WriterAlexis Page

youdontknowme

Sabina In my opinion, what you write is evidence of obvious coercion on the part of your parents, if you are threatened with being denied such basic things if you give up the belt.

I mean, we know nothing about how old she is, but I would say if she is old enough to wear a belt, things like being able to own a phone or visit the library seem like fairly unreasonable restrictions to enforce on a daughter who does not comply with fairly tall parental demands.

Sabina

youdontknowme Judging by the highly intellectual writing style, she is a mature person, at least at the high school level, although I think she is older.

youdontknowme

Sabina If she were below high school level and her parents were making her wear a chastity belt, that should ring several alarm bells and get a whole lot of authorities involved.

Ines

George You mean like @WriterAlexis has the grievance that she is belted without a reason, as punishment for what her stepsister did?

Do not forget that she wears her belt as the result of a deal.

WriterAlexis By that logic, shouldn't dad be caged too? Seems turnabout is fair play.

No chastity belt for men in my family. It is a girls thing.

Women have to act and behave as women, and men as men.

Ines

George You mean like @WriterAlexis has the grievance that she is belted without a reason, as punishment for what her stepsister did?

Well, I think it is not a punishment, but a, -wrong-, way to solve some problems. Since her sister had problems with behaviors very improper for girls, it is very reasonable that they think in a chastity belt as a solution.
Since her mother has to wear the belt too, and nobody is forced to wear it, I think that there is not room for complaints.

pestulens

Ines Since her mother has to wear the belt too, and nobody is forced to wear it, I think that there is not room for complaints

Based on her description, it sounds like even if she is not technically forced, she is at least coerced.

Laura

Ines Since her mother has to wear the belt too

Does she have to?
She only has belts that are not required to be worn. At least how I understand this

WriterAlexis She does have belts, but does not use one all of the time.

Ines

Laura Does she have to?

I understand that her mother has to wear the belt even her rules are a bit different of her daughters rules.

Angelina why does your sister get breaks from the belt when you don't, even though she has more reason to wear one than you do?

It is a great question for @WriterAlexis

WriterAlexis

Laura

All I know is that she was wearing before my sister and I and that she is not wearing much of the time. I don't know what rules my mom and dad have, and I am not about to ask.

WriterAlexis

Sabina

If I may ask, does your OCD have anything to do with sexuality?

Yes. I think it was entirely ancillary to the decision for me to be in chastity because I doubt my parents know the extent, but unmedicated and left to my own devices, it would become highly compulsive during high stress times. I can remember the weeks before some of my academic tests or some of the swimming/horseback competitions I was doing, my membranes would be raw and inflamed in the morning. I did not tell the psychiatrists about what I was doing, because masturbation (especially female) has so much shame attached to it from religious indoctrination, despite being a normal, healthy part of childhood sexual development. Of course, even then it must be engaged in with appropriate levels of privacy and moderation.

Sabina

WriterAlexis I can remember the weeks before some of my academic tests or some of the swimming/horseback competitions I was doing, my membranes would be raw and inflamed in the morning

I suspected so. I just thought it was more likely to push your parents (rather than you) to decide about chastity belt.

WriterAlexis Can I masturbate? I do not have much opportunity to do so at the moment.

How do your parents justify prohibiting masturbation for you? Religion or (also) some other reasons?

Sin

WriterAlexis I have been manifesting anxiety and OCD for as long as I have been communicative.

WriterAlexis unmedicated and left to my own devices, it would become highly compulsive during high stress times. I can remember the weeks before some of my academic tests or some of the swimming/horseback competitions I was doing, my membranes would be raw and inflamed in the morning.

This hits home for me and brings up all sorts of issues I'm still trying to work through as a 30-something adult. As a teenager I was (very inappropriately) misdiagnosed for what was essentially a physical condition, and heavily medicated with antidepressants that I didn't need, and certainly didn't want. I'm mid 30s now and only just coming to terms with my own libido as a result.

Not to say I disagree with your mental health diagnosis... just that antipsychs are a slippery slope and if you ever want to come off them, you might be in for a hell of a ride. HINT: Don't go cold turkey like I did.

WriterAlexis

Angelina

Summary post.

Your sister and you both wear a chastity belt?

Me and older step-sister do. Younger half-sister is still elementary age.

You have to wear it because your sister had problems and now you're being collectively punished, right?

Basically. I wouldn't necessarily use the word "punish" here, but a decision was made and applied to both of us to supposedly increase fairness and avoid strife.

can you masturbate?

At the risk of pendantry knowing English is not your primary language (and an incredible job you have done in mastering it! @angelina) I will split this into two answers.

May I masturbate? The weird, cultish church some dude in New York made up about a dead angel, some gold plates buried in the ground, Jesus living in America, and an ancient tribe of Israelites crossing the Atlantic ocean 2,000 years before Columbus, no. It is sinful. And the kool-aid sipping parental units buy into that.

Can I masturbate? I do not have much opportunity to do so at the moment. Additionally, because of medication that is vitally important to me, and I am so exceedingly grateful for the economic position my family is in to afford it (compared to yours, the heathcare in this country is even more backward than our religious notions) it is exceedingly difficult for me to achieve orgasm under ecen ideal circumstances.

Why does your sister get breaks from the belt and you don't?

She is older and more independent than me.
She was, is, and forever shall be the Golden Child.
I have also made some mistakes of my own since then. Despite whatever level of maturity I may or may not have, I now recognize that I am a human who still needs to grow if I am to be the moral, ethical being that I ultimately wish to be. And the scariest thing about that does not have anything to do with parental oversight, chastity belts, or punishments. It is that I may never actually reach that state and I remain a deeply flawed, broken creature eeking out its meager existence until it ahuffles off this mortal coil. I want to be the person I should be, I just don't know if I can.

George

WriterAlexis May I masturbate? The weird, cultish church some dude in New York made up about a dead angel, some gold plates buried in the ground, Jesus living in America, and an ancient tribe of Israelites crossing the Atlantic ocean 2,000 years before Columbus, no. It is sinful. And the kool-aid sipping parental units buy into that.

Ah, I didn't know that the Mormons smoke such good pot. Must be good stuff.

WriterAlexis Additionally, because of medication that is vitally important to me

A lottery win, physical chastity and chemical chastity. Poor girl.

WriterAlexis I am so exceedingly grateful for the economic position my family is in to afford it

You mentioned you are taking Sertralin, I checked, that's not exactly an earth shattering medication, the cheapest version in Austria has a healthsystem price of €8,25 for 30x100mg, so the private price (should be in the €12-13 range). So curious what are you paying in the US that you point out the economic position of your family?

youdontknowme

George Ah, I didn't know that the Mormons smoke such good pot. Must be good stuff.

The Book of Mormon is about the weirder pirces of scripture that fall under the umbrella of greater Christianity. Not as weird as some of the more fringe cults, but pretty weird for such a large church.

WriterAlexis I have also made some mistakes of my own since then. Despite whatever level of maturity I may or may not have, I now recognize that I am a human who still needs to grow if I am to be the moral, ethical being that I ultimately wish to be. And the scariest thing about that does not have anything to do with parental oversight, chastity belts, or punishments. It is that I may never actually reach that state and I remain a deeply flawed, broken creature eeking out its meager existence until it ahuffles off this mortal coil. I want to be the person I should be, I just don't know if I can.

Being the person we want to be is a struggle for everyone, not just the ones of us that consider themselves broken in some way. Fallibility is a trait that is inherently human, and whether or not you subscribe to the religious doctrine that we are all sinners who need to find forgiveness and make the most out of it, it is a matter of fact that when you hold yourself to a high standard, there will always be moments when you fall short. That is not a failure, that is just testament to the standard you aspire to. Never think you are not good enough - if you fall short of your expectations, that just means you still have room to become better in the future.

And unless you get an unplanned pregnancy, an STI or you get implicated in a crime for it, a minor sexual misstep is not going to ruin your life either.

George

Sabina How do your parents justify prohibiting masturbation for you? Religion or (also) some other reasons?

You just have to read:

WriterAlexis May I masturbate? The weird, cultish church some dude in New York made up about a dead angel, some gold plates buried in the ground, Jesus living in America, and an ancient tribe of Israelites crossing the Atlantic ocean 2,000 years before Columbus, no. It is sinful. And the kool-aid sipping parental units buy into that.

WriterAlexis

George

So curious what are you paying in the US that you point out the economic position of your family?

About the same, but only because they are paying my insurance premium first. Without that, it would probably be over $100/month. It kind of reminds me of this video. (SFW)
https://youtu.be/Kll-yYQwmuM

George

WriterAlexis Well, here it would be around €12-13 for uninsured (or "privately insured"), and the health care system (we do have basically 3 different "health social insurances, normal workers, self-employed/farmers and government employees, so it's almost single payer) €8-9 are paid by the healt-insurance and actually the co-pay for the insured is €6.85 (if you earn little or pay many prescriptions you don't pay that), so in this case the benefit of being insured is actually paying more or less only the co-pay, because the health system price is lower than the regular one.

But you are suggesting that regular price is something like $100 which is ridiculous for a medicine that costs €12 or so in Europe. Well, I'm sure the pharmaceutical industry and their shareholders appreciate the US system more.

youdontknowme

George That is a common criticism of the US healthcare system. People have gone broke on something as basic as insulin.

WriterAlexis

youdontknowme

Beyond going broke, young people have died from rationing insulin they couldn't afford.

George

which is ridiculous

Correct.

Sabina

George Yes, I read it, but my question is a bit poorly worded in English - I meant whether there were any other reasons apart from religion itself. When translating into English, Google Translator often loses the meaning of certain syntactic structures of the Polish language that modify the meaning of the statement.

Joh

Sabina Did you try deepl.com? I find the translation is better.

George

Sabina DeepL. It's not perfect, but significantly better than Google, Bing …

Google Translate is IMHO useless as an "output" translator. It's okay if you want to try to understand some piece of foreign text, because the broken text in an language you know you can usually decode, but if you use it to generate output in a language you do not know well, you are in a bad position to fix all its subtle or not so subtle errors.

For complicated concepts that might not have an 1:1 translation I also proposed to include the original word in brackets, so the reader can google it, if the sentence makes no or little sense to them. (But that does not apply here, when Google Translate mangles the meaning of the sentence as such.)

George

Sabina Sorry, English is my second language, that I in a way use on some days more than my mother language. Combined with the fact you are a law student I tend to forget that you might need to use a Google Translator to formulate your posts here.

(The Austrian school system is a bit like the old Ford joke, it was liberalized actually after my cohort, theoretically you can have chose different foreign languages, and thus have different 1st foreign languages. In practice I'm not sure if there any schools in Austria where the 1st foreign language is not English, I had 9 years English in school, my kids had 12 years + regular subjects being taught in English.)

So combine this conditioning, high school graduate (maturzystka) so obviously you are fluent in English. My daughter had no problems with the North American relations when they visited either. Law student, so obviously part of the educational elite. And Google Translate has mistranslated your intentions, but it sadly has produced basically a valid sentence, so there were no hints there either. Logical conclusions, you overlooked the post of Alexis.

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