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  • Other people want me to wear a chastity belt

Carlos Congratulation to stand up for yourself and you are still together.

I recommend you talk with her about her bad experience and how you can help her to overcome the mistrust. Ask her if she think if it would help to go to professional. They can help her to solve her problem. It would improve you both life.

    Joh Could also share this with her.
    Iโ€™m not proud of it, but many times I was the girl they cheated with.
    I never had to try very hard, those boys were all trash and with the least amount of effort they were with me.
    It hurts Iโ€™m sure, but she needs to know those boys were never going to stay, and were trash from the start. The ones worth keeping turned me down every time without fail.
    Hope I can meet a girl or boy like that

      Sasha

      But with you it's the other way round, @Carlos' girlfriend has been cheated on and hasn't slept with other men herself, the bad thing is that now she is projecting her fear onto @Carlos.
      PS: good that you have now taken a different path, I don't know how necessary the chastity belt is for that, but it seems to influence you positively. ๐Ÿ™‚

        Angelina I know, I just feel itโ€™s necessary that the people who have been cheated on understand why it happened.
        It was never them. The cheater was trash from the start, had no respect and wasnโ€™t worth keeping to begin with. Iโ€™m sure it hurts, it has to. But she did nothing wrong, and that wasnโ€™t a relationship that would last anyway.
        As far as my chastity, it was entirely necessary. Sex was like a drug to me. Just needed more and more and didnโ€™t care how I got it. The trash that cheats on good girls like her were the easiest. Absolutely no effort required.

          Sasha

          it is certainly hard to be cheated on and certainly hard to build new honest feelings for someone afterwards, but still you should not lock your partner in a chastity belt against their will. in your case i am glad that you are interested in honest relationships now, good luck

            I had a scenario where a woman I once dated, was actually married and I didn't know that until many months later.

            The thing about people is that everyone is different, and if Carlos' girlfriend cannot see him as a different guy than her ex, then she is going through an issue she needs to solve first before entering the relationship. I don't know if she had time to forget her ex, but carrying that baggage into this current relationship is going to stress you out, Carlos. I would suggest working together with her to show that you are a different person, but she needs to put more effort into being honest about her views. That sniffing clothes crap is doubt, and if she isn't 100% set on working it out, then this woman may be a lost cause.

            Teach her to see everyone differently, not as the same scum that she met before.

              Raziel I agree in principle, though I think a little Latitude for her is warranted give that she just had a pretty major step imposed on her, no matter how necessary it was.
              That definitely has to be temporary, for her sake as much @carlos since I can't imagine that level of paranoia is healthy or pleasant.
              Edit: corrected word choices

              Raziel if Carlos' girlfriend cannot see him as a different guy than her ex, then she is going through an issue she needs to solve first before entering the relationship. I don't know if she had time to forget her ex, but carrying that baggage into this current relationship is going to stress you out, Carlos

              Strongly agree with this. โฌ†

              But as @pestulens writes, it is a big change. The belt was already in place at the start of the relationship and also your acceptance of control wasn't in any real doubt back then. Time is required here.

              In terms of cheating, you are a different man and should not be treated as if you've been unfaithful when you haven't. That would be very wrong.

              Hope things are going ok @Carlos.

                Raziel I had a scenario where a woman I once dated, was actually married and I didn't know that until many months later.

                Chastity belt could be an answer

                  Laura For him or for her? Absurdity of both is the same.

                    Jonas In terms of cheating, you are a different man and should not be treated as if you've been unfaithful when you haven't. That would be very wrong.

                    right, i think that is the crucial point, every person is different

                    Renita With engraved marital status ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

                    ๐Ÿ˜‚

                    PS: @Carlos Any Updates?

                    Laura
                    Ironically, I suggested it for foreplay, but she was extremely shy. She admitted everything later, and she lives in an abusive relationship, but enjoyed my company more, because I was kind and nurturing. I didn't bother with her since, because it was messed up being the side piece. This was way back in 2017, so it's all good now. Plus, I prefer to keep it monogamous.

                    There is more to this story, but it is off-topic and inappropriate. Nothing else about it is good anyway, so it's whatever.

                    Renita With engraved marital status

                    Do you have such engraving on your belt, just in case? ๐Ÿ˜‚

                      Renita No, but probably I should, mentioning I'm still single.

                      sounds interesting, engravings in the belt like "unmarried daughter" or "wife" haha ๐Ÿ˜‚

                        Angelina sounds interesting, engravings in the belt like "unmarried daughter" or "wife" haha ๐Ÿ˜‚

                        "Unmarried"
                        "UnUnmarried"

                        That way you don't have to erase. You can just add. lol