Open question

Renita
Yes, and it sounds like part of the answer is that she would risk being ostracized by her whole family.

MissBlossom I. Laura case, or in general? I think she is in a relatively unique situation where such a threat is possible.

pestulens think she is in a relatively unique situation where such a threat is possible

@Vanessa was in the same situation

pestulens
I was only talking about @Laura, but obviously other people could be in a similar situation.

Laura I guess it depends on the family. I know if my brother or sister asked us to ostraciz one of their kids over something like that, the rest of us would look at them like they grew s second head.

pestulens
Ah, family

Now if you only could rely on family being always honest.

They might tell you to ostracize them for completely different reasons, that will sound very reasonable to you.
And potentially hard to verify reasons.

Family has the big drawback, from my experience:

• you do not get to pick them.
• they might share your last name with you. (Depending upon how distinctive your family name is, that means you get associated with say a black sheep, if you are unlucky, and said black sheep gains public notoriety.)

Nowhere in this list I see anything that would make family more honest than any random person

Laura The family won't hurt you at least intentionally

George's point is that this may be true of many families, but certainly not of all of them. As he said, you do not get to pick them.

youdontknowme I can say so about mine

George All true, but you do know them. If you have a family member who is untrustworthy, you would know that about them in advance whereas with a random stranger, you don't.

Joh Sorry, I can't confirm that. It depends on the family and it's great if it's like that with you.

Eden Knight's family deliberately destroyed her life.
https://socdoneleft.substack.com/p/a-timeline-for-eden-knight

Laura The family won't hurt you at least intentionally

It all depends on what kind of family it is. The family is usually a great support for a person, but there are also various pathologies that can lead to harm.

Andrew

Yes, but it is strange, and bad families have social rejection

Ines Unfortunately, there are many such families. The vast majority of my former professional work consisted in contacts with them - juvenile delinquency does not come out of nowhere, it is usually the result of coming from a dysfunctional family.

Andrew While I wouldn’t call mine dysfunctional, it was the lack of constant oversight that allowed my behavior. But it couldn’t be helped.

Sasha Yeah, I joked sometimes that I was not parented at all. My parents have careers, societal responsibilities, and well, whatever resources they allocated to parenting, the others which were brats on steroids consumed.

Which leads to as @Andrew nicely put to interesting pathological situations.

And while it @Laura is right too, families tend not to harm members intentionally. Usually. BUT there is a big catch here:

Rina Eden Knight's family deliberately destroyed her life.
https://socdoneleft.substack.com/p/a-timeline-for-eden-knight

Do you think Eden's family thought they have harmed Eden? They only did it to help him become "normal".
(Besides, being female is in Saudi culture inferior, so why would a male want to be a female?)

Families might have quite convoluted values, beliefs, traditions.

I literally had one, that refused a daughter needed and relatively easy (as a small kid) surgery, because they took it as a sign of God (or whatever, hard to grasp the thinking of some of these people), leading to their daughter being hampered when walking, and dangerous surgery as an adult to help the situation (if not fix, a bit late for this, the whole bone system has developed wrongly). So yes, familial beliefs can lead indirectly to physical harm too.

Take on the other hand, that recommendations on parenting, well potentially even on "healthy eating", can and do vary by the decade and country/state. (Laws do also change, but what is even more of a trap, enforcement of laws can dramatically change over time too.)

We literally have generations of adults still around that learned, masturbation is bad (Why? well, because). Got news for you, there are still places, even in the so-called civilized West, where this is more or less taught to kids/young adults.

My observation was only, that in "better-off families", it's often even harder to get out of reach of the family (for many reasons, including that alarming the authorities will not work and/or is a very unattractive option in many ways), so I've seen purely in my limited circle of acquaintances so rather fascinating (like watching the Texas Chainsaw Massacre) menu of pathologies. To use that nicely sounding, educated word.

Sasha it was the lack of constant oversight that allowed my behavior.

Since it was sorted out later, it was just a mistake

Philip Would you move out of your family home?

I think so, the privacy would be nice, and I'd like to have my home set up much differently then how my parents do!

Philip Would you continue to wear the belt after moving out of your family home?

I think so, but I'd have the keys to myself, or IF I ever have a partner, them. idk if I'd like my mother having them after I move out

CutiedeTahlia but I'd have the keys to myself

It's pointless.

CutiedeTahlia idk if I'd like my mother having them after I move out

Why not if not far?