How do you raise your children?
curious Don't mix up intelligence and education.
i'm not doing that, i'm just saying that there are those cases, that's why i think that parents don't always have the ability to be more intelligent than their children, that can be through education, but also through other things. you can't compensate for everything with life experience.
Avery Reason I ask is I have periodic tiffs with my Dad about what I am allowed to wear. I'm 21.
inside the house it doesn't matter, i can even be naked if i want to, outside the house he always checks what i'm wearing before i go out and whether it suits the occasion.
- Edited
Kaja I'm adult like them.
You and I are apparently exactly the same age. But I am not an adult like them. They have more life experience, more money, a big house, four cars, they offer free food and I love them. So if Dad wants me to keep my bottom covered at the beach I do it. Well, half of it.
Avery I wonder if people here who are parents set standards for what kind of clothing their children can wear, or not wear, especially out of the house and how closely they monitor them.
With small children, parents naturally dictate what the children may and may not wear. This expands over time and thus also shapes the taste of the child.
What a child may not wear should actually be clear, unless you are toped by relatives.
So I did not like that my 8-year-old daughter was given a bikini. From that moment on, only a bikini came into question as swimwear. The whole summer vacation she wanted to wear only the bikini, even if we wanted to visit anything. Have any of you ever discussed with an 8-year-old for 3/4 of an hour until she finally put on at least a pair of shorts over the bikini?
Mr-TM Have any of you ever discussed with an 8-year-old for 3/4 of an hour until she finally put on at least a pair of shorts over the bikini?
An interesting take, I think, by a German, to a girl wearing a bikini. So many Germans on the net chastise us stodgy Americans because we resist coed naked saunas and incidental family nudity.
Avery An interesting take, I think, by a German, to a girl wearing a bikini. So many Germans on the net chastise us stodgy Americans because we resist coed naked saunas and incidental family nudity.
Well, it's a little complicated.
My children have been brought up openly. That means that nudity was not taboo. We parents saw them naked, e.g. when bathing. But they also saw us naked, for example, when we went from the bedroom to the bathroom.
But it is, at least for me, a big difference if we were naked in the sauna, where everyone is, or if my daughter goes to see the Rhine Falls in a bikini at the age of 8.
I thought she was too young for that.
Ines but with 16 or 17 years it was a common scene.
My daughter was just half that age.
From a rather pro-nudism perspective, I would argue that a bikini might even be more provocative than toplessness or full nudity is, because it sort of singles out the chest as an area that deserves special attention, which seems rather inappropriate to me with prepubescent girls. I would definitely favor a one-piece bathing suit for younger girls like that from a modesty perspective, as it seems to offer the best of both worlds - keeps all the potential taboo areas covered while not singling out undeveloped body parts as taboo yet.
But irrespective of your culture's attitude to nudity, I think it is important to establish that different clothing styles are appropriate for different situations. And the stakes for that are probably even higher in cultures where nudity is not just a blanket taboo topic. There is a time for streetwear, a time for swimwear, a time for nudity and a time for formal attire, and while there is certainly a bit of overlap between those groups, there are some things that are inappropriate, be that getting naked at school or wearing swimwear to church, streetwear to the pool or formal wear to the beach.
Avery But I am not an adult like them. They have more life experience, more money, a big house, four cars, they offer free food and I love them. So if Dad wants me to keep my bottom covered at the beach I do it. Well, half of it.
Because you value the life experience of your father you show how smart you are.
I came early to the conclusion it is good to think about what older people say. Often they have a broader overview and can better judge situations through their experience. This is not to follow them blindly, but to use your brain and think it through.