In my family my father thinks masturbation and things like that make a woman selfish, so it's better to protect them from becoming selfish,.so she can focus on other things (incl..her partners pleasure).
fear of orgasm: why?
Sara2001 my father thinks masturbation and things like that make a woman selfish
after your wedding you will feel the pleasure of sex: what change before or after wedding in your father opinion? i mean: according to your father idea you could become "selfish" after wedding when you will start to have orgasm with your partner. isn't it right?
Angelina
I think it is not the same. In my opinion it is more similar to a sort of blackmail.
It is not so bad as force to the girl, of course, and I am not trying to say that it is the same, but it is not perfect.
For me, and you know it, only acceptable way, and only way in what you avoid reproaches, is totally free acceptance.
strictfather After wedding I have a husband. He knows what he gets before and/or can do what he think is necessary. I can accept this or marry someone else. That's why I would only marry someone when I absolutely trust him.
Maybe for some it's furthermore a fear of the daughter getting the wrong partner anywhen or becoming a victim anywhere... maybe it's also for safety reasons... sure, denying an orgasm then wouldn't be necessary... like via abstinence belt
mekekelo No empirical studies have ever shown any results like this.
My mother thinks differently in my case.
Foxies I just hope this forum does nothing to promote it.
I think we try to fight it, however I believe that every truculent story is a tale.
Force to someone to wear a belt should be such factory of resentment that no family can endure it. And in determined ages and environment is very difficult maintain such thing as a secret.
I usually do not think in myself as a person without empathy, but such stories are hard of believe for me.
mekekelo Parents do not have a right to abuse their child.
I agree 100% with sentiment behind this statement. I would go further: "No one has a right to abuse anyone."
But terms like abuse are slippery and ever changing. Even worse they become "fashionable" (or political as in politically correct).
When I was a little girl, if a child misbehaved with a parent present and the parent didn’t take action the parent was considered abusive, not teaching their child correct behaviour. That teaching might commonly include a smack to the legs.
In the Britain of today, a smack delivered to a child’s legs is abuse.
The fashion has changed!
The right to “free” speech is enshrined in law. To insult someone can be considered free speech and is thus protected. A parent can thus insult a child by telling they are an idiot or stupid. But doing it endlessly, and crushing a child’s belief in themselves while being a parental right is still abusive.
There are all sorts of parental rights that can lead to abuse. Parents will claim they are protecting the child. When is protection abuse?
Sadly, I do not know how to write correct laws to prevent such. I only know abuse when I see it. You will never convince me that pressuring anyone against their will into a mechanical device that prevents enjoyment of their own body, is anything but abuse. But clearly it happens within the law, as several poor girls here will testify.
- Edited
Foxies But clearly it happens within the law, as several poor girls here will testify.
It is happen because the children depended on the family and will not risk a worsening of the situation. They often believe that their parents would break off with them. If this is really the case, it is proof that they do not really love their children.
Finally there is nobody who wants to report the condition to appropriate agencies to improve the situation.
of course it is a kind of blackmail but it always depends on the advantages and disadvantages the girl has by wearing or not wearing the belt.
Of course, it is still the best way if it is voluntary. 
of course, i think it would even be the main reason to use a abstinence belt.
Joh It is happen because the children depended on the family and will not risk a worsening of the situation.
but isn't that normal ? it doesn't make sense to refuse to wear the belt if it would only have disadvantages outside the belt.
Angelina but isn't that normal ? it doesn't make sense to refuse to wear the belt if it would only have disadvantages outside the belt.
You are not in the situation to oversee the full impact on you.
I had my own experience on dependency in a relation and could see it first after some time after my divorce.
I have seen it by a friend of mine as well and understand why the laws were introduced especially to protect minors.
If you think this was done lightly and without good reason, then you are making it easy on yourself and closing your eyes to reality. No laws are introduced that do not have a valid reason. Whether they are always the best law is a moot point. However, the main point is true.
Have in mind you are still a minor and stuck in the situation.
Joh If you think this was done lightly and without good reason, then you are making it easy on yourself and closing your eyes to reality.
i don't close my eyes to reality, i just refuse when people or institutions who don't know what happens in families think they know better, i'm happy to take suggestions, even here in the forum, but the decision is ultimately made in families
Joh No laws are introduced that do not have a valid reason
Joh Have in mind you are still a minor and stuck in the situation.
well, i'll be 18 in 4 months, but i wouldn't say that my opinion will change then.
Angelina Maybe you don't want to understand what @Joh wants to say. Your opinion may change in ten years or so. Believe me, you don't become an adult over night when you turn 18 
. What your father does is abuse and you'll find out later in your life. This is, why I told you to collect all proves you have to be able to prove later on, what your father did (if you are real). This is the reason, why I have problems believing things I read here. Parents must always have in mind, that children become adults and exacly these children later demand accountability from them. And abuse stays abuse, even ten years later. And these parents can go to prison even ten years later.