christmas presents

Ines I can not say It, @Avery, I have not had ever such situation.

@Ines I believe that Amira's experience puts in serious doubt the premise on which many of the posts here rest: that to maintain chastity a female must be in a belt, plus maybe a bra and thigh bands.

She was born in a Muslim country. As far as I know all Muslim countries require young women to be virgins when they marry and I have never read that Muslim girls wear belts. So millions of Muslim women over time put the lie to the idea you need a belt to stay a virgin. I believe if Amira had stayed in her home country she would have succeeded without a belt just like all the others. Why not?

But Amira moves to Europe. Soon she is told that she must wear a belt. What changed? Just the ideas of the people she now lives with. The ideas are wrong. Millions of Muslim women prove it.

Avery
What has changed is the society around her.
For all of us there comes a time when we start to look for other role models than our parents and when peer groups have a larger influence on how we behave and see the world. If you live in an Islamic country, the peer group shares the value of chastity until marriage, virginity, e5c
In western countries similar values existed many years ago, but these days this has changed. The new normal (and I a not saying this is good or bad, just stating what is fact) is that about 50% of 16 year olds already have sexual experience and at 18 years only a small minority is still a virgin.
The more your own values deviate from what is considered normal in the overall society, the more difficult it becomes to actually adhere to those values and the more extreme measures to protect the values will be necessary. Hence a strict belt regime is the reaction to a society that is pushing for liberal sex.

Avery Amira had stayed in her home country she would have succeeded without a belt just like all the others. Why not?

You are right, but I believe that exist 2 main factors:

In one hand, in her country she will remain totally segregated, and reduced to home life. Even in more liberal muslim environment, this works this way.
Secondly, I believe most of girls, muslim or not, would touch theirselves if do not wear a belt.

Girls like you or @Jen are a step above us by virtue.
I think I am not a slut, but I appreciate that my belt is there so I don't have to check it.

Amira I think that you do big mistake.

Even it might be somehow off topic, but:
I wish you all a Merry Christmas! And concerned forum members a Merry Chastemas as well.

Ines I think I am not a slut

Please don't say things like that. Everyone knows that.

curious The more your own values deviate from what is considered normal in the overall society, the more difficult it becomes to actually adhere to those values and the more extreme measures to protect the values will be necessary. Hence a strict belt regime is the reaction to a society that is pushing for liberal sex.

Certainly, it is more difficult. I have described in detail some steps I have taken to help out like showering in a public place and putting on a belt when I have a weak period at night. And I have talked about the people I run against from Brigham Young University and Liberty where they have taken steps to teach good values and isolate themselves from general society. But they don't wear belts.

Never said it was easy.

Ines Secondly, I believe most of girls, muslim or not, would touch theirselves if do not wear a belt.

We will never resolve this disagreement. In countries where what women wear out of the house is controlled by their religious beliefs and people stop to pray five times a day, I don't know. I bet the number is substantially less.

Avery Please don't say things like that. Everyone knows that.

Yes, do not worry, I mean that I believe in these values, they are not forced in my, and however, I prefer do not test my weakness.
You and @Jen are different.

Ines I prefer do not test my weakness.

It is good to know what you are capable of. Overestimating yourself can quickly become a boomerang for you.
But that doesn't mean that you can't work on expanding your limits. You don't do that in sport either.

Avery For me it looks like your belt is similar to a seatbelt. The best is you never need it but in an emergency it helps you.

Joh For me it looks like your belt is similar to a seatbelt. The best is you never need it but in an emergency it helps you.

True.

I think I'll just stick to giving my parents chocolates.

Avery what's the matter? Are you ok?

Maija So you will then have only the chain instead of the block piece when you are with Anna, will you? Maybe will the connecting chains to the bra removed as well.
Will your sister also get some relief over the holidays?

Max9 what's the matter? Are you ok?

Appreciate your response.

Amira if it is going to be a mistake then I always can step back out of it. Thank you for genuinely worrying!

because tomorrow is christmas (and i hope you're still reading this) a little tip: don't promise your parents to stay chaste until next christmas, but say this: " i promise to try everything to stay chaste until next christmas and i'm sure If you support me, I have a good chance"

Avery
But there is one major difference:
Your values are far less strict than Amira`s. For you, if you fail you start over and just go on.
For her even one slip-up is completely unacceptable. If you have a zero tolerance for failure, of course you will have to take far more extreme measures to ensure that.