Avery I see, I wonder whether these attitudes are based on religion or culture or what

Mostly family tradition

Sin I don't even remember having one tbh.

Have you ever seen a gyn?

        Laura

        Laura Mostly family tradition

        Thanks. I do seek to understand this better.

            Laura yes.
            I remember what happened (wakeboarding 😖), but I mean I don't really remember what it was like prior to that, and I never really considered it as something I "lost" at that particular point in time. I certainly don't consider it anything even remotely sexual. It was just another sporting injury (of which there were lots!).

            For my parents it's not the physical state of having a hymen in place that's important, it's your actions and behaviour.

                Avery I was happy to read your last sentence. As a somewhat religious person I would follow what I believe is God's teaching

                My understanding of religion is that it's what's in your heart that matters, not between your legs. 🙂

                    Sin I think if you follow "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" you're golden. Think of a world where everybody did that.

                    Separately, watching American football right now the Philadelphia Eagles kicker is a guy named Arryn Siposs who was born in Melbourne, Australia. Once played for the Dandenong Victoria Stingrays

                    • Sin replied to this.

                        Avery I think if you follow "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" you're golden. Think of a world where everybody did that.

                        Good call. :-)
                        I know nothing about Australian football let alone American football! I'm from the other side of the country. The only stingrays we have are likely to kill you!

                          This thread has reminded me of something I've wondered about.
                          What is the purpose of a hymen? I'm not religious so 'It's God's way of helping to keep you pure' type answers mean nothing to me, but does a hymen have a practical function? Is it a leftover feature like the coccyx? Perhaps @Foxies can enlighten us?

                            Tonyand03 What is the purpose of a hymen?

                            It's just cling wrap for your vagina to keep things smelling nice and fresh. Once you pop it it's like BAM! Fish guts forever. 😁

                                Sin Not sure I'm TOTALLY convinced, but it's certainly a very eloquent explanation.

                                    Tonyand03

                                    There is not a distinct purpose, it is a matter of debate still now.
                                    Ancient people believed it was all magic and stuff, then religious people believed some stuff which was copied from that (like all religions, just the adaptation of ancient superstitions).
                                    Some girls have it, some do not, some notice when it goes, some do not.

                                    It is like giving power and a mythology to an appendix with no purpose whatsoever because "people told you so".

                                    Behavior over physical form all the way.

                                        It's there to help guys keep an accurate count of how many virgins they've deflowered.

                                          Avery

                                          I have not read all the answers and frankly it took me three times to understand the question. 😂

                                          from a purely physical point of view, this person is no longer a virgin, but perhaps it is possible to have the hymen restored at the cost of health insurance, at least if one attaches importance to it. from a psychological point of view, this girl is of course still a virgin, it is not her fault that her virginity was taken from her by force.

                                          I think couples should talk openly with each other, especially if it is very important to one partner that the girl is still a virgin, as I said, maybe this can be restored.

                                          I hope I have understood the question correctly

                                              Tonyand03

                                              Thanks for thinking of me as some sort of oracle on this. 😀

                                              Alas, I am afraid I am as in the dark as all of you. I have read several theories (such as it can help keep bacteria our which might convey some evolutionary advantage to the human female) but none are very convincing to me. The jury is still out so far as I know in the scientific communities.

                                                  Foxies Thanks for that, Foxies. Maybe it really is God's way of helping to keep you pure.

                                                    Avery I am particularly interested in people's attitudes concerning forced sex, e.g. rape, incest, and how they relate to chastity and virginity.

                                                    Or "occasionally" as it usually happens.

                                                    Tonyand03 but does a hymen have a practical function?

                                                    For the parents' convenience.

                                                          HHelen For the parents' convenience.

                                                          And not only.
                                                          I do not think of myself as a radical, but I like keep my hymen inside me.
                                                          It is a symbol, and as all symbols, it is important.

                                                              Ines

                                                              Symbols are important but prone to idolatry: being tied to hymen could not be really meaningful. Better to stick to the mindset than to the physical factor.

                                                              Differently from the past with all superstitions and magical stuff, today we know for sure (and we have even some examples in this discussion) that it could be lost even by accident. Or with time. Or it could be even miss from the start. Basically it is no more an accurate virginity indicator, it is just... A symbol of luck? Is like knees which never got bruised while playing.
                                                              It doesn't even get lacerated for sure by intercourse: intact hymen does not ensure the absence of sex as much as a lacerated one does not mean that the deed was done.

                                                              But the rules are rules. No hymen, no virginity.
                                                              And sex has no exclusive on that.
                                                              ...does that means that physical virginity is an hoax?
                                                              I think it is a surpassed symbol as much as a flat Earth model.

                                                              We really need a clearer definition. We must understand if virginity means purity and abstention or just having an intact membrane which relates to sex but not always.