Single again chastity

Renita

Angelina she is no longer interested in wearing a belt.

Her mom could set it as a condition.

Angelina

Christine Initially she didn't get my idea seriously when I took her measurement. Later I came with the belt and told her what I knew about her sexual activity. She couldn't deny it and had to agree for a belt.

so you already ordered the belt when you talked to your mother about everything? i think that is quite a risk, the belt is not cheap and your mother could also have refused

Renita Her mom could set it as a condition.

Since christine is no longer financially dependent on her mother, her mother no longer has the means to impose these conditions.

Renita

Angelina her mother no longer has the means to impose these conditions

She can decline to wear her belt.

Christine

curious Did she project her need to be belted on you and that was the reason why she kept you in the belt?

Possible. I wish I guessed it earlier.

curious Or was that not projection of her needs but just ensuring you could not have "fun"?

She regretted she didn't know about chastity belt when I was a teen.

Sasha You’re mom sounds a lot like how I used to be

Yes, I have the same impression.

MissBlossom and ask if that's something that she feels she needs.

I don't want to go so far yet.

Angelina so you already ordered the belt when you talked to your mother about everything?

No, we discussed before and she tentatively agreed.

Angelina think that is quite a risk, the belt is not cheap and your mother could also have refused

Then it could be one more empty belt.

MissBlossom It doesn't sound like she's wearing it for @Christine

Ofc, she doesn't. She didn't like her behavior, especially being caught.

MissBlossom

Renita She can decline to wear her belt.

It doesn't sound like she's wearing it for @Christine. It sounds like she's wearing it for herself because without it she does things with guys that she later regrets. She gets her benefit regardless of what Christine does.

Angelina

Renita She can decline to wear her belt.

she could, but apparently she hasn't

MissBlossom She gets her benefit regardless of what Christine does.

right, she has accepted it so far, why should she now use leverage against christine, that makes no sense

Jonas

Christine She didn't like her behavior, especially being caught.

Wanting to bring your own behaviour back in line with your own beliefs and values is a great reason to wear a chastity belt.

Being caught would have brought this idea home with a bump and made the change actually happen.

It all seems to be working out well... but I hope you don't feel too much resentment about your time in the belt @Christine.

Angelina

Christine She regretted she didn't know about chastity belt when I was a teen.

do you think, especially in view of your first marriage when you were young, that you might have made a different decision if you had worn a belt?

Christine Then it could be one more empty belt.

and a complete waste of money

Joh and educate responsible behaviour they use the belt as solution which may be in just a few situations an option of last resort.

well, the argument is true, but it reaches its limits if you think, like my father, that it is precisely the belt that teaches me responsible behaviour.

MissBlossom

curious Did you ever ask your mother about her values? For example what her idea is about masturbation? Does she think it should be allowed or should a belt be used to make self gratification impossible for the wearer?

When I asked about this, Christine said

Christine MissBlossom and ask if that's something that she feels she needs.

I don't want to go so far yet.

MissBlossom

curious
You would, you have, you did, and you do! lol

I don't entirely disagree. See MissBlossom

Christine MissBlossom and ask if that's something that she feels she needs.

I don't want to go so far yet.

@Christine, that little "yet" invites so much curiosity. When do you want to go so far?

Avery

Jonas Wanting to bring your own behaviour back in line with your own beliefs and values is a great reason to wear a chastity belt.

Methinks it might be a good reason to have one around in a tough situation but I don't believe one should default to a belt to behave in what one thinks is a moral fashion.

Christine

Jonas Being caught would have brought this idea home with a bump and made the change actually happen.

Otherwise she would never agree for a belt.

Jonas but I hope you don't feel too much resentment about your time in the belt

I felt humiliated.

Angelina do you think, especially in view of your first marriage when you were young, that you might have made a different decision if you had worn a belt?

No, I don't think so. I'm a different type. Maybe premarital virginity, but it wouldn't make too much difference.

Jonas

Avery It's an interesting point. I saw on NOFAP they want you to grow as a person and choose to refrain as opposed to being restrained but I don't think this applies to every person and problem.
Some moral failings aren't the result of complicated deeply held neuroses, they're just people acting out because they can. In fact they (we) only ever start to deal with our behaviour when forced to do so.
Eg. My own sex drive needs policing as opposed to pleasing or analysing. This is okay to me because I've broadened my sense of self to include the belt. It is an integral part of me.
This is not to say that people shouldn't work on themselves and strengthen their moral fibre, this is exactly right for some. But for others, we know what we should be doing, higher self style, and just want to get the job done already

Avery

Jonas This is not to say that people shouldn't work on themselves and strengthen their moral fibre

I think what sometimes is missing in normal life situations are support systems. I frequently mention Muslims or Mormons as groups which refrain (pretty much) from sexual activity outside of marriage and never use belts. This makes up 1/4 of the world. But they are immersed in societies which preach these ideas. I've tried to change my life situation to make not getting off easier and that has made working on myself and strengthening my moral fibre considerably easier.

pestulens

Avery I frequently mention Muslims or Mormons as groups which refrain (pretty much) from sexual activity outside of marriage and never use belts

I wonder how many in those groups actually refrain as they are 'supposed' to instead of just keeping it quiet.

Joh

Avery I think what sometimes is missing in normal life situations are support systems.

The support and moral education should come from the parents.
I have the feeling our societies is loosing a moral and this view of the whole in which all people, beliefs and opinions are entitled to exist. They become more and more rigid in their view and deny the existence of others.

Different religions provide a framework in which one can grow up and which gives protection. But as with everything, it can be misused to establish extreme views or even extreme actions. The same applies to political parties or to those who no longer believe in anything and deny everything that does not fit into their world view.

Avery

pestulens I wonder how many in those groups actually refrain as they are 'supposed' to instead of just keeping it quiet.

That probably tells us more about you than about them.

Kaja

pestulens I know some girls whose go to church and nobody of them wait to marriage 😀

pestulens

Avery true, though probably not in the way your thinking.

Avery

Joh The support and moral education should come from the parents.

Certainement. No doubt we have some strong family structures here, but too often, methinks, we have people just clapping their daughters into a belt and saying they are doing them a favor.

Joh

Avery we have people just clapping their daughters into a belt and saying they are doing them a favor.

I looks like it is the easy way for the parents. Instead doing their job and educate responsible behaviour they use the belt as solution which may be in just a few situations an option of last resort.

pestulens

Avery Joh
From the cases here (which dose introduced some selection bias) it seems like using a belt isn't really possible unless a "strong" family structure allredy exists. I agree though, we have a lot of cases of parents using belts as a substitute for teaching their daughters good judgment or because they failed to persuade their kids to follow the way of life they think is best by the point they are growing up.

Joh

Angelina if you think, like my father, that it is precisely the belt that teaches me responsible behaviour.

He can phrase it in this way but obviously the belt forced you. You had only two choices. Break with your father or go along his dictate.

Angelina

Joh You had only two choices. Break with your father or go along his dictate.

Of course, I never claimed his reasoning was correct, it's just an example of how to turn things around as you see fit

Andrew

Kaja I know some girls whose go to church and nobody of them wait to marriage 😀

And then, being pregnant, they go to a church wedding in a white dress symbolizing spiritual purity and virginity... 😉 😆

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