Vanessa Yes,but better than having no privacy.And you may tell you would prefer to know if your father is already here,or if you have to wait in the hot/cold/rain(depending on the day)..

But why shouldn't I do this in the waiting room, especially during the pandemic I wouldn't be allowed to wait there anyway.

Vanessa It probably haven't help him to trust @Sara2001 enough,yes.

My father thinks that orgasm prevention for us has nothing to do with trust but he fears that we probably can't stand the urges, no matter what we want. He thinks supervision is necessary at all times when we are not in our belts and nothing can change it.

        Sara2001 But why shouldn't I do this in the waiting room, especially during the pandemic I wouldn't be allowed to wait there anyway.

        It may not be very logical,yes,but could allow some privacy.

        Sara2001 no matter what we want.

        It is close to not trusting you about self-control,so.

              Vanessa It is close to not trusting you about self-control,so.

              It's more that trusting us in this area is not an opinion. He strongly believe that control is better then trust is better in this area. No matter how good or bad we act.

                  Sara2001 It's more that trusting us in this area is not an opinion. He strongly believe that control is better then trust is better in this area. No matter how good or bad we act.

                  It is normal if you could not control yourself after being in chastity for 5 years ..
                  so i can understand why your father didn't want to take any risks ..it has nothing to do with trust ..he knows that only control can prevent you from this and he is right in my opinion..

                    Sara2001 After a few years without any opportunities, a toilet in a doctor's office maybe can become an appropriate atmosphere, especially if you keep in mind that you have much more privacy at European toilet compared with American standards.

                    Then what's your goal? Cheat or stay chaste?

                        HHelen Then what's your goal? Cheat or stay chaste?

                        I don't want to cheat anyway, but not for my father but for Daniel. I see it as a kind of gift to him.

                            Vanessa Yes,sin this case,it would harder for him to come with you in the waiting room.

                            right but he can see most of it from outside, just not the doctor's room, so it makes almost no difference in our case.

                            Vanessa It is close to not trusting you about self-control,so.

                            But you must also admit that it is difficult to control yourself in this point.

                                  Sara2001

                                  I can understand it,even if I don't agree.

                                  Sara2001

                                  Do you think you would be able to not cheat if you have the opportunity,and be sure to not be caught?

                                  Angelina But you must also admit that it is difficult to control yourself in this point.

                                  I agree.

                                  I doubt I would have enough self-control...

                                          Vanessa Do you think you would be able to not cheat if you have the opportunity,and be sure to not be caught?

                                          I like to think so. I would have to lie to Daniel about it and this would make me feel very bad.

                                              Vanessa I doubt I would have enough self-control...

                                              that's how I see it with me too

                                              Sara2001 I like to think so. I would have to lie to Daniel about it and this would make me feel very bad.

                                              understandable, but that doesn't seem to convince your father enough for him to forego certain measures, does it?

                                                    Angelina understandable, but that doesn't seem to convince your father enough for him to forego certain measures, does it?

                                                    If I wouldn't have Daniel, I would for sure use absolutely any save opportunity. My father has not changed his points of view regarding masturbation since I am in a relationship with Daniel, why should he?

                                                        Sara2001 I thought about in a way of possibilities I decided not to use for Daniel.

                                                        Praiseful and far-sighted

                                                        Sara2001 I like to think so. I would have to lie to Daniel about it and this would make me feel very bad.

                                                        This is an important reason and a nice gift to Daniel. Your father should not interfere in your relation.

                                                            Sara2001 My father has not changed his points of view regarding masturbation since I am in a relationship with Daniel, why should he?

                                                            take me as an example, my views on masturbation change almost completely as soon as someone is in a relationship. 😉

                                                              Sara2001 this would make me feel very bad.

                                                              Understandable.

                                                              Sara2001 why should he?

                                                              Because he may know you don't want to lie to your fiancé about it.

                                                                    Vanessa Because he may know you don't want to lie to your fiancé about it.

                                                                    From his point of view, I don't have to lie to him this way, too.

                                                                    He trusts him, he believes me that I want all this and that I would not do anything like this just for Daniel, but he still thinks that prevention is the best option.

                                                                        Sara2001
                                                                        This raises the following question for me:
                                                                        Did Daniel and you agree to follow your father's rules or do you accept it because you don't want to face the consequences?
                                                                        The result is the same only it changes the whole situation.

                                                                            Joh Did Daniel and you agree to follow your father's rules or do you accept it because you don't want to face the consequences?

                                                                            I feel that I have answered this question a thousand times before 😃

                                                                            We don't fight against my fathers rules because it is not worth it. Of course we would prefer if Daniel had the key to my belt, but beside this, not much would change.

                                                                                Sara2001 I feel that I have answered this question a thousand times before

                                                                                Sorry, not really.

                                                                                Sara2001 We don't fight against my fathers rules because it is not worth it.

                                                                                From what you have told us, trust is not a part of your father's vocabulary. The way it looks to me, he wants to have everything under control.
                                                                                What all parents need to learn is to let go of their children so they can build and live their own lives. Do you think he can do that and not interfere with you?
                                                                                My previous question was aimed exactly at that. In order to live your own life, you have to make your own decisions and not be patronized by your parents. This does not mean that you should have no contact with each other. But it is a huge difference if I ask my parents for advice and then decide what I do or if they tell me what to do and what not to do.

                                                                                A general knowledge from parenthood is: if you want to keep someone, let him go.

                                                                                Sara2001 but beside this, not much would change.

                                                                                Exactly. Nothing would change, so why he insist to control you both?

                                                                                As I wrote in another topic. I try to bring up a new view. It is on you to decide nobody else.

                                                                                        Sara2001 We don't fight against my fathers rules because it is not worth it. Of course we would prefer if Daniel had the key to my belt, but beside this, not much would change.

                                                                                        what if your father's and daniel's instructions contradict each other. who do you have to listen to then? i know you have written several times that the two of them try to agree, but there are certainly things where they have completely different opinions, aren't there?

                                                                                        Joh As I wrote in another topic. I try to bring up a new view. It is on you to decide nobody else.

                                                                                        that's ok too, but most of the time you are just describing the problems and what solutions should ideally look like, but sometimes a compromise is the better option. 🙂

                                                                                              Angelina but sometimes a compromise is the better option.

                                                                                              Sure. I agree. A compromise it better than nothing but you need a goal. As a compromise implies it will be something between. If you have a low level goal the compromise will be less.