• GeneralMale

  • Other people want me to wear a chastity belt

Raziel if Carlos' girlfriend cannot see him as a different guy than her ex, then she is going through an issue she needs to solve first before entering the relationship. I don't know if she had time to forget her ex, but carrying that baggage into this current relationship is going to stress you out, Carlos

Strongly agree with this. ⬆

But as @pestulens writes, it is a big change. The belt was already in place at the start of the relationship and also your acceptance of control wasn't in any real doubt back then. Time is required here.

In terms of cheating, you are a different man and should not be treated as if you've been unfaithful when you haven't. That would be very wrong.

Hope things are going ok @Carlos.

      Raziel I had a scenario where a woman I once dated, was actually married and I didn't know that until many months later.

      Chastity belt could be an answer

          Laura For him or for her? Absurdity of both is the same.

              Jonas In terms of cheating, you are a different man and should not be treated as if you've been unfaithful when you haven't. That would be very wrong.

              right, i think that is the crucial point, every person is different

              Renita With engraved marital status 😃

              😂

              PS: @Carlos Any Updates?

                  Laura
                  Ironically, I suggested it for foreplay, but she was extremely shy. She admitted everything later, and she lives in an abusive relationship, but enjoyed my company more, because I was kind and nurturing. I didn't bother with her since, because it was messed up being the side piece. This was way back in 2017, so it's all good now. Plus, I prefer to keep it monogamous.

                  There is more to this story, but it is off-topic and inappropriate. Nothing else about it is good anyway, so it's whatever.

                    Renita With engraved marital status

                    Do you have such engraving on your belt, just in case? 😂

                        Renita No, but probably I should, mentioning I'm still single.

                        sounds interesting, engravings in the belt like "unmarried daughter" or "wife" haha 😂

                            Angelina sounds interesting, engravings in the belt like "unmarried daughter" or "wife" haha 😂

                            "Unmarried"
                            "UnUnmarried"

                            That way you don't have to erase. You can just add. lol

                                Renita No, but probably I should, mentioning I'm still single.

                                But what would you need it for?

                                    Laura But what would you need it for?

                                    Because locked chastity belt produce a suspicion, that I'm actually married.

                                      Angelina
                                      I have 3 aunts and they each have 4-5 kids from different guys, so I don't know if it is them or the guy, but divorce is very common in my family. I once attended a school event for one of my cousins, and they asked for their last name, and I was like, it could be A..., B...., or C..., unless they kept our grandfather's last name, D.... They school officials thought I was being ridiculous, you could see it in their face they thought I was making it hard on them.

                                          4 days later

                                          Update.

                                          Well it has just been over a week now and I am still mostly free of the belt. I have not been wearing it out of the house when I go to work or when she is away at work or overnight when I am sleeping. Life is so much easier without the hassle of the belt. I am in a much happier place right now that i have been in a long time. Like I think why did I ever put up with any of this I should of done this years ago.

                                          I have had just one instance where I was locked back in but that was for a night out with my friends drinking. I had previously agreed to that so I was not bothered about it. I did come in quite late that night and she was sleeping so had to sleep in it. One of our mutual friends was there and she made a very odd comment that made me think for a min but in the end I concluded it was pretty innocent. She made the comment oh your misses has started letting you out of the cage. It did make me a little shaky for a few min but I figured out it was probably because this was the 1st time in about 4 months I was out at a quiz night mid week.

                                          My partner has been taking it better than I actually thought she would. She has mostly not talked about it but has brought it up on a few occasions. The morning after the night out I had she said "was that not easier going out like that. You are used to the belt and it is no hassle for me to wear it and it gives her so much peace of mind me wearing it". I just turned round and said you try wearing one long enough to get used to it and see how you feel after that. The only other occasion she brought it up was Sunday night she had the belt waiting for me after I had a shower and a shave. She said that "she wanted me ready to go for when she gets back on Tuesday". I just ignored that and put the belt back in the cupboard. She did go quiet for the rest of the evening and was very short with me when I asked her anything.

                                          Giving me the silent treatment did kind of annoy me so I decided to get my own back. I decided to leave my laptop open and on in the living room with a load of tabs open looking at flats in a different city along with a few job applications. I know she has seen it as the laptop was moved and I can see a few websites she went to when i was out.

                                          I actually feel quite pleased at myself for actually standing up for myself and not buckling to my partners unreasonable and unjustified anxieties. Lets see what the next few weeks brings wish me luck.

                                            Carlos I’m glad you’ve stood up for yourself, sometimes we struggle with this.
                                            But remember to be there for her at the same time. No you aren’t the one who hurt her, but it’s hard to trust people again. Just be there and talk as much as she needs you to

                                                Carlos
                                                Overall, that's great to hear!

                                                I have a suggestion, though. Being strong and unshakable is sexy. Being petty and seeking little revenges is weak and not sexy. The next time she gives you the silent treatment, shrug it off, do your own thing and ignore it. See if she reacts differently.

                                                  Carlos good to hear from you, I was beginning to worry but glad to hear things are going well.
                                                  It seems like she hasn't abandoned the idea of getting you to ware again, but isn't going to try and force it.
                                                  I agree with what others have said though, the passive aggressive thing with the tabs is probably not all that helpful in the long run, even if it was probably satisfying at the time. I'd say if she gets like that again probably just give her space and let her know you're willing to talk about it when she's ready.

                                                  The incident with your friend is funny in retrospect, though I can see why it would be nerve-wracking in the moment.
                                                  Congratulations, stay strong.