I have recently heard on a podcast that apparently a woman's sex drive increases with frequent orgasms, whereas a man's increases with waiting for an orgasm. I do not have the experience to see if the former is true, of course, but that would provide at least some justification for double standards on gender.
But I still think you should not expect others to endure what you are not willing to endure yourself regardless of gender, unless of course there is a good reason. Now obviously male orgasm denial is not exactly the same experience as female orgasm denial, but just handwaving it as "eh, it will be less unpleasant for them than it would be for me" seems like a huge cop-out, and that makes it hard to justify it as a good reason.
