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Jen You should make clear that you are you and your mother is your mother and her experience is not yours. They have no right to decide about your sexuality. They will try to talk you into the belt and once agreed, there is no way back. You should block every discussing about the belt. Best you leave the room, when your parents bring up this theme. Otherwise you end like other girls here. In a discussion you make mistakes. So best to avoid it in a way like 'We can talk about everything, but not about this.' Don't try to understand your mother in this case. Showing understanding is the first step into permanent chastity. You can say, I understand your point of view, but it's your way of life, not mine. And I refuse your methods (the belt).' Girls here who didn't have a choice try to write, that there are advantages too (I can't imagine, what this should be), so as not to have to admit that they are in a hopeless situation. It's like with the Stockholm syndrome (if you don't know, ask Google). At some point you show understanding for those who do this to you in order to be able to endure it better. But that doesn't make it any better.