We've only ever come out to other people in the kink community in a nearby city, but we haven't been active there in years.

We live near a small town in the country where the only way to keep a secret is to tell nobody. But having a secret is half the fun.

The closest I come to admitting that I even think risque thoughts is that a couple times a year I might tell a dirty joke to some of the young adults at church or in town. I think this may be why they come to me for advice so often. It might make me seem less judgemental.

Sasha One positive side effect of me wearing it is I’ve actually made friends by being so open about it.
My behavior obviously made a lot of people not like me much, but since I’ve obviously changed I’ve been able to make amends with many of them. Those were the many “it’s about time” comments I got

People's reactions show that you have really changed for the better. It's a great proof that if you really want to, you can change a lot in yourself. Congratulations and keep up the good work.

    Damien Keyholding currency is trust, and that's not as boring as it may sound.

    I say trust is the base for every relationship. But I agree key holding is is a challenge and that makes it very interesting. Especially because of the intensive conversations.

      Damien I love that you let your friends in on your chastity belt. Sometimes the idea finds fertile ground. And why would they have a problem with that pretty piece of shiny metal on you as long as you yourself don't?

      I've no problem sharing that I wear a belt, no problem at all, I'm proud of it. Explaining that I wear it to prevent chronic masturbation however... Not such an easy thing!! Lol. 😅 🤣 😅

        Damien What is your experience "coming out" to friends?

        in my case, only my best friend knows (i've known her for over 10 years) and it was more of a coincidence because i'm a bit careless with her. she saw it and sensed it, so i told her the whole story. she didn't want to believe it at first, then was curious and finally she promised that i can always talk to her about it and she will support me and that's exactly what she is doing 🙂

          Was about to be "outed" to friends by a wand metal detector anyway so told them before the door. They were cool. I wasn't happy that it wasn't my free choice to come out, however I found that being open about my chastity belt makes me a more relaxed and more authentic version of myself, so it's all good. From that point on I decided not to sweat it. If people know, they know. If it's a problem, it's a problem for them.

          Damien And why would they have a problem with that pretty piece of shiny metal on you as long as you yourself don't?

          I think people find the idea of chastity belts challenging. They like sex a lot and can't conceive of the idea that their pleasures could be entirely blocked, ...or even controlled by another.

          Sometimes the idea finds fertile ground.

          A lot of times this seems to happen with people with very high sex drives. Their sex drive gets them into dangerous/undesirable situations and they take steps to prevent it, or else it becomes an expression of extreme kink.

          Either way, it seems harsh luck for people with high sex drives to end up in belts! But, it's only sex isn't it? Not like it's a big deal... Lol.

              Jonas A lot of times this seems to happen with people with very high sex drives.

              I know two ladies where this does not seem to be the case. One has been wearing her FancySteel (metal hip belt, FS3 dome shield) with equanimity and nonchalance for weeks, hardly mentioning it in our conversations. I admit I recently added the little tingling steel ball on the inner part of her shield for a day just to see what it takes to get her more emotional about belt wearing 🙂

                Telling that one wears a chastity belt is quite hard, especially for ones using it for non fetish purposes.
                Majority of people don't know that chastity belt is real.
                Most of ones who know that chastity belt is real thinks it's for fetish use
                I wish more non fetish users could be free to be open about their chastity belt use without being suspected as fetishists.

                  Saintprudence that’s not so much “coming out” as “being shown off.”

                  It would be more the equivalnt of "being outed"

                    Christine idk if it counts. Mom showed my belt to relatives. Ofc locked on me.

                    No way! Under what circumstances? Surely not the whole belt, just waistband?

                        Damien How did you feel?

                        I can't say, but it was a strong enough feeling to get her to become her mother's keyholder.

                            Rina without being suspected as fetishists.

                            Those evil kinksters and fetishists with their weird ideas about educated consent among adults ;-)

                            The concept of female chastity or virginity has been called a fetish in itself by some smart people here in the forum.

                                Damien The concept of female chastity or virginity has been called a fetish in itself by some smart people here in the forum.

                                I would argue that virginity obsession has led to more sexual objectification than kink ever will.

                                    youdontknowme I would argue that virginity obsession has led to more sexual objectification than kink ever will.

                                    I don't agree. One could say Muslim countries are virginity obsessed but I don't think there is more sexual objectification there than, say, in the US. Even in college running here we wear bottoms that barely cover our bottoms and don't fully cover them during a race. Female bodies here sell just about everything. In Iran they substitute pictures of the supreme leader.