Am i normal?

Steve You sound very close to your friend. Important not to mess that up. Has she had relationships during this time?

Steve i guess it really made me... hm not dull... but a bit picky when i search for a relationship.

The perfect relationship won't just appear, no matter how long you wait. You have to work with someone to create it.

Steve still i am very shy when talking to women i meet the first time and it takes a lot of time before i feel comfortable enough to open up and/or trust someone enough.

Try asking women out before you know them well, and then using your dates to figure out how well matched you are. There's no harm in dating someone a few times, realizing it won't work, and respectfully ending it.

Steve find someone. first, as i find it hard to open up and then she has to accept me as i am. which sounds stupid and generic but it really is a big problem here.

This problem have everyone. As @MissBlossom recommended you have to talk to them and it could be via mails first and on several dates. With time you will be easier on dates and finding out if she match you or not. Also their is no need to tell her at the beginning about your chastity. You don't want sex in the early state is sufficient to tell.

I active searched for my current partner over one year. So it needs time anyway.

Steve first, as i find it hard to open up and then she has to accept me as i am. which sounds stupid and generic but it really is a big problem here.

Maybe try looking on dating sites related to BDSM (if you would like a femdom/FLR relationship).

@Steve

I see the big problem in the fact that you already seem to be a very shy person and I really wonder if the belt doesn't make the problem even bigger?
What is the relationship status of your best friend?

Steve so even after i opened myself up and decided to write someone, it was very disappointing most of the tim

Ok, I think I'm starting to understand your situation. Undoubtedly, it is quite difficult to solve. The only other thing I can suggest is moving to a city where people are more open to sexual kinks and where is bigger BDSM community.

Steve i am. its hard to find someone that truely accpets you as you are. at least here.

Maybe get a t-shirt with "Ask me about my chastity belt!" on it. Conversation starter, and, it would get the belt issue out of the way right at the outset of any relationship!!

More seriously; the longer I spend in enforced chastity the more it becomes a part of who I am. I've made peace with it and so really don't care who knows about it.

The title of this discussion suggests that you're still worried about what other people will think about you. So I'm not totally joking about the T-shirt... What I'm saying is be proud of who you are and all you've achieved!!

With confidence, everything else will come to you.

Jonas I've made peace with it and so really don't care who knows about it.

Easier like this

Steve

maybe you will develop a relationship with your keyholder, there seems to be no one who has been as intimate with you as she has and she already knows about your secret, so you can avoid the need to have uncomfortable conversations.
what do you think the chances are?

Steve Not sure I’d accept telling her friends about it. If you wanted to share that would be different, but I couldn’t accept that as a requirement.
Her being the lead doesn’t sound all bad, if you’re happy with that no worries. But it seems that statement is based entirely on your chastity. I could be entirely wrong but that implies to me she sees you as sub based on that alone.
And the big one. I could not accept not being unlocked despite a relationship. To me there should be conditions to get that. A timeframe, engagement, marriage, a certain anniversary, etc.
hope this helps

i was just wondering if you've ever had an orgasm? Of course she will take the lead and of course you'll accept it. I think if i were you i'd ask what her defination of a relationship would be. Just as an outsider looking in, plus her early demands, i can only guess you're headed for complete female domination and ALL that entails. I also doubt that she would ever unlock you. But you would have love. I see a very demanding woman and a man that has not yet made peace with his own submissivness. All in all; i'd take the deal in a heartbeat. See you on fetlife soon!

Steve If you feel it it will be fine with her than why not but I recommend you talk about every detail in advance.

• What does she understand taking the lead? In some parts or all of your relationship?
• Under what conditions will you be open-minded and when and how often will you have sex?
• If you can not fulfil her expectation will their any penalty?
• What influence and in what way are your wishes taken into account?
• If you decide you don't want to continue the relationship, will she hand you the keys straight away?
• How should the finances be regulated?
  If you live in a flat, who will be in the tenancy agreement?
  etc.

Steve After all she sent me home with some things to think about.
I won't get unlocked even if we enter in a relationship (at least for now).
She will take the lead in the relationship. However it won't be onesided as she wants me to be happy.
I should tell her best friends about my chastity and start to accept it.

The only thing I would have serious reservations about is the lack of unlocking. On the one hand, I understand her position, because she probably doesn't want you to see a relationship with her as a form of easy satisfaction. On the other hand, if your goal is to establish a normal relationship and have children, you should discuss this openly with her and agree on the rules under which you will be able to satisfy yourself.