"Coming Out"

Avery I don't think there is more sexual objectification there than, say, in the US.

It depends on how you define objectification. Generally I would argue that the value of virginity is higher in places with a strong patriarchy, where wives are seen as part of their husbands' possession, and probably most extremely in places where a girl is considered almost a commodity to be traded from father to prospective husband. Yes, visual sex appeal is probably more valued in communities that do not place such high values on virginity (though there is always the hypocrisy of wanting every person of your preferred sex to be promiscuous except for your spouse and offspring), but I would say this is only one of many forms of treating women as objects.

Damien How did you feel?

Like a chastity model.

Jonas Under what circumstances?

She wanted to brag about her "brilliant" idea.

Jonas Surely not the whole belt, just waistband?

Waistband only.

Jonas to get her to become her mother's keyholder

Yes, and now she can show off her own belt.

Christine She wanted to brag about her "brilliant" idea.

Sometimes I want to urge you to return back into the belt (because it really does seem like there’s a part of you that wants to be convinced or told to do so), and I get of a mind to write tp a “you know you want/deserve/need it” statement to you. And then I’m reminded of the horror your mother made of keeping you as s chastity doll. Your belting should have been a private matter between you and not fodder to make you into a sideshow act. Im sorry she did that to you.

Christine idk if it counts. Mom showed my belt to relatives. Ofc locked on me.

she didn't really do that?
sorry, with alem what you can accuse my father, but this is a public humiliation and an absolute nogo

Christine She wanted to brag about her "brilliant" idea.

the brilliant idea to lock up your daughter's genetalia and humiliate her publicly? sorry, i know i sound as harsh as @Kaja now, but i really don't have the words for that

Christine idk if it counts. Mom showed my belt to relatives. Ofc locked on me.

Did you consent before? Or did she simply pull up your top without any warning?

Either way I guess it also depends on how you felt at this point about it. If you didn't mind and your mum knew you are fine with it, no harm done.

Everything else I would personally have issues with. But that's just me.

Christine May I ask how was it shown?

Saintprudence Sometimes I want to urge you to return back into the belt

I might have to, coz I have a boyfriend.

Saintprudence And then I’m reminded of the horror your mother made of keeping you as s chastity doll.

No, she is not the monster you think. She was just too keen on her idea.

Jonas I expect she doesn't show off her own chastity belt to the relatives

I hope to have this chance.

Angelina the brilliant idea to lock up your daughter's genetalia and humiliate her publicly?

Not publicly. To the family only.

Zoe Did you consent before?

Why? Remember that her idea was "brilliant".

Zoe Or did she simply pull up your top without any warning?

She asked me to do it.

Zoe Either way I guess it also depends on how you felt at this point about it. If you didn't mind and your mum knew you are fine with it, no harm done.

Right. I didn't mind and everything was fine.

KarimM May I ask how was it shown?

The lock on the waistband and the key on her necklace.

Christine oh not the full thing. Did you lower your lower clothes?

Christine Why? Remember that her idea was "brilliant".

Have tons of brilliant ideas too. No clue why I often fail at the execution x)

There are special dynamics between parents and partners or best friends. A few things don't need a conversation.

Guess for most of us, our underwear is something really private. Doubt not many get the idea to show it off on their body at Family gatherings.

Just glad you were fine with it and don't have to avoid family members for the next decades

KarimM Did you lower your lower clothes?

No, coz I worn the waist style belt.

Zoe Just glad you were fine with it and don't have to avoid family members for the next decades

Family members got disappointed since I stop wearing a belt.

MissBlossom Congrats!

Thank you.

Christine i see

Christine Family members got disappointed since I stop wearing a belt.

Did you tell them, they can borrow it now?

Zoe Just glad you were fine with it and don't have to avoid family members for the next decades

You avoid family meetings, because some can notice your belt?

Markus You avoid family meetings, because some can notice your belt?

Nope. I got more secure with wearing the belt outside and learned how to dress to avoid flashing it. Just when i did something stupid and have to wear the thighbands as well, I am still not comfortable going out.

In Christines case everyone was told and shown that she is wearing a cb. Friends you can avoid. Family not so much.

Imagine sitting at your grandpas birthday party and your aunty casualy asking if you are still wearing it. Or everyone staring at your crotch trying to figure it out without asking.

While one of best friends probably would just ask, if they want to touch it, i would just try to get out of there as fast as i can

Zoe Did you tell them, they can borrow it now?

No, these belts are mine. They should order their own for their women.

Jonas Even if she refuses to show her waist band the fact that you asked will inform anyone present that she's wearing.

But I will ask her consent first, if she is OK how her brilliant idea works in her case or she likes to keep it in secret.

Jonas I wonder whether your experience with chastity has changed your views on sex before marriage in any way?

Not changed, but it would be unfair if I enjoy sex with my boyfriend. Or I have to release mom from her belt, that I don't want to.

Christine But I will ask her consent first, if she is OK how her brilliant idea works in her case or she likes to keep it in secret.

I'm still impressed at how maturely you handle the whole situation. I think many people in your shoes would be tempted by a desire to get some revenge, but you manage to keep making ethical and respectful decisions.

Christine Not changed, but it would be unfair if I enjoy sex with my boyfriend. Or I have to release mom from her belt, that I don't want to.

Are you thinking of asking your mom to hold your keys again? If so, do you plan to negotiate for breaks this time?

MissBlossom I'm still impressed at how maturely you handle the whole situation. I think many people in your shoes would be tempted by a desire to get some revenge, but you manage to keep making ethical and respectful decisions.

I agree. I too would expect an element revenge, but @Christine is consistently and firmly, fair. It's amazing.

MissBlossom Are you thinking of asking your mom to hold your keys again?

The million dollar question. Is it fair for them both to refrain from pre-marital sex, but for only one to wear a belt to enforce it?