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hi,
i'm sorry that you still suffer so much under the tapes, i agree it's bad and definitely the most restrictive thing about my chastity gear for me too.
as for the toilet, i always try it this way. i let it drip very slowly as the others have already described, if i'm lucky i don't hit the tighbands and don't have to clean them extra. i have a spray bottle and wet cloths with which i can clean myself very well, of course i always feel a little dirty but i do my best
as far as stretching or avoiding unpleasant positions is concerned, i can't give you any advice. i try to change my sitting or lying position as much as possible, but it doesn't really help
last but not least, i also have a house with stairs and if i have to walk stairs in school or in public, i always hold on to the railing so that no accidents happen to me.
all the best, I hope you'll be able to handle it better in the future but I envy you too that you don't have to wear it all the time