Parental approval and arranged marriage

Vanessa

My parents are a bit similar about it,if I want to date someone,they should meet him/her and have a talk together.They’re pretty open minded about it,the ethnicity and religion is not a criteria,and I.m allowed to date men and women.But they take extra care that he/she respect me,treat me well,not do any dangerous activity(using drugs,being alcoholic,spending time in bad company...);being smart and well educated is important too.Of course,they should wear normal clothing(no ripped jeans or similar),not using vulgar language,etc...

I guess it is similar to Sara2001’s parents requirements.

P.S.:In my case,if my parents approve a boyfriend/girlfriend,it means he/she will probably be approved to marry me later,if he/she propose me,too.

HHelen

I'm pretty sure a parental approval is mandatory.

Vanessa

HHelen

It is not very pleasant,but I think it is understandable.And manageable.

To be honest,I never liked to get a "No.",but,most of the times,they were right.

Natescage And for those who have dateing restrictions has anyone ever had a crush on you so hard that they tryed to change themselves for you to meet your parents approval?

In my case,of course.But not about money!😉 They took care to wear normal clothes(ripped jeans,gothic look and so are not a good start to get such approval),stay calm(even if they don't like the meeting or my parents' questions),sometimes tend to make my parents think he/she is a better or more serious student than he/she is,etc...No big changes,but acting a bit differently to increase the chances to get the approval.

Renita

🤣

Natescage

Laura how much money would your family want the person to make? And for those who have dateing restrictions has anyone ever had a crush on you so hard that they tryed to change themselves for you to meet your parents approval?

Megan

Natescage I think everyone has seen everything before therefore no. I don't think anyone will try to become a foot taller or a billionaire to impress someone else. At least that would be very sad way to live your life.

Laura

Natescage how much money would your family want the person to make?

In $$$? Let's say at least 6 digits

reactionary69

Megan Mini Mike certainly would. But then he has way more money to burn than me. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

reactionary69

Laura I see. Hypergamy in action. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Megan

Laura In $$$? Let's say at least 6 digits

That makes some sense if you are going to live in NYC. Would that be like other hackers like you, doctors, lawyers. You went to MIT with family so you must have spent time in the same places as crazy wealthy people too.
I finally received help from my parents to get moving in love although really the husband being so cool was the most helpful part.

Do your parents often socialize with you at parties or anything like that?
Finding a husband was never a priority for me either as trying to plan that feels so fake but the parents introduced us and we sort of re-found each other.

Laura

reactionary69 Hypergamy in action

No. Segregation 🤣

Natescage

Laura lol Laura.. mabey someone will get there one day lol. The pool of People in the USA with that kind of money is shrinking however, if I recall correctly what I've read. You might have to wait a while. Would you mom negatiate about this if you couldn't find a husband?

Laura

Natescage The pool of People in the USA with that kind of money is shrinking however, if I recall correctly what I've read

Not in NYC, that's not big money really

Natescage

Laura true NYC is mad expensive although me and some classmates have considered moving there after school. Actually Laura I have a classmate from NYC who is rich and his friend is even richer (family has there own jet aircraft). Mabey I can out him in touch with you? Lol.

Megan

Laura Not in NYC, that's not big money really

Well in the country where I live I can only think of a couple of jobs that make those kinds of salaries. You also have the stock market and crypto people out in NYC. I imagine you have a lot of other things that bring in that kind of $ probably way to many for me to think of.

HHelen

Natescage Mabey I can out him in touch with you? Lol.

How about my daughter?

Renita

Natescage Actually Laura I have a classmate from NYC who is rich

@Laura , you might lose that opportunity, because @HHelen is your competitor now 😃

Natescage

HHelen are you in new York?

Christine

HHelen How about my daughter?

How about me?

HHelen

Natescage are you in new York?

New Jersey.

reactionary69

Renita 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Laura

@Dee how about you? 🤣