Angelina talk to your mother about your future and that you are unhappy with the current situation
I did and how I know her opinion.
Vanessa Are you dating someone,presently?
Yes and I'm in active search.
Vanessa Do you think she would?
Ofc not. But it would be a good argument.
Vanessa And if she does it,would you accept to keep wearing it too?
As a small revenge.
Was it the effect you hoped for,or a side-effect?
If it is an unexpected side effect,do you like it or not?
I certainly wanted to be more active and so the fact that the chastity/frustration is fuelling this is great. I also wanted to do more around the house.
Compliance was not really the aim as we don't really have a dom/sub relationship, however, I do have a problem with authority and so it is very, very, good for me to do what I am told... especially by someone whom I love and trust.
I do feel her pain as her situation is similar to mine
Angelina it seems appropriate to me, i don't have an exact reason, but i think everyone needs at least one perspective
Mine is when married.
Angelina That's what I mean too, that's why I say it's a matter of balance.
I don't think it is relevant if she has no job...
Not much choice in this case.
Angelina she can argue against it but i don't think it's appropriate for a mother and keyholder not to care.
I agree,but it seems it the case for her...
Christine Yes and I'm in active search.
You're dating someone and search for someone else?
Christine Ofc not. But it would be a good argument.
Maybe if you get enough good arguments you could have some impact on your situation.
So a pleasant side-effect,even if unexpected at first.
Hi!
Still dating your girlfriend?
Angelina what exactly is her opinion?
She wants me to keep wearing a belt.
saras I do feel her pain as her situation is similar to mine
Thank you.
Vanessa You're dating someone and search for someone else?
Last.
Vanessa Maybe if you get enough good arguments you could have some impact on your situation.
That's why I'm here and your advises are very useful.
Christine That's why I'm here and your advises are very useful.
I'm very happy to hear that. Often I find it hard to judge if advice is welcomed, and if I should continue with what I started, or if that would only lead to frustration.
You seemed to have lost hope that you could get out of your current situation; have our tips helped you see more hope again, and have gotten you more active? I read you are actively looking for a relation now; are you also more active in trying to improve your own financial situation?
In the end it is often best to go into a relationship from a stable situation: if you feel you need the relation to get you out of your current situation, you'll feel dependent on him, which isn't good to start a balanced relation (if that is what you are looking for), and could leave you feel trapped in the relation, if the only alternative would be to move back in with mother and belt.
So I would advise to first get your independence, and then a relationship,. But of course if you don't see a way to reach that independence now, you might fall back on starting a relationship and hope for the best.
carg So I would advise to first get your independence, and then a relationship,.
i would disagree. of course it can lead her back into dependency on a man, but it's all about ambition and motivation. she needs to have the motivation to fight her way out of her current life. i find it scary that her mother doesn't support this and a new partner could even have a positive effect and give her new motivation.
Yes, it is not easy to decide what would be best for Christine here, and you raise valid points. I have been thinking hard on the advice I gave, because of this.
In the end my fear of her exchanging one unhappy situation for another made me decide to advise first for independence, but I compromised by saying that if that would take too long, it might be better just to go for a relation anyway.
Every relation has a power balance, even though I don't like that phrase, because it suggests there is a struggle where both parties try to gain as much power as they can, and that is not always the case. But each partner in an equal relationship needs to find a balance between complaining about everything they don't like, and just accepting everything. When you get a little more experience in relationships, you (can) learn which things are not that important to you, and which things will lead to serious problems later if you don't address them now. A trivial example: for some people the color of the couch is not that important, and they quickly give in if their partner wants another color, and for others each time they would see that couch they feel a little frustration that the color is wrong.) When you go into a relationship with fear that if it doesn't work out, you'd have to fall back to the current unhappy situation, it is harder to stand up for yourself. And even if the partner is not intent on gaining the upper hand, it will be natural to just do it their own way, and fill that power gap.
Once the power balance in a relationship is established, it is hard to change it: the partner has to be willing to give up part of the power, and both parties need to work hard not to fall back into the established behaviour patterns.
So, my point is that going into a relationship that way has disadvantages, but that is not to say that it can't work out. If you are aware of the risk of giving in too easily, you can fight the impulse; if the partner is kind (s)he can actively ask for your opinion, if both are willing they can shift the power balance later, ...
i understood your concerns and arguments, i even share them a bit, but i had to disagree because i have had other experiences with my girlfriend. she helps me so much when i am feeling bad, she supports me when i am desperate again and she gives me the motivation to face the situation and the discussions with my father. @Christine could get the same support if she finds a partner who supports her to live independently again.
carg if you feel you need the relation to get you out of your current situation, you'll feel dependent on him, which isn't good to start a balanced relation
I agree.
It would not be a wise decision.
But in your case,your relationship was not to be more free,but because you fall in love.
If @Christine starts a relationship only to be free of her chastity belt,it could easily be very different.
Hi all
Apologies for the delay - here is my update.
Things have been more or less the same for me regarding chastity. I live at home still and with that comes certain 'underwear' as you know LOL.
I have a job now in a bar, not enough to move out just yet but am saving up. As I need to wear pants there, dad removes thighbands but back on once home again
I am still with my gf and she knows about my gear now. she thinks its wierd dad locks me but also kinda hot that i can only focus on her pleasure not mine (go figure)
She has met my dad and he likes her which is a good thing so things are well all things considered
Angelina did she at least address the fact that it makes you unhappy
She knows it.
Angelina does she motivate you to manage your life again yourself?
Ofc.
Vanessa Ok,I hope you find a new boyfriend soon,so!
Me too.
carg are you also more active in trying to improve your own financial situation?
This part is more important.
Angelina could get the same support if she finds a partner who supports her to live independently again
Less likely.
Vanessa If @Christine starts a relationship only to be free of her chastity belt,it could easily be very different.
And get it back after? I need a long term solution.
Vanessa If @Christine starts a relationship only to be free of her chastity belt,it could easily be very different.
it is not only about the belt, the belt would be a consequence of the "new life force" and a partner can motivate and support this. 
thanks for the update, glad you are doing well and still with your girlfriend glad you have a job and are saving money
can't you live with your girlfriend ?
Christine Ofc.
then she should also be interested in you staying happy, currently it seems to me that this is not the case enough.
Christine And get it back after? I need a long term solution.
i mean of course a long term relationship, you should not be with someone you do not love
saras Things have been more or less the same for me regarding chastity. I live at home still and with that comes certain 'underwear' as you know LOL.
Sorry for you!
saras I have a job now in a bar, not enough to move out just yet but am saving up.
When do you think you would have enough money to live on your own?
saras I am still with my gf and she knows about my gear now.
Good!
saras kinda hot that i can only focus on her pleasure not mine
Do you think she may ask you to continue wearing it?
saras She has met my dad
Technically,he had already met her during the holidays,right?
Christine This part is more important.
More than a new boyfriend?
Christine And get it back after? I need a long term solution.
Yes.
I don't think it would be a good solution.
Angelina can't you live with your girlfriend ?
It would be surprising,they don't date since a long time.
