Should I become a key holder ?

Sara2001 Very interesting development. From what I can read between the lines, she doesn't want the access to the key when she went back home. At least for the trial period.

right she also tests it sometimes at home how long she can hold out, sometimes with more and sometimes with less success.

Sara2001 From what you wrote, I think she would be happier if you modify your agreement and give her the key just in a closed envelope. So she wouldn't feel trapped, but could explore how it is to not follow the wishes of her body. She would also have the opportunity to be very proud when she gives you the closed envelope back on arrival.

the basic idea is good, but i would prefer a box that is secured with a number code, then she can contact me and at least has to talk to me before she opens the box. this would increase the chances that she will be clear about what she really wants.

Joh All your thoughts show that you have the ability and responsibility to be a good keyholder. If you keep it you will do it fine.

thank you, although it is still very difficult for me to be a key holder while at the same time my feelings about my belt are rather negative.

Joh You can also think about whether there is a way that you two have not yet thought of that is not so burdensome. Sometimes you just have to change your perspective to get new insights.

do you have any concrete ideas? otherwise i would say that the way we are currently going is a middle way. it is a middle way between remaining completely chaste and being completely free. but we have limited it for the time being in order to talk again, but it may also be that we keep this way.

Vanessa Don't you think she would feel more guilty,and it would hurt you a bit more,in this case(as you say it was the case for you both when she masturbated at your home,while you have to wait outside the room)?

no, on the contrary, i would be very happy if she would talk to me about her longings beforehand. if i would give her a sealed letter, there would only be two possibilities. either the letter would stay closed or she would open the letter. the box would create a contact between us before she would decide.

Vanessa .Being very clear on your agreement when starting would be helpful,yes.

that is why we need the contract

Vanessa I'm not totally sure it is so important to wait until marriage,

that's not the important point either, the important point is that we are in a relationship of equals and want to maintain the same status. if i didn't wear a belt, we wouldn't even be having this topic and i could delete the entire topic.

Joh For an answer I have to read the whole topic again and sort out my thoughts.

no problem, you don't have to go to all that effort we will think about it ourselves and if we think of something, we will write it here

Sara2001 I think for a start, the envelope is very easy to create and very easy to check. Of course a box is more connecting.

well, such a box would be more expensive, but that is not the main point. i am more concerned that if we are really serious, that we talk to each other before camryn makes the decision for or against the keys.

PS: short update, due to a holiday day camryn is with me since yesterday, we are trying to make 4 days until sunday afternoon. so far it works, i hope it stays that way

Vanessa Do you think it could damage your relationship,otherwise?

no i don't think so, but it would be camryn's first time having sex and i don't want her to regret it at some point because she feels selfish. i want it to be a complete pleasure and the best way to do that is for both of us to share the experience.

Vanessa Good opportunity to expand a bit the duration,and know how she manage it.

she did very well for the first 48 hours

Foxies . It was such an odd dynamic

it not only was, it still is

but we try to find the best solution for both of us

Vanessa The main test would be 2 to 3 weeks alone with your girlfriend,without taking her belt off except for showering...

of course, but at the moment camryn is still at school, in the summer holidays we will be together for 3 weeks, then it will be decided how it will go on after that.

Sara2001 Yes, and I still think a way for her to try it during the week would make her decision even easier. I think a closed envelope could still help a lot, because it's very easy to use, she has full control in case of emergency or in case she want to stop this, she could experience the feeling of wearing it without being under your control, she could feel how it is to do it for herself with a choice and of course she could show you how much she is into it, when she gives you the closed envelope back after a week at home.

i am still not a big fan of the envelopes, of course she can test it herself, as far as i know she is planning to do it this weekend. she will lock herself in the belt 24 hours before she is with me and then give me the keys. but the problem remains the same with the envelopes, either she opens the envelope or the envelope stays closed. there is no communication and communication is very important. i don't care if the envelope is open or closed at the end of the week, but i want to know what she feels, why she wants the keys and if i can convince her not to take the keys.

Joh Not if you have an agreement that she will first talk with you.

that's right and i think camryn would also talk to me first, i don't know yet. we'll wait and see how it develops until mid august.

Vanessa You would decide it right after trying for 2 to 3 weeks or wait a bit after?Some time to think about how it was for her would be useful...

now our contract runs until mid august, then camryn starts school again and i start my studies shortly after. it would be good to clarify beforehand how we want to continue.

Vanessa Not a bad idea,to extend a bit the duration this way.

that's right and almost everyone can keep themselves under control for 24 hours