just for fun and interest, should i wear a belt after after the wedding?
youdontknowme I just always thought of you as the more dominant of the couple, but ever since you tried the belt you seem to be settling into a more submissive role.
yes, there seems to be a shift in the topic of sexuality. it's good for me to give up responsibility in one area and it's certainly beneficial for my wife too. you know, we want to have an equal marriage, but by nature i'm a bit more dominant in some areas, so this can be a good balance
thanks for your ideas, but i fundamentally reject technical/mechanical key holders. for me, it's precisely the attraction of my wife having the keys that can make me wear the belt again in the first place 
Sara it is awesome that you are taking something that was unpleasant and turning it into something that is fun.
maybe that's an important point, i wear the belt for my wife and myself to get closure on what my father did, even though it might sound a bit crazy, but i have the hope to process the old experiences by going new ways with the belt
Joh Set rules and let your wife decide how things should be done within the framework of the rules.
that's exactly what we want, i've been talking to my wife about it for the last few days and we've come to the conclusion that the rules should only be rough guidelines if possible and that only absolute ‘red flags’ need to be adhered to. I do something completely or not at all and if I want to give control over my sexuality to my wife, she must have every opportunity to react flexibly (more on this in the update)
Michael I just think you do not have to plan everything right now.
That's true, I really have to break myself of that habit. I'm used to planning everything down to the last detail, that's how I knew it back then with the rules with my father, but it's different here. I'm doing it voluntarily and she should have control because I want it that way. The 6-month "probationary period" will remain, however, because it can of course be the case that expectations and reality don't match up.
Update:
thanks for all your ideas
My wife and I have discussed a lot in the last few days and we have come to preliminary results that I would like to share with you. These are just rough outlines, it is not New Year yet and until then we will try to refine things or things may change.
I plan to wear the belt and bra all the time, with exceptions only for special situations (air travel, beach, doctor's visits, etc.). Camryn decides whether such a situation exists and whether it is necessary not to wear the belt and bra.
my wife may decide whether I should wear thighbands in certain situations, but she may not use them as a standard part of my equipment, but only in certain situations and only for limited periods of time.
The first 6 months are a "trial period" and have a safe word. During this period, either of us can end the whole thing without giving a reason. If the safe word is mentioned, it's over immediately.
the last point is probably the most difficult for me, but we decided to do it because we think that giving up control means actually doing it. We talked a lot about how many breaks or, better said, how many orgasms I should have. There were various time periods available for a minimum number. In the end we decided to use the absolute minimum because it allows the most flexibility for my wife. I should have an orgasm at least once a month, that is what I can insist on. But Camryn can give me orgasms (as she wants), as many as she wants. I expect the number of orgasms I have to reduce significantly, currently we have sex about 3-4 times a week, but that is part of the whole thing.
As described, this is just a first draft of how the whole thing could look, it is not final yet and I am happy to accept questions and ideas
Angelina Dear Angelina, I'm delighted your my-steel will hold your body again, instead of flower pots on the wall. I am a little shocked at your strict bra regime though! is that necessary to keep you from climaxing, or is it one more instance where you go all the way because that is the Angelina way?
Angelina It is obvious that both of you have put a lot of thought into this and that you are committed to having it be a growth and learning experience. You are both lucky to have such a good partner. I suspect that even if the number of orgasms for you does not change (although I suspect it will) you will have a constant awareness that the number and timing is not under your control. I expect that how that awareness feels will be different when the control lies with your wife rather than with your father, who had a different agenda of his own.
I commend you on being strict with yourself and choosing the bra full time. That is dedication to wearing a belt and having the concept be most effective.
Angelina This sounds like a good base to start with.
Don't forget to have on a regular base a talk about your feelings and experience since the last talk. So you can adjust it on time if necessary. As I wrote before I don't think it is good to discuss it outside of the talk.
Another point you may consider. Is your orgasm what makes you happy or the intimacy and excitement you get from Camryn?
@Joh makes a very good point. Orgasms are wonderful but the quest for orgasms is sometimes a distraction from forming and maintaining good intimate relationships. I don't think this applies to @Angelina and Camryn. But I find, for myself, that have very controlled, limited access to penetrative sex lets me view female friends in a better light and helps me focus more on the intimacy, fun, excitement, and companionship.
Tjc Since starting to wear my belt (and later bra and bands) I’ve found that the thrill is in the hunt. It’s thrilling to pursue that orgasm each month, it’s actually more satisfying to me than the actual orgasm is, which feels great obviously but it’s more the prize at the end of a successful hunt.
Kind of like stalking the pray for weeks and finally getting there. I would be interested to hear @Angelina observation on that and if that makes her feel more or less inclined to restrict her own orgasms further. Or if that feeling develops over time
Sasha I agree. The looking forward to and anticipation is an ongoing excitement. The actual release of the orgasm for most men means the arousal is over for awhile, almost to the point of being a cliché. Having the ongoing arousal from the anticipation, I find, is great. Since my accountability partner and I added my progress in some courses I am taking to the criteria for "me time", it makes doing the assignments more interesting. I don't find the denial distracting as some people have suggested. It is just always a reminder of what is coming if I stick with the program.
I have not thought of it as a hunt, but that is a great mental image. I have this picture of you as a great jungle cat out stalking an orgasm.
It will be interesting to see how @Angelina looks at her situation over the six month trial and how that affects their plans to move forward, if they decide to. She is a good writer and good at sharing how she feels so it is something to look forward to.
no, i don't get orgasms by rubbing my breasts, but i can stimulate myself a lot. the question should be the other way round. i give my sexual control to my wife and that includes my breasts
Sasha Curious if you’ve discussed how the other will feel if the safe word is used.
we have discussed that there will be no discussions in the first 6 months. if someone uses the safeword, the belt will be opened and the ‘game’ is over. of course we would analyse later what didn't work
Tjc I suspect that even if the number of orgasms for you does not change (although I suspect it will) you will have a constant awareness that the number and timing is not under your control.
that's exactly the point, i have inserted a minimum certainty that i have to get one orgasm a month, but i don't know when i'll get it. i also don't know if i'll get one or ten orgasms a month, that's all for my wife to decide and i'll only find out during sex
Joh Don't forget to have on a regular base a talk about your feelings
we are considering setting up a fixed day each week on which we talk openly to avoid discussions on the other days
Joh Is your orgasm what makes you happy or the intimacy and excitement you get from Camryn?
definitely the latter, otherwise I couldn't get involved in being locked up again 
you have to consider that we had a relationship for several years in which i had no orgasms and the relationship was still happy, for me an orgasm is only a small part of the marriage, a ‘climax’ of intimacy 
. of course i am also happy with few orgasms when i realise that my wife takes care of me and loves me 100%
Tjc She is a good writer and good at sharing how she feels so it is something to look forward to.
due to my poor knowledge of english i am not a good writer, but i will try to describe as precisely as possible what is happening and how i feel about it 
Angelina
Seems you already have an exciting plan in place. Hopefully it will work for both of you.
If you have an average of one orgasms a month and you did have ten in a month, does that mean that the next nine months you won't have any?
Do your thighbands also have a block piece for making them even more restrictive when needed?
Spork One idea: have you thought about getting other accessories for your belt? For example, plugs that can be locked in for a while?
no, because in my view it contradicts the purpose of a chastity belt. a chastity belt is supposed to prevent sexual activity, not promote it
Padre If you have an average of one orgasms a month and you did have ten in a month, does that mean that the next nine months you won't have any?
no, once a month is the minimum, every month, everything else is a decision of my wife. in the worst case i get an orgasm on the first day of a month and then another one on the last day of the next month, but it can also be that i get 10 orgasms in one month, but then i still get at least one the next month
Padre Do your thighbands also have a block piece for making them even more restrictive when needed?
i don't own anything like that and it's not necessary. i will wear a chain in the triangular version as i have done before
Sasha using only a padlock between them is more restrictive than you’d ever need for a punishment
a chain is enough and i think my wife will think several times whether the bands are really used, she knows how hard it is for me. actually I wanted to exclude the bands, but I think if I give her the right to control my sexuality she must also have that option
- Edited
Angelina no, because in my view it contradicts the purpose of a chastity belt. a chastity belt is supposed to prevent sexual activity, not promote it
I might argue (and I believe you earlier wrote) that the purpose of your belt is to "give sexual control to [your] wife". That control might mean taking away your ability to reach one type of sexual pleasure (until she chooses to give that to you). However it could also mean giving up control not to be constantly reminded of that type of pleasure. "Accessories", which you are powerless to remove, could heighten the sense of control you have given to Camryn and the anticipation of greater pleasures that only she has the power to provide?
Angelina i don't own anything like that and it's not necessary. i will wear a chain in the triangular version as i have done before
Does the triangular chain force you to close your legs if you sit down?
Regarding the block piece. I think it makes only sense if you have the feeling you need more restriction at a specific situation. But I doubted this will ever happen in your relation. If you do, you can make one yourself from a screw, washers, a nut and a lock.
Sasha Im very interested to see how this experience goes for you, its a topic that has come up between my girlfriend and I a few times, will be very helpful seeing someones else's experience in a similar dynamic.
Do you have a similar agreement with your girlfriend?