Other people want me to wear a chastity belt

Damien

@Carlos Maybe you want to choose another profile pic. I find pictures of caged genitalia inappropriate here, it's not even an adult thread.

youdontknowme

I do not mind them, but usually that sort of prouly showing it off is done by people who are a lot more happy to wear the belt.

Angelina

youdontknowme but usually that sort of prouly showing it off is done by people who are a lot more happy to wear the belt.

yes, it seems a little inappropriate for the serious topic of this thread and from someone who doesn't always like to wear the belt

Carlos

Well time for another update.

I am still with my partner but I am still not free from the belt. Basically I am locked when I am either out or my partner is not at home. I did have a fairly in-depth conversation with my partner about why she likes me to be wearing the belt and it turned out that it was not just about anxiety of being cheated on there is other factors as well. For me to wear the belt when I was out or she was not at home I did insist on a few points. 1st that when when we are at home together the belt comes off no questions asked. 2nd to limit contact with my family and attempt to use them to pressure me in to doing something I am not comfortable with. 3rd was that she was to look in to changing her job so she would not be doing as many weekend and night shifts, If that was not possible we should look in to getting her a belt as well. The 3rd point was to be reviewed in 6 months time so see what the outcome of that point would be. To end I did say that if these points were not met I would consider the relationship over and require her to leave living with me. She agreed with me and our relationship has been pretty good from then.

My family have not been that bad in the last few months they have stopped giving me hassle about getting out of the belt. They did get me a new belt and gave it to my partner mid December but If I am honest I am not keen on it. Not that it is a bad belt it just feels different from what I am used to. I cant move in the same way and it is a struggle to get it comfortable. They did say to me that there is another one on its way but it might be 3 months or it could be a year before they get it. Apparently they ordered it but had no idea it would take so long. The only awkward time with the family was between Christmas and New years. My Mother and Auntie had a few drinks in them and they started talking about me getting married and having kids. I quickly shuffled that conversation along and then promptly left.

So still not 100% happy but it is improving. Lets see what happens in the next few months.

Milord

Carlos If you were so determined to ask her to leave if she don't accept, that's a huge step. I will push that, being equal, she should wear a belt exactly as you do. I see no reasons why it should not be this way. She probably doesn't like it, but neither you, so it's only fair
Now I can't understand your parent involvement at this point. They know you have premarital sex. You are autonomous. What's the point in deciding your belt?
Currently, you should wear it only if you want and in any case, it's a thing between you and your. You should not allow them control over you
State clearly that it's an abuse and you will not tolerate this.

To be mean, if they talk about marrying and having kids, you may just say that if they don't stop bothering you, they will never be able to see their nephews or grandchildren. After all, you don't want your children to be in chastity like you, right?

EDIT: i had an idea about your parents, maybe you want to check if they fall in this categoria
Narcissistic parents

Also, always remember that to be free is your right, not a priviledge

Angelina

Carlos

Thanks for the update, it's nice to read that you're feeling a little better 🙂

I'm still worried, maybe you should finally assert your views. Do you want to be with this woman if she doesn't respect your physical autonomy? I would expect my partner in a situation like this to be on my side and not your family's. I think you've endured and accepted a lot, that should be enough proof that you really love her and that she doesn't have to be afraid

Martin

Carlos They

Carlos They did get me a new belt and gave it to my partner mid December but If I am honest I am not keen on it. Not that it is a bad belt it just feels different from what I am used to.

Do you know what type (mark) of the belt is it? (The second one as well)

Carlos

Martin It is an access denied belt. The 2nd one is from the same people that made my original belt but it is a different model. Apparently they folk that make it are taking ages to produce their belt.

We have both had a pretty horrid time of is this week and have not been free from the belt at all in the last week. We both came down with covid so were both feeling pretty crappy i did not ask for the belt to come off at all. I was just mostly sleeping from the meds i was taking. My partner did ask me if i wanted out on Wednesday night for some relief but i had to be honest and say that i do not have enough energy to do anything.

It has been a few weeks in to the new year and my partner has started looking for alternative jobs but there does not appear to be many around that pay as much as her current role. So it is unlikely that she will be able to change her working hours. So in that aspect i think i am going to request that she wears a belt when she is out of the house as well but i am not sure how i am going to bring this up with her.

Milord

Carlos So in that aspect i think i am going to request that she wears a belt when she is out of the house as well but i am not sure how i am going to bring this up with her.

“Hi dear, you can choose between 3 possibilities
1) I get free
2) you get belted with the same conditions I have
3) we break up, you go away from my house and I get free and finally start to have a normal life”

Pretty easy. 😂

And keep your parents and away away from your genitals. It is none of their business, and you should enforce this in any possible way.

Angelina

Carlos So in that aspect i think i am going to request that she wears a belt when she is out of the house as well but i am not sure how i am going to bring this up with her.

You live in a relationship together and I would say very clearly, either the two of us or neither of us. If she wants you to wear a belt because she's afraid you'll cheat on her or something similar, then you can reply that, in theory, the same applies to her. Either she sees that her fears are unfounded or she has to live with the fact that you also require the same “security measures”.

youdontknowme

Milord Intellectually easy. Emotionally it can be a lot more difficult to deliver an ultimatum to your partner like that.

Carlos

Milord Right i am going to be bringing this up tonight and see what she says.

I think i would modify your 2nd point i think we can have / will need different conditions.

@Angelina that is a verry good point.

If all goes well i could be free of the belt which i highly doubt. 2 She starts wearing a belt as well which i think will happen or 3 i tell her to leave and i move on.

Milord

youdontknowme freedom never came easily. And is never granted. Should be taken. A very important step in becoming adult.

Milord

Carlos think i would modify your 2nd point i think we can have / will need different conditions.

Why? What is the rational behind different conditions?

Anyway, on purely personal opinion, you should get finally free, unless you have a fetish. Than, after enjoying freedom, you can decide if you, and no one else, want to be caged or not.

Edit:
@Carlos can you give me some context? Because it seems to me that you wear a belt only because your parents want it, and that’s hardly a good reason. Then, you never mentioned that it’s a rule of your house. Did your sister or other siblings wear it too? Your parents?
And what is the reason? Religious? Other?
Since in your message it appears that you are unhappy, why you don’t just free yourself? If your parents negate your right, you should consider them abusive and narcissistic.
On Reddit there is a very active group about narcissists parents. Maybe you should post there your story, you will receive very good feedback
If not, can you explain better your reasons?
I ask to give better advices, not to criticise you

I don’t know if there is someone here that thinks that forcing an adult and independent son in chastity leveraging on his desire to make his parent happy isn’t abusive. In case please can they explain their reasoning? Because I can’t see any.

Angelina

Carlos If all goes well i could be free of the belt which i highly doubt. 2 She starts wearing a belt as well which i think will happen or 3 i tell her to leave and i move on.

i think it is important that it remains fair, i think you have decided on an equal relationship? then both should have the same rights

Carlos

Milord

The original reason i had to wear a belt was because of my parents. They are little religious but i would not say overly religious they are very conservative and have very traditional views on life. I had a pregnancy scare when i was younger and that catalysed me being put in to chastity. Both my parents wore belts in the past my mother wore a belt right up to the age of 60 and i know my father wore a belt when he worked away from home. A few of my aunties wore belts as well as well but i do not think they do so anymore.

When i moved out of my parents house my partner was very keen on me to keep wearing the belt. The reason at the time she told me was she was afraid that i would cheat on her as she was cheated on in the past. I later found out it is very much more than a trust thing for her.

We have accepted that she will be unable to leave her job for quite some time so she has agreed that she needs to wear a belt with fairly similar conditions as myself. We have ordered a belt but we are not expecting delivery for a few months.

Milord

@Carlos

Maybe you find it interesting to read about Walt's situation

https://unwedchastity.org/d/1028-walt-page/

Milord

Hi Carlos,
Thanks for answering
i will give here my personal view

Carlos The original reason i had to wear a belt was because of my parents. They are little religious but i would not say overly religious they are very conservative and have very traditional views on life. I had a pregnancy scare when i was younger and that catalysed me being put in to chastity. Both my parents wore belts in the past my mother wore a belt right up to the age of 60 and i know my father wore a belt when he worked away from home. A few of my aunties wore belts as well as well but i do not think they do so anymore.

Fine, they decide for themselves, you own them nothing. Let's remove them from any decisions regarding your life. Btw, you live with a girl. If course you have already made premarital sex. At this point wanting to keep you caged is a narcissist behavior.

When I moved out of my parents p house my partner was very keen on me to keep wearing the belt. The reason at the time she told me was she was afraid that i would cheat on her as she was cheated on in the past. I later found out it is very much more than a trust thing for her.

She has been very lucky. 90% will have plainly refused and dropped her laughing at her

We have accepted that she will be unable to leave her job for quite some time so she has agreed that she needs to wear a belt with fairly similar conditions as myself. We have ordered a belt but we are not expecting delivery for a few months.

Fine, so the deal should be you will stay out of the belt until her belt arrives, right? Otherwise it is not fair at all

At this point Carlos, I've learned a lot of things and my vision changed. For me you should get free from anyone that wants you caged. If you don't you are, for me, not anymore a victim but an accomplice in your own imprisonment, but if it makes you happy, fine with me. If you aren't, you should get free. Not in the future, but now. You are independent economically. You should finally become emotionally independent too

Angelina

Carlos We have accepted that she will be unable to leave her job for quite some time so she has agreed that she needs to wear a belt with fairly similar conditions as myself. We have ordered a belt but we are not expecting delivery for a few months.

a good step, i hope she agrees to wear it on the same terms as she wants you to wear it

Carlos The only reason i continue to wear it is because of my partner and her various reasons. I have been with her for quite some time and i do not want to simply just leave her.

it is certainly very difficult to weigh up which is stronger, the need for individual freedom or the love for your partner. love also means trust and that you treat each other fairly, she should show you the same love as you show her by wearing a belt herself under the same conditions or forget the whole thing for good

Carlos

Milord Well i have distanced myself from my family and i am limiting their thoughts on my life. I have also warned my partner if she contacts them i will consider the relationship over.

At the start i was happy enough to keep wearing the belt and for her to be the keyholder it was a way for me to escape the family home. Once i was away i started to rebel from wearing the belt more. It just got to a point where i hated it and wanted rid of it.

The only reason i continue to wear it is because of my partner and her various reasons. I have been with her for quite some time and i do not want to simply just leave her. I am not over joyed at having to wear the belt when i am out of the house or my partner is out of the house. I can get out no questions asked when we are both home. That is an interesting point about not wearing the belt until hers arrives i am going to have to bring that point up.

Milord

Carlos can get out no questions asked when we are both home. That is an interesting point about not wearing the belt until hers arrives i am going to have to bring that point

@Carlos I hope you can see by yourself that it's not fair at all. People that don't respect us should have no place in our life. For her You have to pay for what others did: Others cheated, you have to pay. You should get out immediately, and stay this way until you have the same conditions. Otherwise you can trust me, when the belt arrive she will have a lot of excuses, like it's uncomfortable for not wearing it. She has to know that the only way for you to wear is that she wears too.
EDIT: my guess: She will not wear it. I bet on it. She bought to take time, but she will not use it. She's betting on the fact that you are weak willed and will accept that she doesn't wear while continuing to keep you caged.

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