Purpose of preventing masturbation?

Also I apologise if I come across as too self-righteous... I don't mean to get on my high horse and I don't want to tell anyone how to live their life, I just tend to get fired up over such things because I have been directly affected by it.

I'm new to the forum and I'm still trying to figure out what's real and what's not. I like that we can have interesting discussions that transcend cultures, political viewpoints etc (however hard that might be to take sometimes).

I'm still learning a lot when it comes to my own chastity experience, and I will never be as "hardcore" as some of the people on here. I'm not advocating for all of you to cut your belts off and masturbate furiously (although I would love to see that!).

I guess if I can contribute anything, it's that I would like potential abusers to read my story and recognise that if you inflict your own hangups onto your loved ones, you risk doing damage in ways you have never even considered.

And if you're a guy fantasising about such things, it's pretty obvious to those of us with an actual vagina. By all means fantasise, but be aware that by writing your fictional accounts on a forum like this there is a risk that uneducated people will see it as some kind of instruction manual for what is "possible" (I use that term loosely). Be better.

And now I shall get off my high horse.

Sin your writing is great and balanced don't apologise

Wrong team though Eagles all the way - but I live in another state

Jen lol well the Eagles players are okay (if you want to score drugs on a night out). ;-p

Are you in Melbs?

Sin no one of the rugby states but I won't say which.

Jen Understandable... I'd be embarrassed about that too!
:-P

Foxies You are so young but have a real ability to think and express yourself – particularly amazing since I know English is not your first language.

(& @Angelina )

Yeah I agree too but also I just can't imagine what it is like where you live. And how you cope and how your life works I guess despite it all. I used to think like isolated country town if Germany has that- but now I think rich. Does your father have a lot of money does that help shield him.

Foxies Sorry if my lecture is boring – smiles.

no it wasn't boring, because...

Foxies As you point out, it is complicated

....and you have written this complicated in a very beautiful text, i am absolutely thrilled how detailed you have described it unfortunately, i can't express myself like you, at least not in english, and due to time constraints, i would only like to comment on one point. ....

Foxies In a sense, any scientific theory can only be disproved, never ultimately confirmed.

... that was the crux of the matter, if someone says that science has proven something, it can't really be proven? so it's just the current state of affairs until it's disproven right?

Sin Regarding psychological issues... I was exposed to the same societal expectations as everyone else. I was branded "dirty", "filthy", "unladylike" and that all-time favourite "a slut", (and that's just from my mum). The science was far from perfect by the way... I was incorrectly diagnosed as hypersexual despite being a virgin (and still a child), I took anti psychotics / SSRIs to "fix my uncontrollable urges". As recently as the 1960s, women like me were institutionalised for being "hysterical".

i certainly don't want you to think that's what i'm saying. i don't mind anyone masturbating as much as they want. i also think it's wrong to judge anyone for that, i'm with you all the way on that. i was just concerned with your choice of words no more no less.

PS: i am surprised that such long answers came up, i thought it could be answered in 2 to 3 sentences.

Sin I guess if I can contribute anything, it's that I would like potential abusers to read my story and recognise that if you inflict your own hangups onto your loved ones, you risk doing damage in ways you have never even considered.

that's understandable, almost everyone here has a goal and almost everyone here wants to help, the paths are different but the goals are the same. i'm here to help girls who the decision has already been made, so they learn to deal with it as best they can

Angelina i'm here to help girls who the decision has already been made, so they learn to deal with it as best they can

This is such a good point. Assuming they are not trolls, there are some stories here where a girl has limited or no choice. While the stories are tragic (and make me angry that others do this to them) unless you walk in their shoes it and understand the issues and choices they are presented with, it could well be counterproductive to criticise their situation or handling of their choices.

The best and most human thing we can do is to offer useful advice, based on our own experience in a respectful and understanding manner that would make their circumstances easier, more comfortable and hopefully make them happier with their lot in life. The last thing we should ever do is increase their burden. Perhaps we should remember the meaning of an oath I took so many, many, years ago. "Do no harm!"

And Angelina, I see that is what you continue to do on an almost daily basis. I wish I could claim to be as thoughtful.

Angelina

However,if most studies tell it's not bad,while a few others tell it is,as long as all studies were made by skilled scientists,the ones telling it is not bad are probably right.

Joh

Me too.

Foxies Sorry if my lecture is boring – smiles.

Not at all,very interesting!

Sin be aware that by writing your fictional accounts on a forum like this there is a risk that uneducated people will see it as some kind of instruction manual

One of the reasons we try to make trolls leave.

Angelina so it's just the current state of affairs until it's disproven right?

There is a lot of such examples in history.

Foxies

very kind of you to say and i admire you for your way of expressing yourself. i try a lot to help here but unfortunately i can't express myself like you but i am working on it

Vanessa There is a lot of such examples in history.

of course, there were also people who believed that the earth was a disc and some of them were scientists and not just crazy catholics.

gwen If you are being forced or coerced into wearing a belt, you are a victim of sexual abuse.

i must disagree i do feel very confined by the belt but not as a victim of sexual abuse

Angelina The courts (and society) would see this very differently. A prosecutor would achieve a conviction with two very simple questions...
"Is the victim under 18, yes or no?"
"Was there interference in the child's genitalia, yes or no?"

"Thankyou Your Honour, there will be no further questions."

Angelina I'm sorry, but it is.

I dearly hope that abuse or not, that this experience fades into your past without having left any harm. However, even if that's the case, it's still abuse.

It took me a long time to recognize many events in my past as abuse, but that did not make them any less wrong.

Sin "Was there interference in the child's genitalia, yes or no?"

and that is exactly the point that one has to look at in a much more differentiated way, but that is not usual in germany and many other countries.

gwen

as i said, it's just my personal feeling. i know that legally it's abuse, but what are the alternatives? i can go to the police or the authorities, but what they do is clearly more abuse to me than what my father does.

a_father

Oh the ethics of this! It could even be a medical school topic to discuss!

a_father is correct that there might be societal benefits to prosecuting Angelina father for confining her against her will in a chastity belt, which is in fact real and physical bondage. A prosecution might save other young ladies from a similar fate by scaring other parents/guardians from doing the same.

But does anyone really think the Angelina wouldn't suffer too at his persecution? It is clear from her posts that she loves him and probably (reluctantly) supports him. Prosecuting him would cause him emotional pain, yes, but it would no doubt bring severe emotional pain to Angelina herself!

In the cold light of day there is no easy resolution to Angelina's predicament.

While I could never condone her father's actions, and don't really agree with her current viewpoint, I am heartened that she gives every indication that she is growing up to be a strong and intelligent woman who will no doubt be capable of making her own decisions regarding her own happiness as she gains adulthood. Many other girls should be so lucky! In the long view perhaps her father hasn't done a bad job of raising her as a single parent. He certainly did a better job that my own father!

If this sounds like I am defending his actions in regard to her chastity belt (and thigh bands), I am certainly not. His only defense that he can offer is that he did it out of love and not malice. Even so, I like most of society, condemn him for what we consider a misguided belief system and physical abuse of her body.

Angelina what are the alternatives?

Document it extensively on video.
Say to your father "Dad, I love you very much, but I'm not doing this anymore. You're removing the belt and I'm moving out. Oh, and you will be paying for my new apartment, and giving me an allowance of $x for the rest of your life."

If he disagrees... well, I'm sure you can be persuasive. ;-)

That's one alternative.

Foxies

you have described it very well (once again). thank you for your differentiated view and yes, that is exactly the crucial point. in short: i hate the belt, but i don't hate my father.

Sin Oh, and you will be paying for my new apartment, and giving me an allowance of $x for the rest of your life."

well, i am assured of that if i continue to wear the belt. i understand what you mean, but there is also another point. my father knows exactly that he is putting a big burden on me by wearing the belt. even though he enforces it very energetically, i know how much he values it and somehow i also want to make him proud. i know this all sounds very strange to outsiders, but some feelings are hard to describe in words.

Foxies His only defense that he can offer is that he did it out of love and not malice.

Well, I don't believe he does it out of love. In my point of view he, directly spoken, likes girls in chastity belts. If you want to know, what makes me think this, feel free to ask... I have no evidence. Anyway, I don't know @Angelina personally. But I have clues that give a neutral observer a certain suspicion (and I told her).
And if you take love out of the equation, a different picture emerges. And that's exactly why it's good that the statute of limitations in the event of abuse is so long. Imagine @Angelina found a hidden camera in her room at some point ... Do you think, this would change the whole situation? Whatever is happening right now, @Angelina only endures it because she thinks it happens as love. That's why I am of the opinion that parents should never reach for a chastity belt. As a result, children are abused by those who should actually be the safest people to trust in life.
I know @Angelina and I will never come to a consensus here. And I really hope I'm wrong.