Jenna 2.0

OK, thank you for your understanding. Let me try and answer some questions and get back to some of the others later. @Laura there is no need to restore anything but thank you for the offer. Anything I write from this point forward will be to correct the record and hopefully answer any questions that were raised before.

My real background is very similar to what I wrote initially. I grew up in a repressive religious community in the western US. I would prefer not to get into specifics. Around the age of 16 or so I was made to wear a chastity belt at the insistence of my mother. That decision wasn't to be questioned, period. It was awkward and uncomfortable, and it was my job to figure out how to live with it.

My mother was the unquestioned leader of the family. My father had two daughters from his first marriage, Susan and Kate, that came with him when he married my mother. His first wife, Susan and Kate's mother, passed away from cancer. They were about 2 and 4 years old when I was born. They were always nasty to me, probably because they hated my mother and took their anger towards her out on me. Part, and it is a big part, of my ire towards them is that they did not have to wear belts, my father shielded them from that. I had no such luck. They ridiculed me when they knew I had to wear the belt, and they didn't.

I knew at a young age that I was attracted to other girls, which was a huge taboo in my community, and the fate of an arranged marriage to one of the creepy old men there meant that I had to leave at all costs. No way could I live my life like that. When I finally got the courage to escape, I took off and never looked back. I moved to Southern California, met a wonderful older man who helped get me started working in his business. There was no sexual relationship of any kind, he was just a very kind man who saw a girl in need of help and over the years I made a good deal of money working for him. Eventually his children took over his business and I left on good terms with all of them. I had saved more than enough money that I did not need do anything.

I got bored after a few years and eventually decided to open a bar/restaurant in Southern California. At that time, I hired a girl that worked as both a waitress and bartender, she was very popular with the customers because of her bubbly personality and good looks. I try not to get involved with the personal lives of my employees because I think it is just bad business. In her case though it was difficult not to as she was always talking about her chaotic lifestyle of excessive drinking, marijuana smoking and other activities which always seemed to involve her sleeping with mostly men, but the occasional woman.

One night she broke down and told me that she had to figure out a way to get "off of the treadmill" and that she couldn't go on like this. She said that she was controlled by her addictions and her constant need to fulfill the sexual desires of others, especially men. She hated herself for it.

Not knowing what else to do, I asked if she wanted to move in with me where I could help her get control of her life. Lilly is her name. She herself came from a broken family and really had no one else to turn to and I felt compelled to help. She accepted my offer to move into my house. I fully accept that there is lots of grey area in here and some people would feel that my motivations in so are questionable.

Nevertheless, she moved in discreetly, as neither of us wanted anyone else to know she was living with me. We did not share a bedroom, and our relationship was non sexual. She appreciated the home life that I provided but did still go out regularly and did engage in many of the same risky behaviors, which she always regretted the next morning. I broached the idea of her wearing a chastity belt, as I did, to prevent these sexual encounters and curb her lifestyle. It was around this time that I joined the forum looking for ways to help convince her that this was path worth taking. Eventually I reached the point that if she wanted to continue to live with me, she had to wear the belt. I had reached my limit.

The story of Susan largely mirrors what happened between Lilly and I. There is much more that I can get into later on. But this is kind of an overview. The forum was really beneficial in that many of the people here helped me, and helped Lilly, get control over her life while helping me come to terms with a dark chapter in my past.

Angelina You are the person here I must identify with because of our similar backgrounds and you are the one I felt most guilty betraying because you always answered honestly and were never judgmental.

Laura Give me an example and I will restore them from the backup to let you answer.

No reason to Laura. But thank you for offer. I have made my peace, and hopefully others will agree. Going forward I will be happy to answer new questions and answer for past transgressions.

Laura Just curious, how old are you?

Let's just say I am comfortably past 40

Laura Welcome back.

Thank you good to be back.

Zplazma Fair question. I think I answer that below, but if you have other questions please feel free to ask.

Laura After I left my old life I did write some stories soon thereafter. Call it some kind of catharsis, I really can't explain it very well. It felt good writing nasty stories about girls that had bad things done to them. I always imagined it was my step-sisters in those stories. It was always fiction and it was something I enjoyed doing even though I no longer wore a belt myself.

Obviously I had experience with wearing a belt, but as I look back not all of it was bad. Being forced into wearing one was not fun and I was initially angry about it, mostly with my mother of course. However the belt did prevent unwanted sexual aggression by the creepy older men that I was regularly exposed to. It took me a long time to realize that maybe my mother did that to protect me, not to punish me, but I was too young to know the difference and she wasn't interested in offering explanations. To be honest I think that is something a lot of people on this forum don't understand. Too many people think of them as fetish accessories, and I can see that, but there are legitimate uses for them also.

I wish I would have come back sooner to offer my thoughts on the whole @PigtailSam episode. I would and could have been an advocate for her as she seemed to be alone in facing some harsh attacks.

As far as circling back to belt usage, the whole thing with Lilly and her inability can control her own sexual appetites, among other things, made me think a belt may be right for her. The whole Susan story was a messed up attempt on my part to inject my past into a real world situation. She was someone I wanted to help, had no real family structure to fall back on and needed help and guidance to get her life back under control. The belt, which of course I had experience with, I thought would be a good way to provide structure and sanity to a life that was out of control. It is admittedly an extreme step, but luckily that has worked out.

When I came across this site in doing research for a new belt for her I knew I had to join because no where else can you find so many people with so much to talk about on let's face it a taboo topic.

James Thank you James, good to talk with you again. Thank you for your understanding.

Renita any markings on the belt were filed off before I wore it. I think that was to prevent me, and any of the other girls that wore them, from trying to contact the manufacturer for a key. It was silly really, we were not allowed any outside contact that was not monitored and this predated cell phones and the internet. If I had to guess though, in looking at images on the internet long after I ran away, it may have been from a company called Tollyboy.

pestulens Why the deception? I can understand not wanting to be open about parts of it, but why did you feel the need to post an invented story about your fictional nices instead of the actual situation with Lilly, which would have fit right in hear?

That is a good question, and I maybe the best way to answer it is this way. I still harbored major anger at my step sisters and there was no way to incorporate both of them into a real story involving just Lilly. Also when I first reached out to the forum I wanted to ensure that there was not a sexual/fetish angle to the advice I was soliciting. I didn't want people to get the wrong idea and I thought it better ask for help for a parent/relative angle rather than from a bar owner looking to put a belt on one of her employees.

I took a lot of harsh criticism in the beginning, and 100% of it was totally deserved. But as I said before and I will say again, there are some really good, knowledgeable people who's hearts are in the right place in this forum. And yes I am talking to you @Angelina first a foremost. But there are others too, some who sadly I don't think are here anymore, but we very gracious towards me

The process that I described with "Susan" roughly mirrored what I went through with Lilly. Obviously i made up things like the senior prom and other details, but the crux of the situation with Lilly took kind of the same path. I will go through it again and answer questions, I owe it to the people I misled to tell the truth now.