What Are Attitudes Toward ...

Avery

I have not read all the answers and frankly it took me three times to understand the question.

from a purely physical point of view, this person is no longer a virgin, but perhaps it is possible to have the hymen restored at the cost of health insurance, at least if one attaches importance to it. from a psychological point of view, this girl is of course still a virgin, it is not her fault that her virginity was taken from her by force.

I think couples should talk openly with each other, especially if it is very important to one partner that the girl is still a virgin, as I said, maybe this can be restored.

I hope I have understood the question correctly

Tonyand03

Thanks for thinking of me as some sort of oracle on this.

Alas, I am afraid I am as in the dark as all of you. I have read several theories (such as it can help keep bacteria our which might convey some evolutionary advantage to the human female) but none are very convincing to me. The jury is still out so far as I know in the scientific communities.

Foxies Thanks for that, Foxies. Maybe it really is God's way of helping to keep you pure.

HHelen For the parents' convenience.

And not only.
I do not think of myself as a radical, but I like keep my hymen inside me.
It is a symbol, and as all symbols, it is important.

Ines

Symbols are important but prone to idolatry: being tied to hymen could not be really meaningful. Better to stick to the mindset than to the physical factor.

Differently from the past with all superstitions and magical stuff, today we know for sure (and we have even some examples in this discussion) that it could be lost even by accident. Or with time. Or it could be even miss from the start. Basically it is no more an accurate virginity indicator, it is just... A symbol of luck? Is like knees which never got bruised while playing.
It doesn't even get lacerated for sure by intercourse: intact hymen does not ensure the absence of sex as much as a lacerated one does not mean that the deed was done.

But the rules are rules. No hymen, no virginity.
And sex has no exclusive on that.
...does that means that physical virginity is an hoax?
I think it is a surpassed symbol as much as a flat Earth model.

We really need a clearer definition. We must understand if virginity means purity and abstention or just having an intact membrane which relates to sex but not always.

LoonyMel We really need a clearer definition. We must understand if virginity means purity and abstention or just having an intact membrane which relates to sex but not always.

I can understand your approach, and even we share some points, but in general I so not agree with you.
I will not discuss about the social construction about the hymen, it is true, but it is a good construction and quite accurate. It is true that some girls do not lose their hymen when they are deflowered, or more usually do not lose all the membrane, but in general, hymen is teared with it. It is true that some girls can lose it accidentally, but again they are exceptional, not normal.
Hymen is the symbol of purity and even we can not make the symbol more important than purity, (if a virgin is raped, for me she is still virgin), we can not give away all the importance to the symbol.
I know that my opinion is mine and I do not want export it, and I know my opinion is founded in my own feeling and principles and not in an universal science, but my moral makes me value the virginity. I think that a good girl should not have any kind of sex before marriage, and, we came back to the symbol, a girl that touches herself can maintain her hymen intact, but she is not virgin anymore, or maybe, if I am generous I can consider her a "second division" virgin.
It is not science, it is not mathematics, it is only my values.
If you allow me a funny comparison... snooze with a big open mouth, obviously does not harm anyone, does not make bad to environment... and however, I do not like it, and I will not make it ever.

It seems to me that it can be reduced to the sentence "I want to do sexual things but I am scared for religious mumbo jumbo. How can I cheat the rules in order to get both heaven and sex?"

Ines I don't think any guy here would accept to do nothing sexual until marriage

Ines Was your mother such a good girl before marriage or was this kind of moral lifestyle created to make you wear a chastity belt? I ask this question because I know how the belt came into your family.
And: I don't expect an answer because you shouldn't tell others private things about your mother. This question is only to make you think about the whole situation.

Avery So how would this be perceived by those who consider virginity in a person important, especially in a partner?

I would stay away from a guy like that.

Ines

Well, church made the rules.. If it is a sin for their rules, then it is a sin for those who follow the rules of said religion. Either someone take the full book or does not try.

This reminds me those old stories where people tricked the devil by using loopholes in contracts, but this time the one they are trying to mock is God himself.
Way to go with faith, I must say.

Ines Qold question... is oral / anal sex a sin if it happens beflre marriage... there are different and very controversoal answers to this qjedtion, in my opinion:

1. It is a sin because all the sluttines that comes by it was made by the devil
2. It is a sin because sex before marriage is a sin in general
3. It isn't a sin because there is no chance to become pregnant. This answer is based in the belief that sex before marriage is only a sin because there is no 100% safety of pregnancy before marriage what can easily lead to a child having no married parents / only one parent or him /her being killed (abortion)
4. It is a sin because sexual amusememt is only to be shared berween married persons ... what would also reduce the desire to cheat is the beloved husband / wife is not as good in bed as you would wish him to be ... whenconly having had sex with one person you can't compere it to others.

So the answer is a yes and no. Maybe it's better to be safe in being a good person, this related tl the ones who give, but also to the ones who recieve this kind of sex, to relinquish habing these variations of sex. Still, because it is am indefinite answer ... it won't be a very bad sin, rather a help to be safed from the desire of comitting a sin.