Jonas I think we have the same opinions. I'm just to lazy to express myself clearly in my bad english. Seriously I never believed my teachers that I would need english again and they were so right about it.
So I try to express myself in a better way. This will be a short explanation and doesn't cover everything I want to write about it.

Masturbation itself isn't bad I think we have the same opinion about it.
I think in a young age (maybe 14 - 25 I don't want to draw a sharp line) you need it to understand what you like and how you like it (and with this I mean explore everything even parts of the so called fetish world). To talk about more decent, don't think you know anything about metal music if you only listened to 2 or 3 songs or even 2 or 3 bands.
[And yeah again I described it way to short so maybe many of you get the wrong idea of what I mean, we will see...]
Somethings you need to explore with yourself first and somethings you can only explore with a partner. And if you have build your knowledge base you can start to make better decisions. Because you don't have to say anymore "I think..." or "I believe..." instead you can say "I know...".
[Yeah and again this description is way to short.]
So real chastity the way you and Fatherof3 describe should start when your knowledge base is set and you know what you want from the world.
More words that I thought but way to short to express myself so you really understand what I mean. But if I'm right about your thinking you will understand the core of what I want to express. Even if I don't know how many grammar, tenses and other mistakes this text has.

      Kurt
      It acceptable for a boy, but it is awful for a girl. Obviously is my opinion, but for me there are things, smoke for example, that are not good, but in girls is much worse.

          Kurt Thank you for making such a great effort to write. I can understand you well.

          Masturbation itself isn't bad

          Somethings you need to explore with yourself first and somethings you can only explore with a partner.

          I understand exactly what you're saying and I'm sure it's true for many people.

          However, my personal experience has led me to conclude that masturbation was bad for me. I would have done better had I waited for a partner and been entirely focused on her rather than on the fantasies I developed through masturbation. Chastity works for me now and would have worked then,

          I do not think those in chastity (or those trying to save their virginity for marriage) should masturbate.

              Ines

              It acceptable for a boy, but it is awful for a girl. Obviously is my opinion, but for me there are things, smoke for example, that are not good, but in girls is much worse.

              Ines, you write elsewhere that there are girls for whom chastity doesn't suit (for reasons of temperament etc).

              Could you agree that might be men for whom chastity also suits very well (...perfectly, in fact)? Again for reasons of temperament etc.

              Eg: I feel that my choice to wear a chastity belt corrects my selfishness and excess.

              • Ines replied to this.

                  Kurt Sure. masturbation is fun and all. Feels good yes. However. Not necessarily a need. Sex is still possible without having had masturbated ever. It would probably be a surprise when you first climax. lol.

                      Jonas I agree. To a point. It depends on why you are chastised. If for saving yourself for marriage. Then sure. Why not. Might make being in chastity more difficult. lol.
                      If you were caught masturbating while Grandma was visiting. then. May be you have a problem that could be remedied with chastity. If agreed upon of coarse.
                      If you have a problem with excluding your partner with extra curricular activities. Yes. Masturbation should not be happening while in chastity.

                        Jonas

                        well, i've heard that the desire for cigarettes diminishes at some point, but i don't know if this also applies to sexual pleasure.

                        Fatherof3 It would probably be a surprise when you first climax. lol.

                        hmm... i wonder how an orgasm feels for someone who has never masturbated before having sex for the first time. must be a very exciting but maybe also scary feeling.

                              Angelina well, i've heard that the desire for cigarettes diminishes at some point,

                              Absolutely yes it does. And the cravings no longer govern your behaviour.

                              but i don't know if this also applies to sexual pleasure.

                              I think Ivana on MisterPoll is correct:

                              "Also, for me, there were frustrating moments, where I desperately tried to defeat my own cb. It always kept firm, yet, and I am glad about that. For my girls, too, I have indications that they tried things, which is just natural. In case our cbs would perfectly prevent any attempt to access from the very beginning, we all would give in any attempts after short time and as a consequence, it would become less frustrating for us. "

                              Certainly when quitting smoking it was the stopping and starting that was the torture. Once you've absolutely stopped, or cigarettes are out of reach, you accept the situation.

                              Angelina hmm... i wonder how an orgasm feels for someone who has never masturbated before having sex for the first time. must be a very exciting but maybe also scary feeling.

                              Would also help to make a very strong bond with your partner I think.

                                    Jonas Would also help to make a very strong bond with your partner I think.

                                    maybe, but i won't find out, despite the belt, because i already masturbated before my relationship.

                                        Angelina I think it's more about the time spent without masturbating that makes the difference. This is why I understand when people on here return to chastity following divorce. Everyone can choose to "save" themselves for a future partner and it's an amazing gift at any time.

                                            Jonas
                                            Jonas, I only share my opinion that is not more or less valid than other.
                                            In my opinion, the relationship with keyholder have to be based in trust, but it is true that it involves a bit of hierarchy, and, a boy does not fit as wearer here.
                                            Of course, if a boy wish it I am not anyone to deny it.

                                            Jonas Ines, you write elsewhere that there are girls for whom chastity doesn't suit (for reasons of temperament etc).

                                            I believe firmly in this. And I have an example in home. However, probably it can change with time, I believe.

                                                  Thank you for answering my question @Ines. I understand that you're stating your opinion.

                                                  Ines is true that it involves a bit of hierarchy, and, a boy does not fit as wearer here.

                                                  I can understand this. Both the traditional male role as head of a household and a marriage of equals is changed where one party holds such power over another. However, what if the key were in a safe, safe-deposit, or with another trusted party such as a parent?

                                                  The male is disempowered, not within his marriage or relationship, but by his own action. Chastity becomes his personal choice and the belt becomes a part of who he chooses to be and how he chooses to act (or not act).

                                                  Could this work, in your opinion?

                                                  • Ines replied to this.

                                                      Jonas Everyone can choose to "save" themselves for a future partner and it's an amazing gift at any time.

                                                      well, i would only do it if i knew there was a future partner. if i wore the belt because my father told me at the time: "you wear the belt to be a gift for your dream woman" i might think differently.

                                                          Jonas Could this work, in your opinion?

                                                          Of course it can works, for someone, but, of course, a man wearing chastity belt is out of sight for me.
                                                          I can not share any reason to see a man wearing it.

                                                          Jonas or with another trusted party such as a parent?

                                                          I do not like see a man without capability of decision, precisely, for me is one of the most important thinks in you.

                                                                Want for me, definitely. Make this into a poll, that would make things interesting.

                                                                Ines I do not like see a man without capability of decision, precisely, for me is one of the most important thinks in you.

                                                                Ah, I understand. Thank you for being so patient and clear with me.

                                                                As for me, I see wearing a belt (or putting all kinds of other temptations out of reach) as a way of making the strongest possible decisions, decisions that even I myself would not be capable of undoing.

                                                                I guess it's an example of the contradiction inherent in power, can a powerful man create something that they themselves cannot destroy? But, such discussions are more than likely far off-topic! 😅

                                                                  Jonas It's all quite confusing really because even things that are healthy needs like food can change into unhealthy cravings.

                                                                  As I often say,it should not be excessive and not impact badly other parts of our lives.

                                                                  Jonas I think masturbation is pure self-gratification and know that it can take over your life

                                                                  Not if we do it,but not "pursuit the pleasure" of masturbation!😉

                                                                  Jonas I think a lot of the arguments between the generations about chastity stem from the fact that young adults want sexual freedom whereas their elders (often from personal experience) think that people need limits.

                                                                  But personal experience is more effective than advices from other people.

                                                                  Kurt

                                                                  I agree,knowing our own body is important to get;and give,pleasure with a partner(even more effective for same-sex relationship).

                                                                  Jonas

                                                                  I did both,and always preferred to have sex with a partner than masturbating.Way better.

                                                                  Jonas However, my personal experience has led me to conclude that masturbation was bad for me.

                                                                  I agree,it is mainly personal opinion.

                                                                  Angelina well, i've heard that the desire for cigarettes diminishes at some point, but i don't know if this also applies to sexual pleasure.

                                                                  I doubt so...

                                                                  Angelina hmm... i wonder how an orgasm feels for someone who has never masturbated before having sex for the first time. must be a very exciting but maybe also scary feeling.

                                                                  On the other hand,if the partner is a bit more skilled,he/she should be able to relieve the scary feeling!😉

                                                                  Jonas This is why I understand when people on here return to chastity following divorce.

                                                                  Only one of us,I think,and she's not very happy about it!😉

                                                                  Ines However, probably it can change with time, I believe.

                                                                  Do you think your sister would finally accept to wear one?

                                                                  Angelina if i wore the belt because my father told me at the time: "you wear the belt to be a gift for your dream woman" i might think differently.

                                                                  You would have accepted it more willingly?

                                                                                          Vanessa Jonas However, my personal experience has led me to conclude that masturbation was bad for me.

                                                                                          I agree,it is mainly personal opinion.

                                                                                          It is a personal decision, but remember, looking back, I'd say I made the wrong decision at the time.

                                                                                          If we exclude all non-consensual use, forget about the actual chastity belts, and just look at the honest, kindly communication between the generations here, it's more often than not very simple: The old folk are telling the young folk to wait for marriage and to watch out for masturbation. That's the experience they want to pass on. The locks and keys and bribery and arguments and resentment all stem from just how strongly the older folk want to pass on their message.

                                                                                          And, if I could go back in time, I'd be telling myself the same thing.

                                                                                              Vanessa On the other hand,if the partner is a bit more skilled,he/she should be able to relieve the scary feeling!😉

                                                                                              well, unless your partner hasn't had the experience either, then it can get very complicated.

                                                                                              Vanessa You would have accepted it more willingly?

                                                                                              i don't know, rather not, unless camryn would have liked it

                                                                                              Jonas It is a personal decision, but remember, looking back, I'd say I made the wrong decision at the time.

                                                                                              but that is perfectly normal. every human being makes more mistakes when he/she is young than later, because we are always learning in life.