at the Forum. Finally it is their life.
      If they come to the conclusion the situation is not so bad and what they get from their parents is a good bargain why not live with it. I have no problem with that as long as I feel it is a sound decision.

      George Hitachi magic wand is everything a female with a chastity belt needs, and basically no belt can be so well tailored to prevent a Q-tip coming under the shield.

      I don't know about the situation with women, but wearing two models of belts (and probably more than 10 models of cages) I had no problems with coming during stimulation with a wand vibrator.

      George nd basically no belt can be so well tailored to prevent a Q-tip coming under the shield.

      Or use a feather 😃

      George I've seen more than once words applied that suggested that wearers should just forego the "unnecessary comforts", and one can also study without having your parents pay your way or your car.

      Have not seen much of that myself. Any encouragement to pack your bags and run has been when people have already been considering it. Like Lukas with his sister, who was prepared to do that, but, partially because he had that option, was able to come to an agreement everyone involved could live with.

      George Let's say, physical torments disappear. Or at least, disappear much easier.

      Oh yeah, the lasting input of emotional abuse and poor support cannot be neglected, but that is also not something that running away would fix.

      Plus you need to take into account that use of physical restraints like chastity devices non-consensually is, in itself, closely tied to emotional abuse. Either as a symptom or even as a catalyst by sparking more conflict between the two parties. Restraining someone's body against their will is pretty much the ultimate sign of distrust, treating someone as if they are as uncivilized as a wild animal. To say nothing about the little abuses tied to involuntary belt wear, like loss of privacy, schedules for the performance of basic self-care and what not.

      Now, this is obviously much less severe in quid-pro-quo chastity arrangements than it is in coercion that relies on threats of violence or ostracism. But non-consensual chastity is not an alternative to emotional abuse, but a companion.

      George female with a chastity belt needs, and basically no belt can be so well tailored to prevent a Q-tip coming under the shield.

      While this may be true (I’ve never attempted) for me at least, I’m sure many others are different, my belt prevents me doing this mostly in a mental capacity. If that makes sense.
      I agreed to this system realizing my self destructive behavior, and feel very wrong attempting/succeeding in cheating this barrier.
      Many factors play into this of course. Mainly that I agree it was an addiction, and that once I’d gotten past the withdrawal (for lack of a better word) it’s not a great physical issue not having it.
      Hopefully that makes sense explaining why my belt at least does work in preventing it.

      On the topic of abuse though. Many kids/people stay in the abusive environment despite knowing it’s wrong. And I’m talking about SA and physical. It’s so much deeper than simply going to the relevant authorities as you and others mentioned

      George it can be very complicated and painful to cut that virtual umbilical with their parents when they really become independent. Redefining that relationship with your parents is hard, IMHO.

      I think everyone goes through some anguish the first time they make a big decision that their parents don't approve of.

      For me it was my husband. My parents didn't approve of him and I wanted to marry him. They never threatened to disinherit me or cut me out of their life or anything like that, but it was still difficult to trust my own judgement when the people who had guided me my whole life were telling me to do something different.

      For some people it's their career, their educational choices, or something else, but making your own decisions is part of becoming an adult, and I think it's often difficult at first.

        MissBlossom From your posts, I'd say marrying your husband was a wise choice, if difficult.
        Did they eventually accept him?

          Tonyand03 Did they eventually accept him?

          I wouldn't say they ever "didn't accept" him. He was never unwelcome in their home and they paid for the wedding.

          They just tried to convince me that he wouldn't be a good husband.

          At the time he had only worked part time jobs and they thought he had a poor work ethic, but I knew him better. He was very responsible and he always kept his word. They thought I was making excuses for him because I was in love.

          I knew in my heart that if he married me he would take care of me, and he did. We've never been rich, but we always made ends meet.

          And once they saw how hard he worked after we were married, they did admit that I was right about him.

          MissBlossom

          I think everyone goes through some anguish the first time they make a big decision that their parents don't approve

          I have so much anguish about my decisions even when my parents do approve.

            WriterAlexis Offtopic. It seems you have received a registration confirmation e-mail to you hotmail address. It worked this time. However I still don't recommend to use hotmail or outlook mailboxes for this purpose

            George So the old fashioned "think and engage your brain, potentially google some stuff" technique is the best we have.

            Doesn't take much thinking lol

            I might archive this thread if people are okay with it? It's derailed significantly from the original topic, so I feel like those conversations might be better left in a dedicated thread for them?

            • Joh likes this.
            8 days later

            George that @Angelina is real and stand alone from @Laura. Is it a fantasy? Probably not, because the site is rather somber.

            I always didn't care if someone really believes me or not, but clearly I'm not paid by Laura to post here 😂

            According to what I said, I come from a similar situation (I was a minor at the beginning and was locked in a belt against my will), but I also have doubts about some of the stories here. But I have to make one thing clear: I leave it up to each user here to decide whether he/she believes my story and the other way around I never say openly whether I believe a story or not because it's not my job, I think in any case users have to decide for themselves

            13 days later
            6 days later