Hello, my bf of many years has recently expressed desire to wear a cage. We’ve experimented a few times and he loves it. I’m not typically a person who likes to control/be in charge - I’m a total bottom lol. So I’m struggling to “get into it” so to speak. He’s been very helpful in expressing what he wants out of it (no sissification, ok with some long term wear, etc). Just looking for some advice/info from other women KH’s who have been in my same position. Thx.

    Hello and Welcome, please feel invited to introduce yourself in the matching thread.
    Regarding your language it seems like you have already done some research in fetish forums and wikis.
    What is your bfs motivation to be chaste? Is it a fetish? Is it Nofap? Lifestyle?

      Max9 it’s a fetish. He doesn’t have a desire to be chaste or nofap.

      • Max9 replied to this.

          Joh thank you for that link. He already has a few different cages he likes.

            NewKH I see. Well, we, the members of this community, don't have very much experience with fetish games, but we know a lot about chastity belts and cages and about what a keyholder has to take care of.

            We have a giant base of information in the existing threads.
            If you have any questions, feel free to ask

                Max9 thanks for the help - I didn’t realize the label meant anything.

                  you might want to try chastity mansion.com may be more applicable to your needs

                  NewKH

                  hello 🙂
                  even though i can understand your concern, you will probably only be able to get technical information about the belts here. we are not a forum that knows much about fetishes and that is not our main point here either.

                    NewKH I’m not typically a person who likes to control/be in charge - I’m a total bottom lol.

                    You don't have to be a total dominatrix or anything... Just do things YOUR way. I would suggest a rule where he's not even allowed to talk about it (unless it requires medical attention or something). There's nothing more annoying than listening to a boy complain about how horny they are when they asked to be locked up, so ban it from the start. Pretend it doesn't even exist. Only let him out when you want it, not when he wants to. Maybe try a double-or-nothing rule, where if he brings it up after a week in chastity, he gets another week before you'll even consider letting him out. This will stop it from becoming the sole focus of your relationship. HE'll be thinking about it all the time, but you don't have to!

                    He should know and accept that making out with you won't necessarily come to a conclusion for him. It's quite okay for you to roll over and say "Thanks for that. Goodnight!" That's his problem.

                    Think about the things you want to improve in your relationship... maybe it's more foreplay for you, or maybe he needs to cook more often or something like that. He'll soon be on his best behaviour! Your partner is getting what he wants out of all this, so it's important that you do too. ;-)

                    Have fun and remember, it's quite okay to put it in the drawer for a little while if you feel it's becoming too much or otherwise detracting from your relationship. And it's also quite okay for you to say "I think it's about time you put this back on!" after he's had a break.

                    If you like being dominated, maybe try using Emlalock for keyholding, and set up some fun games like wheel of fortune to determine whether either of you get to play or not. ;-)

                    • Joh likes this.
                      4 months later